Top Posts Tagged with #junseo angst

Junseo thought that he would never have trouble running out of time due to his special ability, but he couldn't turn back time when he needed it the most.

➳ Characters: time traveller!Junseo x female!reader/you

➳ Genre: time travel au, slice of life, angst

➳ Words: 4k

➳ Warning: one mention of a family member's death

➳ A/N: This story is part of my '5 words, 5 stories' series for which I wrote 5 totally different stories with 5 different band members featuring the same 5 words "I'm sorry, I love you". If you're interested in the other stories, check out this link! Otherwise, they can totally be read on their own. Dedicated to @dat-town ❤️

➳ Check out: my WEi masterlist

➳ WEi taglist: @dat-town, @effulgentfireflies, @hyu-won, @littlestartonightsposts, @ishuayou

You were the happiest and most nervous person on Earth these past few weeks. You were delighted because you were about to marry the man of your dreams, the one who had mended your broken heart, and the one who showed you that you were still worthy of love, of attention. You had been together for 3 years now, and you wouldn’t have changed anything about these past few years. Some might say that you were about to get married too soon, but you didn’t think that it was too soon. You had both been working by the time you had met, you had your own responsibilities and challenges, but you had overcome the worries of career orientation during uni years and you had already been living together for a year, managing a household together.

Besides, you would have never questioned his love for you. He was more on the reserved side just like you, but somehow, you two managed to open up to each other, even after your hurtful experiences in love prior to meeting each other. You two could talk about deep topics just as much as you could fight over the options to watch on Netflix, and he cared, he cared deeply, that much you could tell even if he failed his attempts at baking a cake and once he even set an apron on fire.

He made you laugh so many times with his silly antics and childish whimpering, and he made your heart race whenever he stood up for you. He was also never hesitant whenever you asked him if a dress fit you, or when he heard you talk negatively to yourself. He had this duality of being able to talk sense into you when you doubted yourself, but he was also the same person who managed to walk into a lamp once when he didn’t look up from his phone. He was also the one who took it upon himself to clean the whole flat for two days straight (it took him two because he said he was always distracted by something) while you were away on a solo trip, and he was also the one who broke his toe while playing video games (too vehemently) one night.

All of these memories made you smile and feel touched even up to this day, and even though you would have never thought that you would be able to love someone else after your previous boyfriend had broken your heart, he showed you that you could love someone else just as much as you could learn to love yourself.

Despite all the happiness, you were also really nervous because it was a big day, and you wanted everything to go well. You couldn’t take as much time off work as you had wanted because you took those off for the honeymoon instead, so it meant that you spent a lot of nights discussing the different menu options and putting together lists of whom to invite and whom not to. Thankfully though, you didn’t argue a lot of times, so the preparation went smoothly given the circumstances.

However, you had this odd feeling that someone had been following you these past few days. You didn’t actually see anyone odd around the block or around your workplace (a few figures wearing all black couldn’t say anything given that a lot of people wore black in general) but there was this eerie feeling that crept into your heart, and you really felt like someone had been watching you. So you were always super relieved when Yongha came home after work, and this unsettling feeling could evaporate, at least until the next day.

However, when someone knocked on your flat’s door, you didn’t expect a visitor, you merely assumed that your fiancé had left his keys at home (just like he sometimes did, it wasn’t unheard of).

Who showed up at the door instead was someone you hadn’t seen for 5 years.

“Junseo…” You whispered, his name rolling off your tongue in a fragile fall. He had the same round, warm, chestnut-brown eyes, the slick jawline, the adorable dimples and the strong build with his wide shoulders and fit body, but his gaze was weary, almost helpless, and your heart immediately sank.

You wanted to tell him how much you had suffered because of him (and how much you had missed him) when you would see him again, but the words died on the tip of your tongue when he just showed up that day, something clearly tormenting him because he didn’t have the usual sparkles in his eyes. The ones that you fell in love with…

You wanted to find a part-time job for yourself to be able to pay towards your tuition fees despite your parents supporting you whole-heartedly. You wanted to do as much as you could to not depend on them, and you wanted to start that as soon as possible, but finding a part-time job close to campus that wasn’t already occupied and wasn’t a waitress position at a café where you had to actively talk to people and serve them… well, it was tough.

