#jungwon reader

at first, jungwon was just another friendly face among many. you’d seen him in one of those post-exam chatting circles where absolutely no one had done well; your friends either discussing if they would fake amnesia about the grades or try to boost it by taking extra papers.

he was always smiling or giggling with those god damn dimples on display. sometimes he’d laugh while leaning on the shoulder of whoever was closest, and would never fail eye contact when someone spoke to him... still, you never expected your paths to cross so often. after all, the campus was huge, and your majors didn't overlap.

yet somehow, he was almost always there. at the open mic night, at the book fair organized by the literature students, at the theater showcases by the performing arts department... maybe it wasn’t even just his presence anymore, but the way your eyes naturally searched for him in every crowd. it was hard to pinpoint the exact moment when he stopped being just a handsome guy and became the guy you liked.

when your friends talked about romance and relationships, you listened more than you spoke, quietly wishing you could be as honest about your feelings as they were about theirs. and maybe… just maybe… you’d get a little help or advice that could somehow change your hopeless situation.

within the days passing by you found yourself more and more making ridiculous efforts not to wear your heart on your sleeve. from muffled screams into your pillow to running to the bathroom just to splash cold water on your face whenever it became impossible to focus on whatever the professor was explaining, especially if jungwon had greeted you with a brief wink; something he handed out like it meant nothing.

you even started choosing the most winding paths across the buildings, avoiding the central courtyard where you’d seen him hundreds of times before, sometimes on his phone, sometimes hurriedly reading some article.

it was becoming obvious. the more jungwon blended into your social bubble, the more you pulled away, like a mouse in a maze, finding exits, forcing gaps.

"i need to visit my parents this weekend” whenever they talked about renting an airbnb and spending a few days away.

“i'm completely broke” when they mentioned a cover band show in another city, where the whole group would go in a single car and who knows where they'd dump you.

all of it in the name of your sanity.

and you thought you were managing, till an ordinary friday, when your best friend caught you off guard in the café line, slipping an arm around you before pressing a quick kiss to your cheek. “party tonight. seven p.m. i'm picking you up at your dorm so we can go together”.

the invitation itself wasn’t unpleasant, but… “yeah? who’s going to be there?” you asked, casually, like someone checking the weather forecast.

“hmm… pretty much everyone from our major, and probably the usual flyers too, why?” she said, and you nodded.

“guess i will have to pass… i've got a lot to do and-” the excuse coming out automatically.

“huh? absolutely not. seriously, y/n, you’ve been bailing on every single plan lately. i’m not taking no for an answer today”. her tone was firmer besides her pouty lips. and after a few seconds of hesitation, you decided not to fight it.

***

it was just a kickback with people you saw all week long, only now with a little less clothing and more alcohol in the air. the place wasn’t new either: one of the senior guys’ studio apartment, where the city view was the real highlight… along with the fact that the building manager didn’t give a damn about the noise rule.

you greeted everyone with a small wave and smile before sticking with your bound. grabbed a drink, and sat on the arm of the couch, trying to blend into the background so you could do what you liked best: observe.

everything was normal. your friends talking loudly, and laughing contagiously. the reckless classmates making some unhealthy kind of bet involving a bottle of vodka, others debating over the music and playlists… but no sign of him.

what were you even expecting?

no one had said jungwon would be there. not that it was his responsibility, or that the two of you had anything to resolve. if he didn’t come, that was fine too… you definitely weren’t expecting anything, haha… probably better that way! you wouldn’t have to monitor yourself so closely, or feel like your heart was galloping while going absolutely nowhere.

you let out an audible sigh you hadn’t even realized you were holding, which caught the attention of the friend beside you. “what is it, pretty? bored?”

“i'd say that grumpy face has a first and last name...” added the boldest in the trio. you were quick to roll your eyes as she stuck out her tongue playfully.

“it’s nothing… just tired” you said lightly, changing the subject. “is there anything to eat?”

