like, okay, i'm sure this scene has been talked about and dissected to pieces already in this fandom but. BUT. i need to put my two cents in or i will explode.
so, your lord and best friend has just admitted to you that if you die, he will be so beside himself with grief that he might just die too.
the game then gives you THIS option in response.
and you, the player, know how video games work. you know this is the press x for romance button. you expect henry to admit his feelings—a culmination of all the hints he's dropped from the heart options we've chosen before—and kiss him as soon as the button's been pressed.
except henry doesn't kiss hans.
instead, henry places his hand on hans' hand. it's the first moment of physical contact between them in the whole scene...but it's not a kiss. it's gentle. it's intimate. it's tiptoeing the line between comforting a friend and something more...
...but henry leaves it at that. and he gets up and goes to leave.
and in that moment of panic. in that split second of 'this might be the last time i'll ever see you again, please don't go' — it's hans that kisses henry.
and it's henry who pushes hans away.
this is—for all intents and purposes—the opposite of what we, the player, chose.
and to add insult to injury, henry looks conflicted.
he looks SO conflicted that hans believes he's fucked up royally.
that he has completely tarnished their final moments together by acting on impulse—by giving into temptation and desperation and feelings he can't even put into his own words—and henry must be disgusted by him.
and hans believes this because he watches henry turn his back to him. refusing to look at him. and head for the door.
but henry stops before he opens it. and i keep thinking back to the heart option we chose.
the player is not making the choice for henry to kiss hans. we are not forcing his hand.
the player is reminding henry what he's been telling himself throughout the entire game.
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I think about this specific moment a LOT. There is something in Henry's voice that tugs at my heart - a sadness, or even a resignation that Jobst does not and could never understand.
In the preceding conversation, if you pick the bottom dialogue option of these two...
...this is the THIRD time he tells Jobst that he made a promise to keep Hans safe (and even if you pick the top option, it's still the second time). There's even what feels like touch of desperation here, Henry not knowing where Hans is, and probably feeling like he failed. But it's so telling here that he never says a word about duty, or service, or mention the mission given to him by Hanush or Radzig with regards to Hans, just that he made a promise. Not an oath, not bound by duty. So all I can think about when I hear Henry say “I made a promise” is what he told Hans at Trosky in the very first romance dialogue:
Janosh Uher's (lack of) interest in women & sex... (p.1)
...with core members of Devil’s Pack as a comparative background for analysing Janosh
<part two> <part three>
When Kubyenka was telling Henry about other members of the Devil’s Pack, he mentioned that Janosh “was having the time of his life until recently! Wine, women and song! But now he has problems because people take him for a Cuman”,
suggesting Janosh enjoyed a lifestyle focused on personal pleasure. With an inseparable and hedonistic companion like Adder, this kind of lifestyle should not surprise anyone.
However, if player picked up the my character likes women too choice to explain why Henry thought he and Janosh would get along
The following dialogue actually contradicts the first Kubyenka’s description of Janosh while immediately connecting appreciation for female body and sex solely to Adder.
Henry: I’m already liking this Janosh. I think we’ll get along well.
Kubyenka: Janosh? Why?
Henry: I like girls. I like looking at them, and if they want, I have a little fun with them.
Kubyenka: Then you can shake hands with Adder. He would get himself killed just to get his prick wet.
In contrast, picking “I like good food” option will unlock this dialogue:
Henry: I’m already liking this Janosh. I think we’ll get along well.
Kubyenka: Janosh? Why?
Henry: I like good food, too. Life is always better with a full stomach.
Kubyenka: You two will surely get along then!
What implies Henry won’t bond with Janosh over women and sex with them but they would get along just fine because of food.
Thus the “women” part in the first description of Janosh as a man enjoying “Wine, women and song!” seems to be more a figure of speech than an actual Janosh’s interest in sex. Janosh called himself “a decent Christian” and one whose cock is “not for just anybody!”. Implying that Janosh doesn’t consider himself someone prone to have casual sex, the way for example, Adder is.
Kubyenka’s words are our first clue about the vital difference and simultaneous strong connection shared between Janosh and Adder. The further the story went, the more noticeable is how Janosh's sexual experiences (especially in regard to women but not only) or any interest in sex seems to happen mainly by proxy through Adder.
