#kitchen disasters

Want to write a kitchen disaster but aren’t sure where to start? Here are some bad cooking prompts to spark your inspiration!

Cooking without a recipe

Poorly written recipe

Didn’t follow the recipe

Kitchen is on fire

Don’t have all the ingredients

Oops! Wrong spice...

Forgot to check the expiration date/do a sniff test

Don’t have the appropriate cookware

How did you mess up boiling water?

Cooking-related injury

Forgot they were cooking and abandoned something in the oven

That dish is not oven-safe (or fire/stove/microwave-safe)

Cooking with a time limit

Sleep-deprived cooking

Drunk cooking

Multitasking disaster

Too many cooks in the kitchen

No access to a real kitchen

Baby’s first cooking adventure (children in the kitchen)

Previously-sheltered adult cooking for the first time ever

Pets causing kitchen chaos

Cooking badly on purpose

Thinks they’re a better cook than they are

Campfire cooking gone wrong

Holiday cooking gone wrong

Someone rearranged the kitchen/ingredient labels as a prank

Disastrous cooking process; surprisingly tasty results

Seemingly smooth cooking process; inedible results

Crying in the kitchen

After a long, long time away I have finally plucked up the courage to finish and post the second chapter of Catfished that has been living in my drafts for a while.

Much like the first chapter was my own take on the popular “texting” trope, this chapter takes on the whole “Indian James Potter wins Lily over by making her a curry” trope. (Not entirely sure if it this technically counts as a trope in and of itself, but I’ve definitely read one too many of these so hey here’s another!)

It’s basically just a bit of lighthearted fun, where you can laugh at James as he suffers through one kitchen disaster after another.

My friends are bullies

the ring seal mysteriously vanished from the blender -> milk all over the floor

best pan put away still sorta dirty -> scrubbing it out -> knocking the tap with my elbow and soaking myself with the spray

carton of whole milk turned itself to clotted cream in the fridge (GAAAAAHHHHH)

and to top it all off, 

“what’s in this ziplock?” -> “hey, did you know we still had half a bag of blueberries in the chest freezer?” -> “those don’t actually look like blueberries now that they’re cooking” -> “shit. that’s where the cranberries went.” 

So now I have a pot with about two cups of previously ice-locked local cranberries (hence the ziplock - label your berry-picking carefully, my peeps) that have been cooked down for about three minutes in half a cup of sugar and a tbsp of cornstarch. 

Mom: What did you do? Burn your wrap or set the toaster oven on fire?

Me: One of those, not the other.

Mom: You burnt your wrap.