“i think so. they said there were some snacks in the kitchen.”

and so you went. standing up, adjusting the skirt you were wearing and rubbing at the tension on your neck. you walked into the next room, separated by an archway and a counter. When you found the containers with the appetizers, you brought one to your mouth, focusing on anything but the selfish feeling swelling in your chest.

you offered a closed-lip smile to a classmate that showed up just to grab a handful of crackers, and you stayed there, leaning against the counter.

could it get any more miserable?

just as you were getting ready to head back to your spot, sucking the seasoning off your fingers, the intercom buzzed. only once, not even long enough for anyone to turn and answer, but then… “oh thanks god, y/n. could you go downstairs and let jungwon in? he texted saying the front desk is empty".

the request felt like a snap right in your face, making your lips part. your body almost tipping forward as someone tossed the set of keys in your direction.

you didn’t said nothing. maybe because you were afraid you’d stutter if you tried to refuse. so instead, you just set your drink down and left the apartment, heading straight for the elevator.

what did you even like so much about yang jungwon when you barely spent any time together? how had your heart decided all of that on its own?

was it the way he spoke? all calm and confident making anyone listening feel safe? was it the way his hands were always so careful even with things that didn’t belong to him? or maybe your heart was just superficial, clinging to crescent-shaped eyes and stupid dimples. what if it was something more hormonal, more embarrassing like the way compression shirts clung to his broad shoulders, and how often he touched his perfect hair when he got distracted…? yeah... a complete mystery.

as you walked toward the building gate, whispering lines under your breath, rehearsing what you’d say after he said hi, he was there, arms crossed, gaze fixed on the street until the sound of your footsteps and the soft jingle of keys got his attention.

jungwon turned around and hit you with a slow smile and a casual hand through his hair before saying, “thought you were gonna leave me out here,” with a harmless little hint of drama.

and suddenly, it clicked. it wasn’t one thing. it was everything. all of it, at once.

you smiled before you could stop yourself, swallowing hard. “blame the ancient elevator,” you murmured, a shy curve to your lips while your fingers, unsteady, searched for the right key against the lock.

noticing your struggle, the yang waited a second before sliding his arm through the gaps in the gate, opening his hand. “let me help”, genuinely so considerate you wanted to dig a hole and jump on it.

“sorry…” you blurted out, embarrassment and frustration spilling over while he opened it and stepped inside, only turning back to pull it shut with a small thud. “it’s okay. that kind of thing happens all the time.”

you walked back toward the elevator together, jungwon holding the door open and gesturing for you to go first.

“so... they managed to get you out of the house, huh?” his question echoed inside the metal box as it practically crawled upward because of the old cables.

“what do you mean?” you looked up at him, not understanding at first.

“well i used to see you everywhere. campus, theater, café… and then suddenly, you vanished. i even started to think you were avoiding me,” he added with a light laugh, even though his tone didn’t quite hide the truth behind it.

you? avoiding him? i mean… yes. that was exactly it. but hearing it out loud from the very reason why made it sound even more pathetic.

you shook your head quickly, eyes dropping to your feet. “i got stuck with a research project, so i kinda disappeared for a while…” you lied shamelessly, following him toward the apartment door.

“really? which professor?” his voice was swallowed by the now loud music from inside as you guys entered.

“jungwon!!!” his friends called out excitedly in chorus.

and you were saved! not by angels, nor by heroes, but by drunk college dudes.

it felt like the air could move through your lungs again. you grabbed your drink once more and headed straight for the balcony, decorated with string lights and fake plants. the fact that jungwon remembered you at all was overwhelming… but at the same time, wasn’t he like that with everyone else?

the faint sound of music and laughter was comfortable from outside, same way vulnerable feelings like love, anxiety, uncertainty, were beautiful when portrayed in movies and books.

how long would you keep living life through other people, through other stories? how long would suffering over the uncertainty be more convenient than suffering because you actually tried? see… you didn’t consider yourself shy, a little introverted yes, but deeply dishonest with yourself.

after a few minutes out there, quiet, letting your thoughts boil your brain, the sliding balcony door opened behind you and they called you back to play a game.

most people were already sitting down, though not in any organized circle. your friends waved you over to sit with them again and jungwon looked at you. he was sitting on the floor, a beer bottle between his legs, leaning back on his hands.

“alright, everybody ready?” the apartment owner appeared holding two strips of fabric.

“i still think this game is sooo high school. what are we, fifteen?” a girl - a plus-one of a plus-one - complained. “it’s just for fun. unless you’ve got something to hide”.