Before we will dwell more into source material, please keep it in mind this thesis is based on the content I managed to access so far. As KCD2 has a rich amount of dialogues and character interactions, I’m too well aware there are plenty of options I may yet not discover but which could potentially verify and refute the current thesis.
There are few exceptions when Janosh talked about sexual activity in regard to his own person AND ADDER WAS NOT INVOLVED. Two happened with Henry.
First, as one of dialogue options, when Janosh was still kept in the stocks and Henry offered to talk to Bailiff to free the imprisoned man:
Henry: Maybe I can talk the bailiff into letting you go.
Janosh: Yeah, sure. While you doing that, tell him to send wife here to suck my cock, hey?
From the context of the situation, Janosh used the sexual activity as a very vulgar way to express what he thought about Henry’s idea. As in, the chance Henry talked bailiff into letting Janosh free was as good as persuading bailiff to order his wife to perform oral sex on the convicted man. Which meant, no chance at all.
The second example comes from misunderstanding:
Janosh: You want my sausage? You never find better!
Henry: What are you blabbering about? What sausage?
Janosh: Proper one! Full of goodness! Maybe not smell so good, but taste good when you hold nose!
Henry: Please tell me you’re talking about food…
Janosh: Yeah, I talk about sausage, what else? Janosh’s sausage… Ah, I see! You think I means big, huge salami in my hose, hey? Haha! He is not for just anybody! Me, I am decent Christian!
There is also Janosh and Katherine’s dialogue, in which Janosh may genuine admire Katherine’s beauty, however their interaction (similar to some other dialogues and his claim “But Janosh can skin the hare better, even blindfold” than her) are not free from some tension or even passive-aggressive vibe. Janosh and Katherine’s dialogues can be seen here.
Katherine: Can’t you fetch wood at least. Or are you just going to sit around gawping all day?
Janosh: No, better I just admire your beauty.
Katherine: What about water? Hm?
Janosh: Anybody who get hit by the Cupid’s arrow, he feels no hunger, no thirst.
Katherine: One more word and you’ll be hit by a bucket of slops.
Janosh: Ah, Katie, Katie… Such pretty face, but ugly words!
(In game’s dialogue files, I found also Janosh’s most likely one of greetings / response to bad weather that goes like this:
<bffhans_uher_najlepsieogz>The best thing would be to find a nice warm place with a bottle of something good… and a pretty wench, haha… ||| Best thing is find nice warm place, nice cold beer and nice hot wench, hey?
in which the second version fits Janosh’s specific speech patterns but as I did not remember hearing it in available on YouTube Janosh’s voice lines and have no idea when - or if ever it was used in the game - and in what context Janosh would say it, please take it with a grain of salt.)
As was said before, Janosh is not prone to have casual sex. At the same time, there is no outrage at Henry - who, if dialogue happens right away after saving Uher’s life, is still a stranger at this point of story - for thinking Janosh offered him sex as payment for saving life, when generally speaking any sexual act for anything other than having children was considered a sinful activity at the best, or sodomy at the worst in the medieval times. What is even more important - Janosh actually needed a moment to figure out what Henry thought his offer could be but overall was quite amused by the misunderstanding. As I assume, because such a thing still happens between food-focused Janosh and sex-focused Adder too, if their background dialogue is anything to go by.
Otherwise, it seems like Adder is a constant part of Janosh’s involvement with widely understood sex.
Now, on one hand, this is an understanding situation: A) the Pole likes to talk about sex and B) Janosh is the person to whom Adder talks the most as only Janosh understands and speaks Polish. However! Janosh’s interaction with other characters is not limited by language barrier (the way Adder’s interactions are) so there is no reason for him to not discuss sex/women with his comrades and allies besides a lack of will or interest.
For example, before the attack on Malashov, Janosh and Kubyenka sat at the centre of the group with Brabant and Godwin. Janosh was telling some story involving a man and drinking. Adder kept a noticeable distance from the group.
After capturing von Bergow, Janosh and Dry Devil were seen together, making fun of Brabant and how he almost got himself killed while shooting from the cannon. Adder was not seen around.
