Hey guys! In light of her new album, hereās a Taylor Swift Jukebox Musical my friend with autism is writing. I think this would be great theater fodder, what do you think?
CATHERINE: 23. Working in a soul crushing office job. Lives with her best college friend Ali. Kinda bi, but not out. Dating boy named Jason.
ALI: 23. Best friend of Catherine. Hates Jason, but plays the supportive friend.
JASON: 25. Catherineās terrible boyfriend.
MAEVE: 22. Catherineās high school sweetheart. Super butch, and super hot. Like, Ruby Rose hot.
YOUNG!CATHERINE: 17. Catherine in high school. Deeply insecure.
YOUNG!MAEVE: 16. Maeve in high school. Still pretty butchy, but not as sure of herself
SPENCER: 17. Has a deep and abiding crush on Catherine.
ENSEMBLE: Various ages. People of New York City, āthe clubā, and high school students
(CATHERINE begins the scene in a large overcoat and leggings. Begins center stage, surrounded by the ENSEMBLE, as the people of New York City. She begins to sing)
Walkin' through a crowd, the village is aglow
Kaleidoscope of loud heartbeats under coats
Everybody here wanted somethin' more
Searchin' for a sound we hadn't heard before
It's been waitin' for you
Welcome to New York, welcome to New York
It's been waitin' for you
Welcome to New York, welcome to New York
It's a new soundtrack I could dance to this beat, beat forevermore
The lights are so bright but they never blind me, me
It's been waitin' for you
Welcome to New York, welcome to New York
(ALI enters with bags. Her and CATHERINEās apartment appears. A bed, with JASON in it, and a coat rack roll out.)
When we first dropped our bags on apartment floors
Took our broken hearts, put them in a drawer
Everybody here was someone else before
And you can want who you want
(2 ENSEMBLE MEN walk past on ALIās left, and 2 ENSEMBLE WOMEN on her right).
Boys and boys and girls and girls
It's been waitin' for you
Welcome to New York, welcome to New York
It's been waitin' for you
Welcome to New York, welcome to New York
It's a new soundtrack I could dance to this beat, beat forevermore
The lights are so bright but they never blind me, me
Welcome to New York (New York!)
It's been waitin' for you
Welcome to New York, welcome to New York
Like any great love, it keeps you guessing
Like any real love, it's ever-changing
Like any true love, it drives you crazy
But you know you wouldn't change anything, anything, anything
ENSEMBLE, CATHERINE & ALI
It's been waitin' for you
Welcome to New York, welcome to New York
It's been waitin' for you
Welcome to New York, welcome to New York
It's a new soundtrack I could dance to this beat
The lights are so bright but they never blind me
It's been waitin' for you
The lights are so bright but they never blind me
So bright, they never blind me
(CATHERINE removes her coat and places it on the coat rack. She is wearing a tank top and leggings underneath. She lays in the bed with JASON, sleeping. After a moment, an alarm goes off. CATHERINE checks her phone)
(CATHERINE runs offstage for a moment and returns in a smart pantsuit. She meets ALI, who hands her a granola bar)
(Opening the granola bar and taking a bite)
Yeah.
(CATHERINE walks off, and enters from the other side of the stage. ENSEMBLE members enter and bustle about. A desk appears and CATHERINE sits down at it. āWelcome to New Yorkā theme plays in the background. Ticking sounds imply time is passing. CATHERINE checks her watch, packs her stuff, and exits. The desk leaves the stage with her. She enters again, from the other side. The bed with JASON and an ENSEMBLE WOMAN enters)
(CATHERINE places her coat on the coat rack. She looks closely at the bed. A realization dawns)
(CATHERINE pulls the covers off the bed to reveal JASON and ENSEMBLE WOMAN)
Boys only want love if itās torture.
Donāt say I didn't say I didn't warn ya
Boys only want love if it's torture
Don't say I didn't say I didn't warn ya
(CATHERINE pushes JASON on the CHEST)
(ENSEMBLE WOMAN squeals, and runs offstage covered in a sheet. CATHERINE pulls out a cell phone and dials, holding it up to her ear)
Ali, you will not fucking believe.
(ALI and CATHERINE meet at a club. CATHERINE is nursing a drink while ALI rants)
Like, you donāt even fucking need him. Like, he was a jerk anyway. I knew he was a jerk, I just didnāt want to tell you because you were so damn in love with him.
You really thought he was a jerk?
Catherine, he cheated on you with some hoe. You donāt need him.
(ALI takes a shot and approaches an ENSEMBLE MAN)
Nice to meet you, where you been?
I could show you incredible things
Magic, madness, heaven sin
Saw you there and I thought
Oh my God, look at that face
You look like my next mistake
Loveās a game, want to play?
I can read you like a magazine
Ain't it funny, rumors, lie
And I know you heard about me
I'm dying to see how this one ends
Grab your passport and my hand
I can make the bad guys good for a weekend
Or it's gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it's over
If the high was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They'll tell you I'm insane
'Cause you know I love the players
'Cause we're young and we're reckless
We'll take this way too far
It'll leave you breathless
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They'll tell you I'm insane
But I've got a blank space baby
CATHERINE
Youāre insane.