“so… what are we actually playing?” you leaned in toward one of the girls, whispering into her ear.

“seven minutes in heaven or something like that” she answered, amused, her excitement bordering on preteen-level.

your own expression on the other hand was priceless. trying to understand how and why these people only ever dragged you into disasters whenever they were drunk.

“here’s how it’s gonna work…” the campus senior explained. “i put everyone’s name into an online randomizer and i'll draw two names at a time. but you have to keep your eyes closed until i finish putting the blindfolds on the chosen ones, ok? if anyone doesn’t want to play, speak now or forever hold your peace” he added, making everyone glance around at each other. no one backed out.

***

the first time you closed your eyes, you were terrified you’d be chosen, already imagining the awkward atmosphere with whoever it might be. your stomach twisted, your fingers crossing on instinct… you really didn’t want to go through the embarrassment of being alone with someone you barely knew.

the second time, you thought that if it were a friend or someone from your course, you could just talk, maybe even prank the rest of the group. it couldn’t be that bad… and if it was, it would only stay between you and that person. you felt less tense, even though your thumbs kept fidgeting against each other in your lap.

it was by the third time that realization hit. when jungwon muttered, “i gotta pee. if you can’t wait, just pick someone else" which earned a few quiet giggles from around the room.

as you opened your eyes, three people were missing. you knew you had no right to feel anxious about it, and yet… your traitorous heart wasn’t helping.

and, to be fair, the sounds coming from the closet in the hallway - where the pairs were being sent - were the worst. wet, suggestive sounds, the unmistakable sound of clothes brushing... you could never tell if it was real or just part of the act; everyone there loved a good show.

you only managed to relax when he appeared again, coming back from the bathroom, drying his hands on his jeans before sitting down on the floor once more.

“i'll draw someone to go with you” the host said and jungwon agreed quietly.

once again, you closed your eyes. tense, anxious, desperate to know who would end up with him. if it were a close friend, it’d be funny. if it were one of your friends… unlikely that anything would happen. but if it were anyone else what was your guarantee? or rather… why the hell did you think you deserved one? poor thing, just didn’t wanted to end the night crying like a baby later.

seconds felt like centuries. you even started to feel dizzy.

“i'm putting the blindfold on now, okay?” that whisper made the entire world drop into slow motion.

shit. this was really happening.

shit, shit, shit.

the satin slid over your eyes, and you felt every loop of the knot tightening behind your head. you were helped to your feet. groping cautiously at the air in front of you, guided toward the built-in closet along the wall. hands at your sides helped you over the small step between the floors, and the darkness you already saw turned into complete black.

it would’ve been silent too, if you couldn’t hear your own heartbeat.

after the dry click of the lock, the blindfolds could come off. you hesitated, fingers trembling, like you couldn’t quite trust reality. when the fabric finally slipped down around your neck, you saw jungwon standing right in front of you, his hand still lifted near your face.

"i was about to take it off for you,” he said softly.

inside that tiny space, you were closer than ever. smelling his cologne mixed with the mint of the gum he was chewing. for long seconds, you just looked at each other, your vision slowly adjusting to the dim light.

jungwon had always thought you were beautiful. since the very first day you were formally introduced. your eyes, mouth, the way you tried so hard not to bring attention to yourself and yet you were all he could ever notice when you were in the same place. he swore he had tried to get closer naturally, but you were skittish.

he assumed maybe you had a boyfriend already, and were focused on your studies. then he started wondering if he made you uncomfortable, that your personalities didn’t match. but the signs? it was undeniable that you wanted him. he just needed to know if you wanted him close or far away.

“so… what we were talking about earlier?” he resumed, glancing away for a split second as if searching for the thread of the memory. “about you starting a research project, right?” he confirmed, looking back at you, then dragging his tongue slowly across his bottom teeth. “it’s a good excuse, i won’t lie... do i believe it? not really.”

you swallowed hard. too stunned, too immersed in everything you were feeling. your brows drew together, lips parting in search of words. “but i- i didn’t-”

“you think you’re the only one who observes people?” he cut in calmly. “you think i don’t notice how your gaze always slips away? or how you pretend i'm not there? or even how, at the theater shows, you never refused to sit next to me but your fingers were always restless like right now?” the boy paused, glancing down at your hands where you were nervously fiddling with the bow on your blouse. you froze instantly, suddenly hyperaware, cheeks burning as he read you like an open book.

then jungwon took a step forward, and you took two steps back, bumping into one of the shelves and making it rattle loudly. he smirked.