Immediately after Adder’s death, Janosh isolated himself from the group out of grief. During the siege of Suchdol, we could see Henry, Kubyenka, Samuel, Musa and Godwin spending time together and talking about women (both Czech women and those from Musa’s homeland). Janosh, as far as my research went, talked with Kubuenka about Adder fucking angels and/or demons, only once(?) saying he is hungry like Italian whore (I will talk more about it in next part).
What gives the impression that Janosh doesn’t talk much about sex if Adder is not around and will rather discuss Adder’s sex (after)life with Kubyenka than talk about women with other male characters (though this may be fault of game mechanics as Janosh stayed in kitchen for most od the siege and in-universe there is Janosh's post-Adder death depression to take into account). What is also important to note, Janosh is not always willing to talk with Adder about sex either.
For example, during storming enemy’s fortress, Janosh was irritated by Adder’s behavior including yapping about being ready for good fuck in the middle of battle:
Polish version:
Adder: Już dojrzałem, by sobie pochędożyć, także do roboty!
Janosh: Wkurwiasz mnie. Chuj z ciebie i wkurwiasz mnie!
English version:
Adder: I’m ready for some good fucking so get back to work!
Janosh: You piss me off! You’re a dick and you piss me off!
Please note, Janosh is speaking here in Polish.
Or when Henry asked Janosh and Adder about their opinion of captured von Bergow and Adder, in his native language, showed sexual interest in Rosa - Janosh called his friend a pig and called Rosa an ally not hostage, most likely demanding some respect for the woman and/or making it clear to Adder the she is off limits. Adder remarked the girl could “repay” her saviors, and Janosh did not join in such fantasies, but kept Adder’s words from Henry - who may or may not romance Rosa at this point, depending on the player's choice.
Henry: How does von Bergow seem to you? He’s not nearly as threatening now…
Adder: I don't give a damn about von Bergow. But the cute little dove he kept in his cage would be worth the sin. Pretty and young. Virtue itself. But get her in your bed and you'll be glad to see another morning. You can tell just by looking at her!
Janosh: She Ruthard's daughter, you pig. No hostage, she on our side!
Adder: All the better! We're her saviours. If she's well-bred, she should repay us all.
Henry: Is he talking about Rosa?
Janosh Uher: Ehh? He just say she is… very fine lady. No more!
So although Janosh willingly listens and jokes with Adder about widely understand sex, there are moments he does not appreciate his friend’s sexual libido and won't play along.
So far, my impression of Janosh is that he rarely mentions sex in regard to his own person but through the game jokes and talks with Adder about sex or talks about Adder’s sex life on different occasions.
And because Janosh and Adder are inseparable for most of the story events and thus have a lot of screentime together, I’m leaving their interaction for the next part.
I didn't choose this answer option before (but how can Henry say he can do without Hans, when he's been obsessively trying to get him back all trip) but actually the answer surprised me pleasantly, he liked it even more than the approving "we need Capon". This is his "If you wanna, go and see Jitka", oh gods, Henry sounds very jealous (this is a little revenge for all those moments when Hans made Henry jealous).
Yes, I have to sacrifice a little of my reputation with Hans, but he has to remember that Henry also has feelings and a limit to his patience, and he can also act like a bitch lol😝
Meanwhile, Hans shows his character and speaks firmly "And l've made my min up!" He even embarrassed Botschek. I'm proud of Hans!
i'm fascinated by the implications of multiple unconnected npcs assuming henry is either demonic in nature, or satan himself in kcd2. there's the latin-speaking dice player who assumes henry is the demon he summoned in the past to play chess against, the inquisitor who accuses him of dark sorcery, the peasant who tries to summon satan at the crossroads and gets henry instead, and, of course, the interaction with bellissimo, the sole time (that i know of) that henry can enter into a conversation knowingly taking on the guise of satan from the start.
are these assumptions simply meant as a somewhat humorous look into the medieval mindset of these characters? i don't deny it was funny the first couple of times he was deemed satanic when my henry was in the midst of doing little sidequests to help people all across the countryside, but the third random encounter got me thinking, and the bellissimo quest in the dlc really made me wonder how intentional the devs are being with drawing parallels between henry and demons. they're all very cool interactions, but i do think a devout henry would end up with some kind of complex from the constant association of him with demons, and at the least i think he'd start reflecting on his own quest for revenge and just how much blood he's willing to spill after the second or third time he was viewed as demonic by a total stranger.
