#keves

TALAMASCA: THE SECRET ORDER

Thank you!!

"Women don't sully their looks when they top themselves." Top tier insight from the old man veteran investigator, Hough. The second investigator, Ridge finds a box with Soledad's silly putty (that Jasper so helpfully removed and left in a box there)

Soledad Marcel in bisexual club lighting as remembered by Checkers.

Dude Tadpole comes in from the rain right before sunset and Helen, aka Mommy Spy, makes him a nice cup of tea.

Lady Helen Mommy Spy Grantham Explains Nothing At All Accelerated Spy Prep Montage

Mommy Spy explains his cover story is a nervous breakdown and/or a death in the family (his non existent family:)

How is an incognito, off the books, clonezepam dependent spy going to get a refill on his prescription in another country when it runs out or cold turkey through his withdrawal symptoms?

She has a Boss -Orphan walk and talk in the cemetery with Tadpole, explaining his whole life is funded from her personal slush fund,

and has Dude quit/take a sabbatical at his law firm job before hopping in a cab [A CAB NOT AN UBER, she's not cheap] to JFK.

Mommy Spy explains his training is a year compressed into a week.

This training consists of:

Learning the 54 digit passcode to his laptop to sign in with a jump drive.

Paperbacks as decoder keys in a Page Line Word system. "This is your new favorite book. It never leaves your side. Until you use it once, lose it and carry your new favorite book. it's a decoder key. Page Line Word, go go go"

Tadpole obviously isn't a PK b/c he'd intuitively get "book chapter verse". But also shouldn't learning Spy Dewey Decimal system be his jam? It can't be any more arcane than the citation system.

Cramming on the plane with the texbook/training module: Spying For Dummies. This is the most amount of stealth in this show.

I'm envious Tadpole went through so much school and has 20/20 vision.

Why is the moon phase even important to the Talamasca at all?

Dude lands in London, finds his apartment, closes the blinds and stares off into space as the sun sets and doesn't turn on the lights. He is in bed, can't sleep in the yellow light and pops a klonopin. After it's dark in London, he takes from his flat down several dark unlit streets to stare at the Motherhouse where three windows are lit.

There's a timelapse shot of the sun rising and a cut to Checkers' demotion meeting for being honeypotted. This is a man who shares a name with Nixon's daughter's pet dog. We learn that Checkers is a dumbass who never looks at his wallet. It's over a week now and he's presumably left his dwellings more than once in that time? Also Checkers misses the "family" atmosphere and the lack of cameras in the loo, tells his boss he's not really in charge, calls the organization "a pirate ship" and flips off the camera.

White Walker Vampire is watching this like one of his daytime stories from his bordello room and chuckles from his couch.

Dude wakes up goes to job hawking strip club flyers, which he is extremely awkward at, because he is not an actor and he was not told he had to act or learn lines as part of his cover.

"Russian Asian Polish Exotic Sexy Sexy Strippers to Left Pole Dancing to the Right!" He can't even hawk the sexy sexy girls convincingly. I have doubt these girls are sexy. And from different countries.

Dude finds the sim card sign across the street, picks up baggy, goes to his apartment and accesses his computer when it's daylight and fails to turn on the lights as the sun sets so he's looking at everything in the dark.

The first thing Dude tries to access in London is his mother's personnel chart which gets Helenbot to ask him if he needs help. Dude freaks out and lies because he does not understand what root access means.

Just funny as hell everything about Anne Leamas is blacked out, including her astrological sign and her iris color.

The Talamasca believes knowing someone is a Libra Sun Taurus Moon Sagittarius Rising is like finding out Rumpelstiltskin's name. Did they collect Eglee's turning charts, pissing off the agents who organized Talamasca Tarot Tuesdays?

But there's some random info that's not redacted from Mop Top Mulder:

When it's fully dark he goes two streets down or maybe to just the corner to get his dinner, where he meets Keves who asks him a ton of questions, takes a polaroid of him and invites him to an after hours dance night in Hackney.