“see? it doesn’t take much for you to show you’re trying to run” he said, biting his lip thoughtfully as he studied your expression. “but i want to know where this comes from. do you hate me? do you think i'm not worth of your time...?”

he leaned in closer, bracing himself against the cabinet behind you, one hand on either side of your body, effectively trapping you. your legs felt weak, your throat tight.

“tell me,” he asked. “if it’s any of those things, i promise i won’t bother you anymore…”

you shook your head faintly, the tension unbearable, turning your face away as you felt his breath near your jaw.

“then try to explain it to me,” the yang insisted. “you’ve been torturing me with this for months. why won’t you use your words, little mouse?”

“guys you have only one minute left!” someone called from outside. jungwon ignored it, still waiting.

"i just...”

“mhm? go on,” he encouraged, one brow lifting.

“please… jungwon…” you begged, shaking a little as you brought your hands up to hide your face.

“yes?” he whispered, gently catching your wrists and lowering them again, wanting to see your dazed expression; lost, shining eyes.

“hey, your time is do-” the folding door slid open, and just as quickly, jungwon pushed it shut again. “yeah, give us five more minutes”.

why was it so hard? your body was betraying you in every way. your mouth too dry, your chest burning, shame too heavy to speak. having a confession pulled out of you like this, stripping away all the careful armor you’d built, felt rough as fuck.

“i don’t know…”

“yes, you do…”

“we should go…”

and, in one final move, he leaned in just enough to whisper near your ear: “if i leave this closet without a clear answer, i'll assume you hate me. understand...? do you hate me, y/n?”

“never…” your voice wavered.

“then convince me”.

jungwon didn’t say anything else. he pulled back, eyes dragging over you from head to toe, as if trying to read something that refused to reveal itself. truth was, he wasn’t used to this. it usually came easily to him. the chemistry, the reactions, the way people folded into his orbit without much effort. it worked with everyone… except you.

what else did he have to do to win you over? what more did he need to trigger that perfect, instinctive response from you, something beyond this exhausting game of cat and mouse that had stretched on for far too long?

regardless all you gave him was silence.

“i get it” he clicked his tongue in frustration.

“wait…” your voice slipped out before you could catch it, and you looked at him with naked apprehension.

he had been about to open the doors again, but froze when he felt your hand gripping the hem of his shirt. those feline eyes snapped to you immediately like someone who, deep down, had been hoping.

“if i have to say it, then i’ll say it” gathering the last of courage you had. your lips moved on their own, tongue stumbling behind your teeth, as if your body were ready to speak before your mind was. “i like you… i really do- i mean… god”.

expression painfully honest. the tightness in your jaw, the gloss of your teary eyes, the way your nostrils flared, everything about you reporting just how far he had pushed you.

and just like this, before you could even process it, you were kissing.

Both his hands cradled your face as your mouths crashed together. his fingers slid down your shoulders, until he could lace them with yours. the kiss turned needy, reckless. a silent request for tongue while you both angled your heads. broken breaths when he ended up pressing you against the wooden panel behind you.

he only let go off your hands to hook his under your thighs, lifting you onto one of the drawers and stepping in between your legs.

“was it really that complicated?” he asked, pulling away just enough, reluctant, still trying to pull you closer by your hips.

“yes,” you admitted, and the sound that left him wasn’t quite a laugh, more like relief disguised as one.

jungwon was still fighting the urge to keep going when the upperclassman knocked again, this time with force. cursing under his breath, gave you one last look, then stepped back, fixing his hair and shirt before heading out.

“if i'd known you guys would need that much time, i would’ve lent you my room” the guy by the door joked.

“shut up,” the brunette said as he brushed past him, back to the living room and dropping into the same spot as before. he grabbed his beer and took a long sip.

you returned to your friends, who only stared at you in surprise, but didn’t push for details.

both of you pretending a normality that simply didn’t exist.