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Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about how “Hans kissed first” and how my favorite Hansry head cannon is that they both were aware of their feelings for one another, but Henry had fully accepted the fact that these were feelings he likely will never act on, due not only to historical context and the implications and consequences therein related to homosexuality/social status/etc., but also the fact that he absolutely treasures his friendship with Hans. And to try to act on his feelings but have something go wrong (they’re not reciprocated, they’re outed/found out, the romance goes wrong, etc), he could lose his “family” all over again. And! He hadn’t gotten enough back from Hans to have any explicit idea that his feelings were even remotely reciprocated. I’m sure he had an awareness that the likelihood of Hans feeling the same way was so infinitesimally small, so he had completely written off the possibility.
It always felt to me like Henry was desperate for Hans to understand that he loved him, even though he never expected anything in return. He finds these increasingly emphatic ways to express his feelings to Hans, but, to me, it does’t ever feel like a prelude to him trying to make a move. There’s a beautiful and exquisite tension in that unrequited longing, and I think that’s why Hansry feels more both impactful and more like a true love story than the other romances in either game. In that context, the Hans-kisses-Henry-first thing is just *perfection* because it subverts the RPG romance mechanic in a way that feels so right.
Something new struck me when thinking about Hans on the gallows at Trosky. And it's rooted in the idea that the relationship between Henry and Hans feels so real and grounded because they are such incredible complements to one another, particularly in regard to courage/selflessness vs. selfishness/self-indulgence. This might seem like a bit of a birdwalk, so bear with me...
The first time that Hans speaks during this WHOLE sequence is at this point, after Henry interjects. From the time he is taken from his cell and led to the gallows, he doesn't speak a word. And we can guess the things he's feeling - guilt, shame, shock, anguish, and like all hope is lost. But Henry? Henry never gave up on Hans, or on saving his life. And Hans's demeanor shifts completely and immediately after Henry appears with Captain Thomas - he FINALLY finds the strength, courage, and resolve to speak up for himself.
Moving much later in the story, to the siege of Suchdol, I've seen a lot of comparisons between KCD1 Hans volunteering Henry during the Talmberg night raid and KCD2 Hans volunteering to go with Sam and Henry to try to reach Jobst to bring reinforcements:
But I think it's important not to forget that before Sam and Henry volunteer, Hans merely says:
So even at this stage in the story, Henry's bravery and selflessness is still what is inspiring Hans to find his own courage.
That is beautiful on its own, but I feel it's only half of a very important exchange between the two of them. Because though it may be easy to criticize Hans's frivolity and self-indulgence, I think those traits are a perfect counter-balance for Henry, who is perpetually self-sacrificing to help those around him. And sure enough, in the very next scene, after Hans recounts the tale of Lancelot and Galehaut, Henry reassures him that he'll be back and stands up to leave, clearly conflicted concerning his focus on the mission, his feelings for Hans, and the implication of everything that is hanging in the air. But it's Hans who can't let his feelings go unexpressed at this point, no matter what is at stake. This feels like the very best kind of selfishness, to me. Because while it was Henry’s emotional courage that created this space of vulnerability in the first place, it’s Hans's selfishness in that moment that allows them to finally act on their feelings.
I'm currently obsessed with this idea that Istvan and Erik bring out the worst in Henry, while Hans repeatedly brings out the best in him.
In my view, nowhere is Henry more hateful, cruel, and impulsive than when he is facing off against Istvan and Erik. Of course this makes a lot of sense - his experiences at Vranik and Talmberg would still be quite fresh for him. And, Istvan particularly loves goading Henry on. He taunts Henry with Radzig's/Martin's sword both the last time Henry sees him in KCD1 and the first time Henry comes face to face with him in KCD2. So, I'm not saying that it is surprising or even unearned that Istvan (and subsequently Erik) stir up these feelings in Henry, but I do think that this is part of a huge thematic aspect of both Henry's journey and his relationship with Hans.