Mulder meets Keves at the club b/c who wants to sit in that basement with the sad statement lamp and drink another English beer (sorry). He finds the club based on Keves' right hand map. A grinding makeout session starts with Keves and her random friend and ends with Keves and Mulder going back to his room. (She's faking it.)

Maybe Dude is a Euphoria fan or it's 80s night, but why diagetically soundtrack this very heterosexual male gazey sequence in the club and his hookup to a song about leaving your hometown because of gay bashing?

"I broke all the rules! I'm breaking the rules! I'm a rule breaker!" -- Mop Top Mulder is far too into this to wonder why she's saying this incredibly strange/tame thing repeatedly during sexytimes. "I DOUBLE PAAARRRKKKKKED AUGNOH. I HAVE OVERDUE LIBRARY BOOKS! I AM VIOLATING THE HANDBOOK! GASP!"

Mulder falls asleep in the yellow light, as the birds tweet and we hear the trash being picked up outside she sneaks out of his apartment.

Sticky note? Sticky note? Endlessly funny. But at least she left a note?

At the strip club the next day, Dude eats a sad sandwich while watching a very bored stripper lap dance. He goes outside, sees a city maintenance worker clean the telephone booth. This sets Guy off on a sad trash raccoon treasure hunt to find out how and when he's going to track Archie.

page 41 of a blue edition of Don Quixote, in which he tilts at windmills.

He tracks Archie to dinner and Jasper immediately sets off his supernatural radar as he passes by on the street. Mulder thinks he's able to listen in on Archie, Owen, unnamed guy who squints & tilts his head to the side when he sees Guy, and Jasper without being detected, but Jasper immediately asks "What do we have here?" Guy gives himself away by turning to look, and turning away quickly. Archie leaves the restaurant.

During the extended chase scene he starts popping his anxiety pez- He could not be more conspicuous.

It doesn't matter what comes Fresh goes better in life With Mentos fresh and full of life Nothing gets to you Staying fresh, staying cool With Mentos, fresh and full of life!

He tracks his person to a warehouse, hears a fight and struggle, runs upstairs, and discovers Archie with a slashed neck. He then discovers dead Keves hanging. Dude is not equipped for any of this and he keeps trying to take her down, when he hears Archie choking on his own vocal cords, gurgling out "book" and pointing to Keves' backpack. He nonsensically keeps saying "It's ok" to reassure Archie or himself and runs out without taking the book. Keves, manic pixie spy, we barely knew you.

I suspect a vampire murdered one or both of these people. There's too much whooshing sounds and Keves' hanging and Archie's throat slitting happens rapidly.

Keves and Archie Murder Culprits:

Jasper (likes a pocket knife)

Revenant (but would they even have the control?)

-Keves' friend (if she's a vampire, the neck licking was extra in a way that's "I like veins" and not just sexy)

unnamed vampire

Sexpionage Basics for Swallows and Ravens

I guess sex doesn't overload his mind/make other people's thoughts leakier b/c that would explain so much of Guy's social life.

I don't think the Talamasca told him to get condoms or lube -- as part of his cover.

Judging by the obviousness of Checkers being honeypotted and Dude Tadpole being honey-potted, the Talamasca affiliated men are desperate, with or without the "Honey Potting for Dummies" chapter in the orientation training -- In addition to being nerds.

There is no way Dude Tadpole has enough charm or good looks for a random woman to hit on him, and to get her licky friend to join in and then come back to his unfurnished basement apartment to fuck him..

We Watch And Are Always There And Listening [heavy breathing noises]

Between the "cameras in the loo" and Mommy Spy using her Talamasca connections to get Tadpole, a man with a law degree, a work visa as a peep booth barker on short notice, it wouldn't surprise me the shell companies for the Talamasca are porn/sex trade/adult films of various sorts. Also, I'm sure that Talamasca apartment Guy lives in has hidden cameras

Baby's First Time Traveling Out of the Country

Defend Against Pickpockets: Guy Tadpole seriously has no basic awareness of how to avoid pickpockets. WTF with being jostled. Or his backpack. Or anything.

