#jswk

"Fag!" Louie cringed when the word rang through his ears, painful memories flooding back into his mind as he rounded the corner and came face to face with the culprit. His heart dropped into his stomach when he peeked around the boys to find Flounder huddled in the corner, back against the wall that they'd backed him into. "Is there a problem here?" He breathed, glancing back to the boys to blame, who scoffed at him.

"Not one that's your concern." The taller, and presumably older one hissed, and Louie sighed -- never in his life had he been able to stand up to bullies, not even when his brothers gave him pep talks, but one more glance at Flounder had him rethinking that aspect of his life. "See that's another thing you have wrong, it is my concern because that boy you're tormenting," he gestured to Flounder, "is my best friend, so you need to back the fuck off, and apologize." He breathed, forcing himself not to visibly cringe when the boy closest to him leaned in closer to him.

"This fag is your friend?" 

"Don't call him that."

"Don't call him what? Fag? Why does it offend you? Are you a fag too?" 

"Maybe. But most importantly it makes you look like uncultured jackasses. In case you didn't get the memo on how the 21st century works, let me lay it out for you. The politically correct term would be gay, and it's also politically incorrect to use it as an insult, because gay marriage is legal in several places now. Including New York." Louie was proud of himself, and even mentally pat himself on the back before his pride dissipated, both boys turning their attention on him now. 

"So you are a fag! Is this your fag boyfriend?" One hissed, and the other offered a high five, which made Louie feel sick to his stomach. 

"Stop calling him that!" Louie shouted, unable to control the volume of his voice, which seemed to please the tormentors. 

"Aw, does little baby think he's scary?"

Louie stumbled backwards as they drew closer, a sudden change of faces sending his heart into a frenzy. There in front of him stood Gregory and his best mate Rider, both smirking down at Louie.

"I think witte baby is gonna cry, Rider!" Greg sneered, a pleased tone latching onto his words as Louie's back hit the wall, and there was no where for him to go.

"Why do we help him with that, Greg?"

They gave each other a knowing look before they took turns throwing punches at him, until he was curled up on the ground, his hands covering his head as he kept his face down, as if that was going to protect him -- you'd think he'd learn by now what that position initiated.

Louie felt the air being taken from him when the iron-toe of Rider's combat boots slammed into his gut. Through the rushing blood he could hear Flounder yelling at them to stop, and he looked up through tears to see the blonde boy trying to get to him. He opened his mouth to tell Flounder to get out of here, leave while he could, but no words came out, and he watched helplessly as Rider moved his attention to Flounder, while Gregory dealt with him.

He watched through Rider's legs the pained expressions cross Flounder's features, and eventually had to tear his eyes away, knowing that he hadn't done anything but make this all that much worse for the boy.

He knew he was bleeding, from several places he was bleeding, and pain seemed to course from every part of his body when he finally came back around, but that wasn't what mattered. He mustered up the strength to crawl over to Flounder, who seemed to have blacked out just as he had. "Flounder?"

"Flounder please say something!" He cried, brushing blonde hair away from the boys face. "Flounder please!"

He dipped his head so that his ear was pressed against the boys chest, finding only some relief when he heard the beat of his heart, because it was slow, slower than it should be.

It didn't matter how much pain riddled his boy, or how weak he felt, he scooped up the younger boy and wobbled his way to the infirmary, shouting at the nurses who didn't seem to see him standing with a beaten boy in his arms.

"Please you have to help him!" He shouted.

"Why aren't you listening to me?! He's hurt real bad, and he needs your help! Fucking help him!" His voice got louder, harsher, but still no response, and he felt the weight of the world on his shoulders only get heavier when his father stepped through the door, a disappointed look on his face.

"You see what happens when you're gay, Louie? This is what happens. He deserved this, and you do too if you're gay." His father muttered, not a single emotion in his words, and Louie shook his head, more tears streaming down his cheeks.

"N-no, no he doesn't deserve this! He hasn't even figured it out yet! He's not like me! He doesn't know if he is gay! Someone has to help him!" 

His father chuckled cynically, shaking his head with the sound. "No one is going to help a fag. Why couldn't you just me more like your brothers Louie?"

Then his father disappeared again, and the last few words echoed painfully around him.

More like your brothers, Louie

More like your brothers, Louie

More like your brothers, Louie

More like your brothers, Louie

He shot forward in bed, his lungs gasping painfully for air that they couldn't grasp, and his chest tightening in a way that made him feel like he was being crushed between two metal doors.

He knew what it was, he was no stranger to panic attacks, but even so he couldn't get himself to calm down, he couldn't soothe his breathing. As he gasped for air, and his heart beat rapidly in his chest, tears forming in his eyes he fumbled around in the dark for his phone, he didn't know how late it was, and he knew Flounder would probably be asleep, and that it had only been a night terror, but he had to confirm that he was back in reality, that his dream had been just that, a dream. 

Flounder, I know it's late, but please text me back, please tell me you're alright. He typed the words so fast he wasn't sure they'd come out properly, and he didn't have the patience, or the sight, or the breath to check himself before sending it. He rolled out of bed, and stumbled into the bathroom, splashing cold water on his face before slumping against the edge of the bathtub. The panic attack seemed to last for hours, but it soon dissipated, and he was able to breath again.  

It's sad that even when I'm so out of practice, I can still out ride and out jump someone who claims to be the best. Braggers never cease but to disappoint.

RJ no

top

scsasred

kira

ok tellling you

you ok?

?????????????

no tron

mamatron

tron

tron

hanna

tron

me .... what?

RJ

ok

don'tr jbidw

don't snser

got to

ok?

ty

worried ok?

me

rj try to get some sleep?

RJ l

eyes'

yes

tron

tron

trib'

trob

tron

tron

andswer

tron

tron ok?

tron

oh dfrpol

tron

no

stop i'm vcrying

ok?

i'm scared

you ok???

are you ok?

me

are you?

rj

no kira!

omfg