You need to get out there.
(CATHERINE rolls her eyes, but continues)
Cherry lips, crystal skies
I could show you incredible things
Stolen kisses, pretty lies
You're the king baby I'm your Queen
Wait the worst is yet to come, oh no
Screaming, crying, perfect storm
I can make all the tables turn
Rose gardens filled with thorns
Keep you second guessing like
(MAEVE enters, holding a beer.)
But you'll come back each time you leave
'Cause darling I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream
CATHERINE and ENSEMBLE WOMEN
Or it's gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it's over
If the high was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They'll tell you I'm insane
'Cause you know I love the players
'Cause we're young and we're reckless
We'll take this way too far
It'll leave you breathless
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They'll tell you I'm insane (Insane)
But I've got a blank space baby
Boys only want love if it's torture
Don't say I didn't say I didn't warn ya
Boys only want love if it's torture
Don't say I didn't say I didn't warn ya
Or it's gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it's over
If the high was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They'll tell you I'm insane
'Cause you know I love the players
'Cause we're young and we're reckless
We'll take this way too far
It'll leave you breathless
Got a long list of ex-lovers
They'll tell you I'm insane
But I've got a blank space baby
(CATHERINE takes another shot and approaches MAEVE)
Iām not sure why, but I feel like I know you.
You really donāt remember?
(A moment of realization)
I-Wow. How, um, are you?
MAEVE
(CATHERINE turns to the bartender)
CATHERINE
Hi, can I have a shot please?
(MAEVE chuckles to herself)
Thatās so you itās unreal.
So...how have things been?
Oh you know, college. Work. Dating a couple jerks.
Boys only want love if itās torture
(CATHERINE gets very close to MAEVEās face)
(CATHERINE and MAEVE keep drinking. The club empties slowly and lights turn down)
Can we (MAEVE hiccups) have another round?
Sorry ladies, Iām gonna have to cut you off.
So...do you maybe want to come back to my place?
(CATHERINE and MAEVE exit, holding hands)
(CATHERINE and MAEVE enter, making out intensely)
Iāve (gasps) Iāve missed you.
(They collapse onto the bed. CATHERINE takes her shirt off.)
High tide, came and brought you in
And I could go on and on, on and on
And I will, skies grow darker, currents swept you out again
And you were just gone and gone, gone and gone
In silent screams, and wildest dreams
This love is a life back from the dead, oh
These hands had to let it go free
And this love came back to me, oh
Tossing, turning, struggle through the night for someone new
And I could go on and on, on and on
Lanterns burning, flickered in the mind only you
But you were still gone, gone, gone
Been losing grip, on sinking ships
You showed up, just in time
This love is a life back from the dead, oh
These hands had to let it go free
And this love came back to me, oh
This love left a permanent mark
This love is glowing in the dark, oh
These hands had to let it go free
And this love came back to me, oh
This love, this love, this love, this love
This love, this love, this love, this love
This love, this love, this love, this love
This love came back to me, oh
(MAEVE and CATHERINE kiss)
(MAEVE gets up and dresses quickly, before CATHERINE and moves to a kitchen area with a coffee butler and several cups on a table. She picks up the coffee butler and pours herself a cup. She sits, and sighs)
(CATHERINE stirs. She stretches on the bed and walks to the kitchen, clad only in underwear and MAEVEās shirt from the night before. You know, typical, implied āthey just slept togetherā stuff. She pads over to the kitchen)
MAEVE
Just like...just like it used to be.
(CATHERINE grabs a cup and pours herself some coffee.)
MAEVE
What happened to us?
Maeve, you know what happened.
(YOUNG!CATHERINE and YOUNG!MAEVE enter from the other side of the stage. YOUNG!CATHERINE giggles as YOUNG!MAEVE whispers something in her ear.)
And...and after that one night
(YOUNG!CATHERINE and YOUNG!MAEVE sit on the unmade bed, still onstage from the previous scene)
I think I might like girls.
(YOUNG!CATHERINE and YOUNG!MAEVE kiss)
God, Maeve, we were just kids.
Does that mean it doesnāt matter?
(YOUNG!CATHERINE and YOUNG!MAVE get up off the bed. The bed rolls offstage.)
It just means...I donāt know what it means
(ENSEMBLE members, this time as high schoolers enter and mill about, talking about the nonsense high schoolers talk about. SPENCER enters, approaches YOUNG!CATHERINE)
(YOUNG!MAEVE walks away, stopped by a male ENSEMBLE member. He pushes her, knocks her books to the floor.)
(YOUNG!CATHERINE is distracted)
(Bell rings, ensemble members begin to exit)
(absently)
I gotta go. See you in calc.
(Catching up to YOUNG!MAEVE)
'Cause, baby, I could build a castle
Out of all the bricks they threw at me
And every day is like a battle
But every night with us is like a dream
(YOUNG!MAEVE makes sure there is no one around before kissing YOUNG!CATHERINE, chastely.)
YOUNG!CATHERINE
You wanna...get out of here?
(DANCE TIME!) @taylornationonline @taylornation @taylorswift