#kjaneway115

@lodessa​ Your top 5 E/NC17-rated J/C stories (either yours or someone else's)

I’m going to go with my own; because, that in an overwhelming enough proposition, let alone the exponential level of options if I go the other way (also because what writer can resist any excuse to talk about their writing):

The Smallest Twine

A pre-Voyager AU, featuring Janeway’s compartmentalization issues and would be machmaker Will Riker.  There’s something especially romantic about this story, about imagining them finding each other in completely different circumstances and still falling for each other (about the idea that a chance meeting might change the whole galaxy’s fate). This is definitely a story I think I love/rank a lot higher than most of my readers, but its possible it just fell between the cracks.  Which is why I’ve never written the intended sequel I suppose.

What You Can’t Forget

This was intended to just be a fun little trope piece, but it ended up a much more resonant Endgame fix.  Things I like about it: the exploration of what the hell happened, the romantic notion around Chakotay remembering Kathryn and only Kathryn through head trauma induced amnesia, but then also the way the sex scene took on a life of its own, bringing the bitter up with the sweet as the walls come tumbling down. 

Love in the Open Hand

Another fic I have always felt never reached its audience, and which started out as tropey fun but then got serious.   This isn’t a get-together/first-time fic.   Instead it looks at them as an established relationship, stable and secure enough to look back and reckon with some of their (in this case Janeway’s) emotional baggage and history.  What is love and how does memory work and is there a right way to grieve?  I felt like I gave those a good shake here, without straying too far from some impassioned smut. 

Things You Shouldn’t Be

I’ve written Admiral Janeway/Chakotay three times and this is my favorite, because it really manages to capture not just the heartbreak but the ugliness of how things twisted... how they did.   Not to mention, it explains a canon scene that makes no sense in the process.   So if you are looking for something less ideal and sweet and more messy and complicated... that is what this is.

Slip of the Tongue

This is one of my quietest and most understated versions of them getting together.  It’s soft and reflective, natural rather than dramatic.   Nothing ugly or complicated, just love and trust and FINALLY.