However, just as you were about to give up hope, you found a job ad for a librarian assistant position at the uni board, and decided to try your luck. You got it, and it paid well, and even though you had to be there at odd hours to open and close the library early morning and at nights to assist the librarian lady, you didn’t mind. You didn’t even have to talk to people all the time, and they weren’t usually very chatty, just handing books back or coming to rent books.

One morning, you offered to bring a newly arrived set of books inside the library instead of the librarian who had a back surgery not too long ago, so it was better if you handled it. At least, you thought so, but as you were about to cross the space between the front door and the information desk, you managed to trip and fall, the books flying around you in all directions.

You looked around, ashamed, because you were passing by beside the study desks. You caught sight of a girl who rolled her eyes before turning back to her book and a boy who put his earphones in after seeing you fall. You mouthed a sorry as your eyes met a gentle pair of orbs, warm like a cosy tea of a fall night and sparkling like the clear night sky during summer without any clouds.

Bathing in embarrassment, you turned back to the mess in front of you, and started gathering the books. As you were reaching for a psychology-related one, you saw someone crouching down beside you, and when you looked up, you looked into the same warm brown eyes than before.

“Oh, I can manage, don’t worry. You can go back to studying,” you mumbled immediately because you didn’t want to inconvenience him.

“It’s okay. I was just about to finish anyway,” he justified gently, and you felt like when you looked into his eyes, you saw tiny stars in them. His eyes were so beautiful, but the dimpled smile that he gave you was even more beautiful. You had to force yourself to snap out of it and go back to your business aka picking up the books.

The boy diligently helped you with them, and when he didn’t hand you the books, but had his own pile and started walking towards the information desk, you followed him in awe. Gosh, this boy was really polite and well-mannered, not even letting you go back to the desk alone with the books, but helping you out.

“Thank you so much,” you shared gratefully as you put your own pile of books on the desk beside the ones he had picked up. Then, you turned towards him, a vivid smile playing on your lips.

“You shouldn’t carry too much at once. You might throw your back out,” he warned you gently like a caring friend, but hearing that, the librarian lady - who had already been sitting in her chair behind the desk, you just totally forgot about her presence - spoke up.

“Tell me about it, young boy,” she snickered, one of her hands immediately reaching for her back. “You can come and work for the library, too. We can do with more helping hands,” she suggested in a very casual way that was so in contrast to her usual grumpy mood. Huh, the boy must have had a good first impression on her as well.

“Ah… well…”

“Go, give him a flyer,” the librarian ordered you even though she could have easily reached for the job advertisement flyers on the desk herself. Either way, you got one of the papers, and gave it to the boy, hoping that it would satisfy Mrs Kim’s fussiness.

“Thank you,” he responded, well-mannered as always, but he probably felt the odd atmosphere between the three of you (or he didn’t want to stand there awkwardly under the gaze of the elder woman), and bid his goodbye, saying something along the lines of ‘see you soon.’

You looked after him as he sat back to his desk, and your lips curled upwards. You had no idea then that it would be this exact boy who would make your heart race and break it as well, that he would be the first boy whom you let close to you, who can see your silly side with your random singing sessions when drunk, who can hear your minute-long laughter when you watch a romcom together in the cinema as your first date, who can shade you from the sun when you’re outside, who can use all of his strong build and graceful height to help you place books on the shelves in the library or help you with your grocery bags when going back to the dorms, who can wipe your tears when a family member passes away, who can be happy with you when you pass an exceptionally difficult exam, and who can look after you when you get sick.

You might not have known then, but you felt it… That for you, it was definitely love at first sight.

“Junseo…” You breathed out, your voice coming out quieter than you had intended.

“Hi!” He greeted you almost coyly, almost like the first time you had met, and your heart betrayed you because it did skip a beat when he smiled at you like that. As if nothing had changed, as if you had actually seen each other these past few years, as if you had still been in love.

Love, what a painful word it had been for you because of him. You had to remind yourself of all the agony and doubt of the past 5 years to be able to resist his charms.

“What are you doing here?”

Your voice was stern this time, but not angry. You were partly curious why he was there and partly cautious. After all, you had no idea what might have happened since you had last seen each other, he might have changed for the worst. Even if his eyes hadn’t changed, his heart might have.

“I… I just wanted to see you… and talk maybe?” Junseo half-asked, half-said, the words rolling off his tongue like a game of chess - one moment he seemed confident like he knew what was his next move and the other he started doubting his plan.