Get a Flashlight or Backup Power Source: Mop Top Mulder doesn't own lamps or flashlights or really uses them. Get a flashlight besides your smartphone, if your remit is skulking around in the dark.

Dress for the Weather: He's living out of his backpack, which must contain hair products. But not a bunch of extra clothing. You are from Detroit and somehow don't own a proper coat or winter clothes.

Have Contact Info For the State Department and Your Bank if Your Things Get Lost or Stolen. Mommy Spy literally tells him his 20,000 in British pounds is on various debit cards. He has all of them at once? He picks it up via his decoder books? If he gets pickpocketed, he's in London, broke, with no id, and good luck getting home or around. LMAO.

Sookie Stackhouse JD

Always Continuing Legal Education

Professions are just shorthand for things like "this Character is Smart" and "Does Books A Lot". Tadpole supposedly has this Big Law firm job in his pocket that he's being lured away from. If he cares, he should've already passed his New York State Bar Exam and been admitted to the bar, OR he should be currently shitting bricks over studying for the bar. B/c NO law firm is going to keep Tadpole on and pay that huge salary he's counting on without Tadpole being able to practice as an associate. Maybe Tadpole accepts this dumbass spy assignment as bait because he dreads the bar exam that much.

I don't believe for a second Mop Top Mulder has any special gifts the Talamasca nurtured.

They don't have him doing research, they don't train him in mental shielding during that entire years worth of training compressed into a week.

No, I think they placed him in the London Motherhouse because an untrained clairvoyant who can't shield their own mind and is a dumbass is catnip for vampires. Jasper the Lounge Lizard Wes Anderson Vampire told him as much and had him ready to plank walk off the building. He's Sookie Stackhouse JD.

Which means (arguably) smarter and savvier female without plot armor die for plot advancement.

.

Fridged Female Character Tally: Three. Soledad Marcel, Keves and Anne Leamas. Tadpole believes his mother, Anne Leamas, is alive(I have so many doubts) based on a photo that Daniel Molloy airdropped to him last episode, but Tadpole is such a credulous kid it could easily be faked or manipulated in many ways from timestamps, photo editing and maybe even AI.

Episode Meet Cutes:

Mop Top Mulder and Jasper: They catch a glimpse of each other in a crowd in the street, Mulder is peeping in his Unabomber fit (you own a suit, you could've dressed like you could go into the restaurant) and Jasper mindspeaks to him, causing Mulder to meet his eyes and turn away quickly. This isn't Dante seeing Beatrice.

Manic Pixie Dream Girl and Mop Top Mulder: 500 days of summer. Her name rhymes with Tevas and sounds like an offbrand hippy sandal.

Keves sounds like kheves or כֶּבֶשׂ in Hebrew, which translates to "lamb" or "sheep", perhaps a sacrificial one? [If Mop Top Mulder had any real interest in her as a person, he'd have said something other than "that's a unique name" which half the time is not a compliment, it's shade.]

pairing: zeon x gn!reader

tags: wholesome fluff, acts of service as zeon's love language, established romantic relationship, cuddling, affectionate!zeon

zeon cares deeply about the people in his life, especially you! he's very protective, not just when it comes to fighting on the battlefield, but in his everyday life too!

he's always there to help you, no matter how small the things you need help with is! cooking? zeon will help you cut vegetables unannounced. carrying something heavy? zeon will take it out of your hands and bring it where it needs to be.

zeon's love language is acts of services, so he's always doing something for you, without even realizing it half of the time

usually, he's pretty worn out by the end of the day, so he tends to fall asleep at the desk in his office or he'll want to cuddle before going to bed with you

in case he falls asleep at his desk, you usually bring him a blanket and make sure to get up a little extra early the next day, to bring some breakfast into his office

whenever zeon gets sleepy, he becomes a massive cuddler! he'll just wrap his arm around you from behind and rest his head on your shoulder, even if you're in public, despite being a rather private person

zeon also enjoys it when you play with his wings! they are still sensitive, but if you just gently trace your fingers over them, then it's enjoyable for him!