#kittychako

So far, so good! Zero seems to be doing reasonably well. There were quite a few reporters waiting for us at the entrance of the hospital, so one of our friends gave us a hand with making our way home a more subtle way. 

We’re home safe— for reasons that I can’t really go into, Zero’s home is, essentially, off the grid. He’s not once had a problem with any reporters or villains or the odd fan— not that any of you are odd! There’s just a few that tend to get a little... too obsessive. 

Of course, I’ll be in and out over the next few days while I’m attending to business, but Zero’s agreed, however begrudgingly, to remain on the sidelines for now. I’m hoping that he’ll take it easy for the next few weeks, but you all know Zero— he’s an unstoppable force. 

A very, very stubborn unstoppable force. 

As for the conference— we’re arriving a little early! 

The conference isn’t due to begin until Monday, but we’re leaving Friday evening. We should arrive sometime the next morning; the flight’s nearly fourteen hours long. Plenty of time to convince Zero that he should get some rest in, but, uh— also plenty of time to spend sitting next to Zero in tightly packed, confined metal tube flying through the sky. 

I did mention that Zero sometimes accidentally produces explosions in his sleep, didn’t I? I might have to find a way to keep Zero awake after all... 

With that in mind, I expect that we’ll both spend a few hours that morning sleeping in our respective hotel rooms. We’re scheduled to have a late lunch with some of the other participants in the afternooon— including Triomphe! 

I’m excited for that— or I feel like I would be, if... You know. It’s just. 

It’s been a lot. Lately. Zero... 

Ah. Right. Triomphe. 

I haven’t seen him in a long time— we do talk occasionally, though. It’s a bit difficult to squeeze in video chats when time zones and busy schedules have to be considered, but, somehow, we’ve managed to fit in a handful here and there. 

We know a few of the other representatives that will be attending! BrainBug, for one. He’s another representative from Japan— I’m sure that most of you know him. The two others from this year’s Japanese selection are Gale, InvisaInk, and

And the dead asshole. 

You know the one. 

Which is bullshit, by the way. He’s been sidekicking it up in China for the last year— why the fuck is he getting chosen to represent Japan at some hotshot conference halfway around the world?  

Hell, why is he even getting selected in the first place? Did you all see his last major fight? 

And if you fucks get Deku singing praises about the French fuckhead again, I’m gonna puke. Do you want me to puke? Yeah, I didn’t think so. 

Watch out. 

Looks like that merde’s flying right over your fucking head. 

Kacchan! 

Don’t be so mean! 

To ChargeBolt and your fans— jeez! I think he meant Triomphe. For some reason, he holds a certain... contempt for him that I don’t quite understand. I mean, he’s never even talked to the guy, much less met him. 

A long time ago, I would’ve said— well, I would’ve figured it’s because Triomphe is Quirkless, but I know that Zero’s grown past that mindset now. I don’t know how else to really look at it, though...

I mean, it’s not as if he’s— well, it’s not as if he isn’t an asshole (for all that I admire him, I still think that Zero’s the biggest jerk I’ve ever met in my life) to even his own friends— as seen above —but this seems... different. More than the usual irritation that he uses to regard most people. 

Maybe getting to meet him in person will change Zero’s attitude towards him, though! If only a little bit. Maybe. 

Hopefully. 

I trust that Zero will be on his best behavior when representing his entire country, anyways. He’s usually level-headed when he feels that the situation calls for it. 

Then again, he could’ve meant my French... he does tend to give me weird looks when I’m speaking it whenever I’m video chatting or calling one of my French-speaking friends... 

It’s strange. 

I feel as if it’s hit me, but at the same time, it hasn’t quite settled in. You’re right, of course. He saved my life. 

And he almost sacrificed his. 

I don’t want to be someone that people sacrifice their lives for— what I am... what I represent, it’s not worth that. It’s not worth Zero. And I feel horribly guilty, because there’s another part of me that understand that there’s a bigger picture, and that some people might even expect that of him, but I—

I won’t let anyone or anything take him away from me. 

Not even myself. 

Does that make sense? 

I’ve had this conversation with myself a thousand times as I’ve waited by his bedside for him to open his eyes. There’s a lot of— feeling to it. 

There’s guilt. 

Zero wanted me to go after the person that shot the bullet in the first place. As a hero, it was my duty to do exactly that. To chase down the individual that had done this and to bring them to justice. I feel guilty for not pulling back to protect the civilians around us. I feel guilty for being the target— for my hand in what’s led up to this, for this— this thing that we’re pushing that seems to be bigger than ourselves. I feel guilty because I didn’t take the bullet. Because it was meant for me, not him. 

It’s my fault that he was shot. And I know that Zero’s angry at me for saying that, downright infuriated because he hates that I’m claiming all of this for myself, but I just— I can’t help but feel that way. 

There’s guilt for bringing all of you into this tangled fold of emotions— guilt for even telling you any of this, because that’s not what heroes are supposed to do, right? 

Even though, logically, I know that we made this blog to show you all that— that heroes aren’t infallible, to help you all accept the truth of that humanity— I’ve never wanted people to... to sacrifice, or to worry, because I’ve only ever wanted to save people with a smile. To ease fears and help those that need someone to help them. 

I feel like I should tell you all that it’s okay— because it is okay, because we have to be okay. 

But— I mean that, too. It’s okay. We’re not going to stand down, or stand aside. We’re going to fight— even it means fighting until the very end —to protect you all. And we’ll win, of course we’ll win, how could we do anything but? 

There’s... anger.

I feel so angry. All the time. I know that that’s an emotion that you all usually associate with Zero, but— I just... To just continue with your duties as you normally do, while your friend is bedridden because of the bullet that he’s taken in your place, knowing that the people that have done to him are still out there, still free, still scheming at this very moment... 

It’s difficult. 

I’m sad. I’m sorry that it came to this. I want to find a peaceful resolve to this situation. I don’t think there has to be a fight, even still, even though there’s a part of me that’s thirsting for... For revenge, I suppose. 

But I know that I have to hold back. There are bad sides and good sides to all of us, and I know what part of myself that I want to win. I don’t want to become like some of the people that I’ve dealt with day in and day out. I want to help. Not hurt. 

There’s more, but it’s just... it’s difficult. To talk about. 

I don’t want to talk about it anymore. Not with you all, anyways. 

The last thing I want to do is worry you all more. I sincerely mean that. 

ok what about tho hmmmm

okay while there are def kr//bk shippers out there who either consciously or subconsciously push the idea that “wow kiri is reforming bkg as person just him no one else amazing” and “bkg talks to kiri — love” which can be ehhhhh at times cause it’s (1) untrue/exaggerating and (2) enforces the idea that romance is necessary and pushes that and the idea that platonic is not good enough (and y’all know i’m all about that ~platonic love~),

i DO also think that some op of these posts are clearly aware that they’re exaggerating and they’re just having fun with shipping

it’s kind of in the same vein as “whoa two characters i ship are in the same room together? they’re so in love”

like, i’m AWARE that’s not actually proof they’re in love i’m just joking around

and sometimes that can get clouded when it’s with a ship you don’t ship, not necessarily BECAUSE you don’t ship them, but yeah