You felt the same way: no matter how many happy moments you had shared in the past, you still resented him. He showed up when you thought that you had finally managed to pick yourself up from the ground and forget about him and your time together, and you were so, so happy beside Yongha, so why… Why did he have to show up a few days before your wedding?

“We haven’t seen each other for 5 years. You haven’t even contacted me during this time. What could we possibly talk about?”

“Look, I’m so sorry. I can explain, I can really do so,” he pleaded, his sparkly eyes turning stormy, stars covered by the clouds of his night sky. His whole expression was so genuine, so sincere, you wanted to believe that he had a reasonable excuse, but 5 years… It was too long of a time for you to forget.

“Junseo, I’ve been so confused all these years because you just left one day and I didn’t see you afterwards. I thought that you died or something…” Your voice faltered at this point because really, you even thought about that. “If you had been worried about the idea of us moving together, you could have just told me instead of being all happy about it and then leaving the next day.”

The memory still stung, it was like a wound that you kept scratching and scratching, so it could never heal. Somehow, your brain always went back to the memories of his vivid smiles, the light sound of his giggle, the stars in his eyes, the comfort you felt beside him, the safety he felt in his arms, and the way his hand fit so perfectly into yours. You were still a prisoner of your time together, and you knew that you could only put an end to it if you moved on, and maybe his explanation could ease your nerves a bit, but still… What if he was here to want to start everything again?

As if reading your mind, the boy clarified why he was there.

“I’m so sorry, I truly am. That’s exactly why I wanted to come and talk to you. I want to explain the whole thing because you deserve the truth. I will explain, and I will leave. You don’t have to see me again.”

Despite the obvious - you wanted the same -, you needed a few seconds to be able to pull yourself together to croak out an ‘okay’ and let him inside.

It was odd, letting him inside the home you shared with Yongha, in a part of the city you had always told Junseo that you would like to live in one day. You didn’t bother offering a drink or showing him around because you felt like he was an unexpected guest despite him being all too familiar. You had a feeling you (and your heart) were better off if you cut it short, so you led him to the couch in the living room, and sat down beside him - in a safe distance. Safe for you, so you wouldn’t feel like you were too intimate and safe for your heart because you wouldn’t have that urgent need to grab his hand and take it into yours.

No, gosh, that would be so wrong…

“So… I don’t really know where to start…” Junseo admitted with a nervous giggle as he scratched the back of his neck. It was a habit of his that you had grown to love, but now it was a jarring feeling to realise that you had already forgotten about this sight in the past few years when it had been something you had cherished before.

“So you already knew that sometimes I was away for a week or so, or you couldn’t contact me for a few days.”

“Yeah, I remember,” you told him firmly as you remembered back to the times he had told you that he would go on trips or help out his grandparents in the countryside. You didn’t think of it as anything bad since you weren’t so hung up on your phone either, and you could still write to him and send voice notes and he would get back to you upon his return.

“Well, going on trips and helping out my grandfather wasn’t exactly true. I went on trips… but in time… and my grandfather helped me with it because it’s a hereditary thing. My family can go back and forward in time.”

You were sure you looked dumbfounded enough for Junseo to continue without taking a break because he explained that the male side of his family had this gift or curse (depending on how you looked at it) for generations, and they could use it for good - one of his distant relatives a few decades back helped to put an end to a war too -, but it had its consequences and limitations. Junseo’s father, for instance, had not been seen for two years prior to meeting you because he might have gotten stuck in a different timeline and couldn’t escape or didn’t want to. A lot of times they didn’t even know their limit because going back to the past or time travelling to the future consumed a lot of their energy - that’s why he seemed so weary sometimes when you thought he had just been studying too much -, and that’s exactly what happened to him.

“I got stuck in the future, and now this is where we meet. I have been in this timeline for a few months now, but I didn’t know how to approach you after I saw your post online about getting married with someone other than me,” he explained without breaking the eye-contact, yet despite his confident tone, you could sense the jealousy permeating his words.

To be frank, you were shocked, but the more he explained about it, the more the puzzle pieces fell together. After all, there were these odd little things about him that you had never really paid much attention to - just like the weariness and the lack of contact for a few days -, but you would have never thought that it was the reason for it. After what he had told you, instances that he had brought up, pictures that he showed on his phone from an even farther future, you wanted to believe him. You asked a lot of questions too, and he answered them, but still, the one that was the most burning was…

“But why did you want to go to the future after that night? Did you have to go? Did your grandfather tell you?”