***

the rest of the night was made of stolen glances and restrained laughter, but nothing beyond that. of course, your friends hovered nearby, waiting for one of you to make a move. when it was already past 1 a.m. you decided it was time to go. you called a ride and stood up to take your leave.

your friends whined, begged you to stay, promised they could give you a ride later which you gently declined, like you’d grown used to doing. you waved goodbye to everyone, catching a glimpse of one of jungwon's friends nudging him… but he only kept yapping with his group about whatever they’d been talking about for the past hours.

you left the apartment, checked on your phone again... “20 minutes away”, sighed and decided to wait downstairs anyway.

the digital numbers on the elevator display were so dim, like a toy running on dying batteries. you thought there was a better chance of that thing getting stuck halfway than anything else, scrolling mindlessly through your phone while waited.

metal doors opened with a rusty screech and you got inside, leaning into the corner. but before they could fully close, they stopped again; the sensor signaling something in the way.

“won't you make this any more difficult?”

yang jungwon.

he closed the distance between you, dangerously so, took your phone from your hands and canceled the ride before giving it back, not bothering to explain further. jungwon ran his tongue over his dry lower lip and shook his head, like he was pushing a thought away.

reaching the first floor, the boy took your hand, his touch so firm and warm, guiding you outside, past the gate, straight toward a car parked at the curb.

there wasn’t much conversation. the radio played at a low volume. your arm pulled back every time he changed gears, your knees angled toward the door, and you wanted to believe you were only looking out the window, when you knew perfectly well it was his reflection while he drove that held your attention.

“i can put the address in, if you want…” you offered.

“no need. i know the way” he said simply.

at every red light, it was the same, sometimes resting his front on the steering wheel or lightly tapping his thumbs to the beat coming from the speakers.

as soon as the car stopped in front of your dorm, jungwon pulled the handbrake and turned off the engine. the street was empty.

“stay here” said before getting out and walking around to open the door for you.

he walked with you to the entryway and watched you fumble for the keys again… never failing in amusing him; seeing you silently struggle with your own nerves was a delight. gaze burned over your figure.

"thank you for the ride… and… for everything else” you told awkwardly.

“do you think what happened earlier, in the closet… was only about you?” his voice low, almost dripping like honey.

you didn’t know. how could you?

“should i be clearer? what do you think?” leaned against the nearby pillar next to both of you. “i think i should start begging right now…” he whispered, letting his fingers trace the cold metal before looking at you more intently. “please, y/n, i like you too… but when you say nothing it makes me feel sick” he mimicked. “should i do it like this?”.

it only made your cheeks burn red and your breath hitch. you looked away, hiding half your face in your wrist, jungwon smiled.

“just do whatever you want to” you replied, again trying not to give in so easily.

“everything i want to do with you… i’d never do if you didn’t want it too” tone a bit too serious, eyes dropping from yours to your lips, then tracing down your neck where your pulse throbbed visibly.

the two of you, completely weak and vulnerable to each other. he didn’t want you to leave, and you wanted him to come with you. truly, an eternal game of cat and mouse.

but you were the impatient one this time, taking a few steps back, you entered the small building, leaving the gate open, glancing back just once, inviting him without a single word.

that was all he needed.

***

the stairs up to the dorm had felt endless. just two flights, but jungwon couldn’t wait, pulling you close and pressing you against every surface. the heat of him seeping through every layer of fabric. the kisses were also different now, hungrier, deeper, his hands wandering with eagerness.

his fingers found the strands at the back of your neck, curling them around before giving a gentle pull, making you gasp and shiver against his tongue. you nearly stumbled twice.

inside the room, you two bumped into everything - the small shoe bench by the entrance, the fluffy rug, and finally the foot of the bed -, he pushed you onto the soft mattress, among your plushies, and climbed on top of you. chest pressing against yours, weight grounding you in all the right ways.

lips didn’t miss a thing… your jaw, your neck, your collarbones, the sliver of waist now exposed where your shirt had ridden up, every inch of skin electrified under his touch. the boy's knee slid between your legs, pressing firmly into your core, drawing out little gasps from you as you squirmed under. he held your hips with one hand, tugging you closer, pushing you down, making you ride it.

