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"Ha bánatod van, gondolj ránk.
Ha szomorú vagy, szólj hozzánk.
Ha segÃtség kell, nyújts bátran a kezed,
Mi együtt szorÃtva segÃtünk neked."
- a pszichiátria falán ez a kedves üzenet van ki Ãrva. Megynyugtató ez a pár sor.
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My stepdad keeps saying i'm the 'best' child out of my 3 siblings, and i keep trying to tell him to use the word 'good' because while i'm more obedient and stuff that doesnt make me better than them. when he says it, it creates so much anxiety to spring up because the only thing that counts is that i'm the best out of the four of us at hiding my negativity. but it hurts because i want to lash out so much, but i have this expectation to stay calm and be good. i dont know what to do??
Hello Kerj,
I'm sorry that your stepdad does this, even when you've asked him not to, or to use different words. It sounds like it's really affecting you a lot. Do you think you'd be able to speak to your mum about what's going on? It may help to be able to open up to her, and let her know that it's something you're not comfortable with. She can then talk with your stepdad as well, and try to help him understand that he's not approaching things in a positive way.
As for wanting to lash out, do you know what's causing these feelings? Sometimes identifying the underlying emotion or cause to these feelings can be a good first step in understanding how you can fix, or cope with, what's going on. I really encourage you to think on it. Sometimes journalling can be a good process in discovering the underlying emotions that you're feeling, so I'd recommend that too.
Once you know what that feeling is, I really recommend talking to someone about it, whether it be to a friend, another family member or a counsellor. School counsellors can be a really good place to seek support from, and work through these feelings, so I'd definitely recommend them. There are also Helplines and Web Counsellors that you can reach out to for support, and ideas on how to cope with that feeling that's causing the thoughts of lashing out.
Good luck, lovely.
Take care,Alexandria.
