#katherinep

"I wanna read chat," you smile, moving away from the island to grab your phone sitting on the dining table across from you.

"You just don't wanna cut the onions," Alex replies with a sarcastic scoff.

"Yeah, I don't," you reply, grabbing your phone off the table from under his.

You just barely nudge the camera and take a moment to turn it back to place before returning to the island, standing beside Alex as he begins peeling an onion. You pull up the stream on your phone, leaning on the island, putting a few feet between you both since you knew in a minute the onion gas would have you rolling on the floor in pain.

You snort, throwing a hand over your mouth to contain your laughter while Alex raises an eyebrow in confusion.

"Someone said you're my malewife making me a meal before I get home from my blue collar job," you explain, setting your phone down to giggle with your hands over your face.

Alex tries to fight a laugh before looking up at the camera, "Guys, how am I a malewife?! Just because I'm cutting up an onion? Also, Y/n would never work blue collar."

"Yes I would!" you exclaim, jaw slacked, "I'm a hard worker!"

His eyes narrow, "You wouldn't last a day in construction."

You take a moment of silence to think. You silently agree, moving on to find more comments to read. Chat seemed more focused on other things, so you move to Instagram comments on his page. Usually, they comment the most unhinged shit, so you should be able to find some funny comments.

"I found one," you cackle, showing Alex the photo where you found this comment, "Bro looks like if Minecraft Steve and a villager had a baby."

"What the fuck?!"

You fall to the floor in humorous tears, holding your stomach. That's when the onion gas reaches you, blinding you, leaving you trapped in pain and laughter while Alex playfully yells at chat. You rub your eyes, trying to stop the burning, but it feels like it's only getting worse.

Alex takes notice of your behavior and your little 'ow''s, his brows turning down in worry. He watches as you scramble to your feet and stumble to the sink, patting around for a towel and the faucet with your eyes shut tight. Tears roll down your cheeks as you groan, calling out to him.

"Alex, holy shit, just put the onion on the stove!"

He quickly follows your demands, sliding the chopped onion into the pan on the stove. It crackles and sizzles as he uses the knife to slide it all off the cutting board. He sets the board and knife down, then turns to you.

"You okay?-"

"No-" you groan, grabbing at your eyes, "Cold water on a towel, it helps."

Alex bites back a laugh, smile evident, especially to the stream, as he turns on the cold water and reaches under the sink to grab a towel. He moderately soaks the towel before grabbing one of your hands, silently alerting you that your aid was here.

You slam the cold towel against your eyes, freeing yourself of misery with a sigh.

"Are you gonna make a full recovery?" he asks.

"Maybe. I'm not sure. I might be permanently blind."

You watch as Alex looks to you for measurements with the sauces. You have much more knowledge in this dish than he does. He is not eyeballing and potentially wasting thirty dollars worth of food for twelve people.

For context, you're just streaming cooking a meal while some friends are traveling from an airport about two hours away to your home. They're visiting, and yes, you're cooking for twelve. There'll be six of you total and enough for seconds or leftovers if need be. You set up a vote, and the winning dish was stir fry, so here you are, making it, trying to get it done before they arrive.

You jokingly snatch the bottle of soy sauce from him, then show him how to apply. You lightly drizzle in a swirling pattern before setting the glass bottle down. "Now stir it up how I showed you."

He follows your orders, watching as you add some sesame seeds and pour in the fried eggs after, all while he's still mixing. He watches intently, trying to remember everything you're doing to try and make this again, alone, potentially as a surprise. He's making mental notes that he'll hopefully actually be able to remember.

"Looks good, babe," you smile cheekily, leaning against the counter beside him, "You're a professional chef now."

He quickly looks away with a smile, feeling his cheeks warm up. Even after years of being together, he still gets flustered with your pet names. He isn't sure why, but he feels he never really left the honeymoon stage.

"But," you continue, "Eyeball, taste, eyeball, taste. That's the go-to. No measurements. Just... see how it tastes, honestly." you tell him, grabbing a small spatula from the kitchenware jar on the counter next to the stove. You use it to pick up a small scoop of the rice before fountaining it into your mouth. You nod as you chew, "Lowkey, that's awesome."

"Can I try?"

You hand the spatula to him and move to the island, grabbing your phone after you hear it buzz. Your friends are pulling up. You set your phone back down and turn, seeing him practically eating straight from the pan. You contain a laugh while you stand on your tippy-toes, reaching up to grab a large bowl from the cabinet over the fridge.

"They're here, put everything in this bowl and fold it again how I showed you."

He nods, taking the bowl once you manage to grab it. You rush to the door, nearly falling on your way, to unlock it and allow your guests in as you see headlights illuminate the windows next to the door. You hear Alex squeak, and looking back, you notice he dropped a little bit of the food on the floor. A small chicken cube and a couple grains of rice, basically. Nothing to fret over.

You hug your guests as they enter, informing them that dinner is almost ready. Your return to the stream, allowing them to say hello to chat and to help Alex with the heavy ass pan and pot of veggies.

"Holy shit, how long have you guys been cooking?" your one friend questions, "Your stream is like, four hours now."

You and Alex both laugh.

"We've only been actually cooking for two," you explain, "We did a lot of fooling around."

"So that explains the raw cookie dough platter?"

"And why Tiger is hiding under the couch. Alex dropped a pan and scared her."