#jyll

Max was having a nightmare, that much he knew very well, but he also knew that there wasn’t a damn thing he could do to stop it. Paralyzed with fear and sorrow, he had to watch it play out before him, like he was usually forced to do when this dream popped up.

 Jylliana and Lachlan stood there, beautiful as they always were but their faces wiped clear of their usual smiles and tender looks. Eyes, which were always bright and happy, were hard and full of a mixture of hatred and absolute disgust. Their hands were intertwined, and he reached out his hand to join them, but Jyll slapped his reach away, pulling the Orc closer to her body to protect him from the monster in front of them.

 And that’s the chant that he heard in his head. Monster, monster, monster, monster. Not because of his race, but because of who he was, and all the things he had been forced to do when he had been powerless and looking for a way to get out. So much blood and anguish from his hands, no wonder they turned away from them. He didn’t deserve them, didn’t deserve a single touch. He deserved to be alone, away from everyone, so he could hurt no one again. He had to stay away from them, before they ended up suffering because of him-

 A rough shove against his shoulder forced Max awake, his eyes shooting open as his breathing turned ragged and copied the rapid beating of his heart. It took him a second to regain his thought, remind himself where he was and who he was with. He blinked a couple times to bring Jyll’s face into focus, even though she was wrapped in his arms and almost as close as she could possibly be to him. Lachlan’s hand, which was resting against Max’s shoulder, pulled away once he could tell that he’d awoken him from his nightmare.

 “Are you okay?” the Half-Orc asked, worry radiating off of him in waves. When he didn’t answer, Jyll put her hand against his cheek, caressing her thumb against the scruff of his unshaved face.

 “You were having a nightmare. You were whimpering like a puppy in your sleep. Do you want to talk about it?”

 “Not really,” he forced an unconvincing laugh, “It’s silly.”

 “Not if it’s causing you harm it’s not,” Lachlan dismissed, walking around the bed until he could sit next to Max, his large arms instinctively wrapping around his waist as he buried his face into Max’s neck. Usually, that would have been enough of an invitation to initiate another round for the three of them, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to convince them to leave this in the past so he could fuck them for the third time that night. Sighing, he let one arm rest against Lachlan’s arms as his other hand moved in circles on Jyll’s bare thigh.

 “Sometimes the weight of everything I’ve gone through just pushes up out of the dark and reminds me of all the bad things I’ve done and makes me wonder if I deserve any of the good things I have in my life right now. Including the two of you.”

 He closed his eyes tightly, not used to letting out any negative emotions that had to do with him, or sharing this much about himself without being forced to do so. But with the looks they had been giving him, that was enough force to give them whatever they wanted.

 “It’s just been… so long since I’ve had anything or anyone that meant so much to me that I could just reach out and touch with my hand. I’ve spent such a long time alone or surrounded by enemies that I wonder when the hat is going to drop and you two… leave me.”

 Jylliana’s hands cupped his face, pulling him closer so that she could rest her forehead against his own. He opened his eyes, but saw that hers were closed, with a bit of moisture gathered at the corners.

 “Max, we’re not going to leave you. Unless we all decide to mutually go our separate ways, I will always, always proudly call you my boyfriend and partner.”

 “Max,” Lachlan chimed in, his voice a little muffled since he was still nestled into the wolf man’s neck, “You’ve been with us so long now, I don’t know what my life would be like without you. I don’t want to imagine it, and I won’t ever let it happen. We’ll be by your side, always.”

 “I believe you guys. The thoughts don’t usually occur to me when you’re both this close, where I can touch you and kiss you to remind myself that I have you.”

 “Then kiss us and touch us all you want,” the other man stated, moving his head so he could look at his two partners, “I, um. I don’t mind, even when we’re around people. I kind of, uh, like it. Actually.”

 Tempting little minx, that boy was. Max leaned in to kiss his temple, enjoying the little blush that lit up his face.

 “I mean, as long as we’re not on a mission or in a life or death situation I don’t mind being touched or kissed by you either, because obviously I love kissing you, both of you, so how am I supposed to say no to either of my boyfriends, especially when you look at me like that, yeah, like that, I just turn into a blubbering mess and I’m doing it right now so please kiss me and just shut me up.”

 Max pressed his lips against Jyll’s, though the chaste kiss was interrupted by his soft chuckles and he made sure to do as she asked. When he pulled away, the woman was flushed, but she was happy. As he smiled at both of them, he was sure he must look like an idiot, but he didn’t care. He just cared for these two flustered idiots so much.

 “Let’s go back to bed. God knows what we’re going to do tomorrow.”

 “Then let’s sleep like this,” Lachlan suggested, wiggling down from his sitting position to lay down, still kind of awkwardly holding Max, “If you’re in the middle, you can touch us both easier.”

 Max blinked at him, and was surprised when Jyll silently agreed to the plan by lying back down, moving a little to take Lachlan’s previous spot. Leaving a small space for him between the middle of their bodies.