“I wanted to see if we were able to live together afterwards,” he told you immediately, and now you knew that he hadn’t forgotten about the night you had last seen him. The night you had asked him whether he would like to move together from the next uni year. “But I guess I was greedy and went too much between timelines when I saw that we break up after living together because I still don’t tell you about my ability and then… I couldn’t really know where I was, and then I found myself here…”

The way he was speaking about it was confusing enough, so you had a feeling that it was confusing for him to live through it, and he tried to put together all these stitches of certain memories and timelines, but it didn’t fit because he kept going back and forth and it changed in the meantime.

Your heart crashed when he admitted that he had disappeared because of this: because he wanted to see if you had a future together. You needed a moment there to not shed tears. He went to see the future because of you, because he didn’t want to jump into it if he hurt you even more, and to think that he hurt you in the process nevertheless, but because of a totally different reason… It was just heartbreaking, all the realisations crashing down on you like a downpour.

“Why didn’t you go back to the past, to that night? Or did you attempt it?”

“I didn’t dare to because when I reached this timeline and I saw you happy, I didn’t want to go back again because I didn’t want to ruin what you have,” Junseo confessed gently, his voice less confident than before. You could hear the sentiment in his voice, you could see him fight the feelings because of his body language and you could feel his heart reach out for yours. For these fragile moments, you let your hearts connect. “Also, I would have risked not having met you, and I didn’t want that. As selfish as it sounds, I wished you would still remember in a way… I’m sorry.”

By this point, you felt like all he did was apologising. No matter how much you would have wanted him to come forward all these years and say sorry for how he had disappeared, now that you had it, you had him right in front of you, you wished you hadn’t been imagining such scenarios. After all, didn’t he leave because he cared for you, and wanted to avoid breaking your heart? You told yourself so many times that he had just played you, he had used you, he had realised you wanted more than him, but this… This wasn’t something he should have apologised for.

“No, it’s not selfish. It’s the opposite of it,” you insisted as you turned towards him with your whole body. You wanted him to look at you, to feel your sincerity, so you reached for his hand and squeezed it. Junseo looked up then, and when your eyes met, you let a teardrop escape your orbs as a bittersweet smile was making its way to your lips. He had made his choice, and so had you.

“Junseo, I… I’m sorry. I love you, but I don’t have space for you in my heart anymore. Not like before.”

You had to be honest with him because wasn’t dishonesty what had kept you apart and led to this very moment? He deserved to know your heart, he deserved to know it despite it possibly breaking his heart.

“I’m so sorry. I know I’m late, but I’m sorry,” he repeated like a broken record, and you just kept smiling at him with tears in your eyes, your hands in his, holding on for each other - something that you had been doing in the past few years but without the actual physical proximity.

You heard keys turning, and a few moments later, the door flew open and Yongha gave a cheery hello as he stepped inside. Instinctively, you let go of Junseo’s hand and wiped your tears away to go and greet Yongha with a smile. When your fiancé saw you, he asked if you were okay because your eyes were puffy, but you said that it was because of your allergies (you had teary eyes often due to pollen), and he accepted it.

However, before things would get awkward, you let him know that you had a visitor, and you introduced Junseo and Yongha to each other - your first love to your current love. It was an odd moment, but you had always referred to Junseo as an important part of your life instead of naming him as the boy who had broken your heart, and so Yongha didn’t look at him suspiciously. He greeted him like an old friend and suggested that he join you two for dinner. Junseo declined politely, but you couldn’t blame him.

Nonetheless, when Junseo left your flat that night, your heart wasn’t as heavy as before. It had been lighter than for the past few years, and even though there was a different boy who held you in his arms now, you were grateful for having met Junseo. He seemed to have sacrificed your future together in fear of breaking your heart, but maybe it was a lesson for him, too. That sometimes even with his special abilities, honesty was better than anything else.

A/N: I hope you enjoyed reading the fic despite all the angst! I had the idea for it after re-watching 13 Going on 30, and after @dat-town said that time travelling might be tale-like but she still likes it. So I hope you liked it, my dear (we suffer but we suffer together, you know). 🥰

As always, you can let me know what you thought through asks/DMs/reblogs. ❤️

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Hope you have a lovely day/night! Take care! ❤️

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