#justallisticthings

"Okay, I have an idea. We'll find a sign to tell you to stop talking when you should. You like [special interest], right? We'll do [completely misunderstood thing kinda related to special interest]."

“My [son/daughter/child] with autism“

Your diagnosis is just an excuse to not do things that you don’t want to do!!! What do you mean you “can’t” do them??? I can do them and I’m not even trying that hard!!!

You’re applying for disability? But you can work with kids!!! Sounds like you’re just giving up.

Mom after diagnosis: Pretends I don't exist, forces me to be in uncomfortable situations, "come on, [name]! Even though I have memory problems too, having a list is unnecessary! Now, do all your chores in alphabetical order in thirty minutes, something no human being can do, because clearly being autistic means you can do all this better than everyone!! Why aren't you talking?? Grounded lol!"

(about a special interest) "But you're never going to be able to make a career out of that!"

in the dog voice ™: “Nice job saying hello”

"You can't be autistic. My friend's toddler was just diagnosed, and you're nothing like that."