“just like this...” jungwon hissed into your ear. your movements seeking friction against him, only made his pants tighter, every shift of your body sending shivers through your bodies.

he paused to sit up and pull off his own shirt, a corner of his lips tugging into a smile as he noticed you now looking without hesitation. “enjoying?” he said, pulling you to sit on the bed as well, kneeling on the floor beside the mattress. helping with your top first, then your skirt, inspecting your matching set of undies decorated with little fruits, shaking his head amusedly when you pouted.

“you look too much!” you protested, trying to cover yourself with a fluffy bunny from your collection.

“i know...” jungwon leaned closer, noses brushing, “and i don’t think i'm going to stop anytime soon…”, pressing a slow kiss to your cheek, tossing the stuffed bunny aside, and laying over you again, planting kisses across your entire face.

“have you ever…?”

“does it matter?” you asked, genuinely surprised - and happy - by his concern.

“just answer, princess” nibbling on your earlobe.

and you had to swallow a moan before replying, “only a few times…”

“aww” he purred, returning to your lips, taking them with an unmistakable hunger. one hand slid down your body, cupping your chest over your bra, tracing your abdomen, and slipping into your panties, teasing the inner part of your thigh with the tips of his fingers, feeling your warm skin. as he moved closer to your center, he traced your pussy lips, sliding his index between them, feeling it get slick with your fluids. "you are soaked".

you took two fingers inside with no resistance at all… if you were hard to conquer, he surely knew something who wasn’t. he used his thumb to play with your clit in circular motions at the same time when you started panting.

your hands tangled in his neck, eyes squeezed shut, brow furrowed as you babbled his name already.

with his free hand, he tugged the cups of your bra down and captured one of your nipples in his mouth, sucking harsh and tracing it with the tip of his tongue; eyes up to your face that was contorting with the stimulation. he nibbled the flesh and laughed mischievously every time you tried to look at him back, giving up when you couldn’t hold the gaze. only switched sides once the perked bud was swollen.

your hips grew edgy with time, your pussy wet enough to make sounds echo through the small room. and just as you were about to come, he stopped.

the look on his face didn’t lie, he did it on purpose. so, so mean.

he unbuttoned his jeans pulling them down along with his underwear before kicking the clothes aside. spat into his palm before stroking his hard cock, pressing it against your sex, groaning and huffing as the head brushed against your entrance. lined the tip at your opening and teased one more bit.

you practically mewled when he stretched you deliciously as he dragged out a hoarse “mhmm fuck”.

his hips immediately began to move after adjusting to the tight interior, sliding almost all the way out before thrusting back in. the first few seconds were agonizing, making you sink your fingers into his ribs, scratching him with your nails. but as the thrusts got faster, your digits trembled, and you struggled to hold yourself.

"so difficult f’me… and for what?" voice low and raspy. "if it was going to end like this…"

you wanted to retort, but the moment he noticed, the yang tugged one of the damn plush toys under your hips. dick kissing your cervix as soon as the angle allowed. and he with his tongue hanging out as he applied pressure on your lower belly. "what? cat got your tongue?".

your eyes rolled back, cheeks puffing and releasing with your whines. small hands landed on his chest, and he pulled one of your thighs to wrap around his waist; strands of hair clung to his forehead, damp with sweat, while his eyes only left yours to watch your pussy swallow him completely.

the knot deep in your womb tightened, making your body shiver involuntarily.

"you close too, baby?" jungwon threw his head back, biting his lower lip hard. "d-don’t pull out…" your plea came out in a sob, and he stared at you for half a second, dumbstruck by your words.

he kissed you again, sloppily, thrusting deep, feeling you squeeze him like crazy.

both came together. hot cum filling you, painting your spongy walls. your body arched, tensed, and relaxed. head spinning, and for a brief moment, stars seemed to sparkle behind closed eyes.

one more roll of his hips finished emptying him, and he could see that white ring forming at the base of his member.

it was only when you caught your breath that you looked at each other again, with no intention of letting go. a sudden mutual embarrassment hits and he chuckles. "what?" you ask, confused but also giggling.

"it’s just... it was hard to reach you" he said, a smile with dimples accompanying the words.

"well, sometimes you have to play the game…" you ventured, trying to sound nonchalant.

"oh yeah?" his eyebrow lifted in that usual gesture. "then let’s do best of three", a sly grin tugging at his lips.

"best of what?"