KCD can be so unserious, funny, and lighthearted at times that it's easy to forget that the deep trauma and the events of the first game are still so fresh for Henry. I believe his shame of having run from Skalitz plants this seed of fear that he will give up his agency and his power if he turns away from his adversaries. In my eyes, this fear gets folded into his desire for revenge and can so quickly twist his focus and his motivations. But, at the same time, there is such a beautiful, blossoming foil to these tendencies in Henry: Hans.
In KCD2, you can, of course, immediately kill Istvan once you reach him in the tower in Trosky. But Istvan is so charismatic and compelling in a certain way that I, personally, couldn't pass up the chance to talk to him. If you choose to have a conversation with him, you can threaten Erik's life and intimidate Istvan into begging Henry to spare him. This is so interesting to me at this point in the story because it does feel like Erik, while not innocent by any means, is mostly collateral damage in this adversarial relationship that Henry and Istvan have. The option to threaten Erik, especially when you have Istvan cornered with really no hope of escape, feels like sheer hate, cruelty, and merely for the pleasure of watching Istvan grovel. If you kill him dishonorably at this point, his line "So what's it going to be? A fair fight? ...or are you finally going to learn?" hits SO hard - has Henry's hate and thirst for revenge twisted him into becoming not so unlike his adversaries?
As the story progresses, Erik becomes the recipient of this cruelty as he transforms into much more than "evil-by-association." At every opportunity, Henry reminds that he killed Istvan and that he would jump at the chance to do the same to Erik. I don't believe Henry would meet Erik for a duel if he wasn't intent on continuing to watch Erik suffer. Again, there are lots of reasons why this is the case, including the horrors of Erik's actions and choices in the latter part of the game. Additionally, I do know the duel is a fully optional confrontation (and Hans even tells Henry he wishes he wouldn't accept), but I feel the game and the narrative was designed to make you really want to accept, despite it being something that honestly feels like a very selfish and indulgent choice. Beforehand, Zizka advises Henry how helpful it can be to taunt your opponent to get them off balance, so it might be easy enough to write off these choices of Henry's as battle tactics, but, personally? I don't believe it's that simple. It truly feels like he wants to hurt Erik, he wants him to feel the pain of his grief and loss and remind him that it was Henry who caused it. He wants Erik to feel like he's nothing. Again, you don't have to choose these dialogue options. You could just jump into the fight, but once again, I feel like the narrative so easily guides you to engage in this way.
On the flip side of all this, I contend that never is Henry more focused, determined, and selfless than when it comes to Hans. Even in their divorce era, Henry is constantly asking folks all over Trosky if they've seen him. We've all experienced those bells tolling, counting down to Hans's planned execution while Henry is frantically trying to find a way to save Captain Thomas's life so he can prevent the execution. He later goes to great lengths to assist the Ruthards with collecting blackmail material on Ulrich Vavak just so he can rescue Hans while he is being told more than once that there's sort of no reason to do so. In both of these instances, he is helping not only Hans, but his actions save lives and/or assist his allies in not-insignificant ways.
And let's not forget the timing of the culmination of their romance storyline - the last thing that Henry does before heading into the Praguers camp is to say goodbye to Hans. At this point, his friendship with Hans has already become so centered in his life, that even if Hans didn't kiss him, it feels like Hans is this galvanizing force for Henry's drive to set off on what is essentially suicide mission. However, I feel like it's SO meaningful that after he and Hans finally make their feelings for one another clear (and act on them in such a powerful and beautiful way), finding and killing Markvart Von Aulitz becomes an optional part of the story. This is wild to me especially in light of the fact that getting revenge against Von Aulitz is a main quest for the ENTIRETY of KCD1. And, yes, I know most players probably still seek out Von Aulitz and then make choices from there about how he dies. But at that point, revenge transforms from Henry's primary motivation into an optional part of a quest undertaken for the greater good. And THAT is both beautiful game design and storytelling.
Istvan has so many iconic and memorable lines in KCD2, but one that stands out is "Revenge doesn't give a life meaning, it's just childish nonsense. It won't feed you. You can't fuck it." And, to me, this is one of the greatest and most poignant truths in the game. In my experience of Henry's story, it is ultimately Hans that gives him that meaning, motivation, and a reason to turn away from the darkest tendencies within himself.
