*They're drinking juice
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*They're drinking juice

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Blue
just thinking about Owen Mercer's entire existence and how crazy it is that Captain Boomerang's son is a speedster and Bart Allen's half-brother
like...that is going to result in so many awkward conversations...
.weve invented a kind of sex which is.impossible for anyone to have, especiallyyou in particular, but instead can be successively closer and closer approximated through performing a selection of unrelated actions.
.and you stop the water for tea from boiling over just in the nick of.time and you say outloud i love you to no one in particular.
.and your partner halfway across the world he or she or they or them or xe or xem or whatever the fuck else it its user your partner watches the water bubble as it gets hot while undressing unzipping pants and looking at metal objecta and that declaration of love hits them innthe back of.the head caysing them to collapse on the floor perfectly.
.the water boils over the stove shuts down in order to protect itself and the detective can never quite figure it out. and everything always gets away just before they can close the case. and they cry alone in a bar bathroom knowing how that doesnt fit the stereotype.
.about that and about how no fault divorce made them have less clientele and now their bureau might collapse. and about how theyre hoping once in their miserable neoliberal life for a real mystery.
.the mirror begins to steam as the water in the sink comes to a boil. detective found dead with a strange pattern of burns on his PENIS AHAHAHAHA
mike: "lowk you might have to do this without your husband sor—"
nick: "this is the perfect time to waste as much OBT as possible to ensure that HE has to do it without ME thanks micheal"
.have I mentioned how much I hate yaoi

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it goes without saying that he is hopelessly dependent on the Juice
juice day is kinda like boxing day after christmas. the main celebration is done and everyone's a little weary from all the festivities, but there's still food to eat, and often another side of the family or friends to visit and celebrate with
we've had our homestuck day, now instead of the celebrations immediately being over we get to wind down with one more day of juice celebrations
Juice boxes goated as fuuuuu k