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kdval:

Black Friday Shopping with the whole gang (introducing Thor and Steve to the concept).

It’s Thor’s idea to go Black Friday shopping. At some point, someone (the Avengers learned early on that whenever Thor learns a new thing they didn’t want him to know about, it’s Darcy’s fault) convinced him that the day after Thanksgiving was just as important a holiday to the Midgardians. When he brings it up the Wednesday before, his suggestion is followed by a careful cone of silence.

“I’m not going,” Bruce breaks the silence calmly, not even looking up from his book. “You’re not putting me into a crowd of pushy, edgy people who’ve been up all night and all want the same three items, I don’t care how good the sales are. Hulk smashing Black Friday isn’t going to do anyone any good.”

“Green Friday,” Tony says immediately, and ducks as the book goes sailing over his head. “I don’t do sales. Billionaire, remember? Also, not too fond of shopping in general. In public, I mean. If I want it, I can get it delivered. Hell, I don’t even have to order it myself. I can make Pepper do it.”

“No you can’t,” Pepper interjects blithely.

“I can make someone do it,” Tony corrects without missing a beat. “But the rest of you guys have fun. Show Goldilocks the American way.”

“I’ll go,” Clint says abruptly. “I have some stuff I need to get anyway, and having Thor around means we can clear the crowds better.”

“You two aren’t going alone,” Natasha says in a rush. “You’ll get killed. Or explode something. Or both.”

“I missed this my first year out of the ice,” Steve says tentatively. “It seems like it’s one of those experiences everyone should have at least once…”

“Great!” Tony claps his hands. “The four of you can have a blast! And Bruce and Pepper and I will stay home and not go on terrifying retail adventures.”

---

Clint’s attempt to invite Phil and Maria falls through pretty spectacularly, so when Friday morning (four o’clock in the damn A.M., because Thor has decided if they’re doing this, they’re doing it whole hog) rolls around, it’s still only the four of them. The crowds are uncomfortably large already, and Natasha is fidgeting with an air of obvious disinterest. Clint can tell she wants to go home. Thor is still excited, but Steve seems more puzzled than anything. By the time the doors open, everyone’s a little run down. Clint accompanies Thor in the first mad rush, but the other two follow a little more sedately, a little less anxious to get involved in the crush of people.

“You know,” Steve mumbles to no one in particular. “This happened when I was a kid, too, except it was banks. It started the Depression.”