it is a long read, so get yourselves a drink and get comfortable.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/118EMbxwbY0Ky3M4AFNe6HH2PhpNyORGM-NPIjIu_M80

im jus  st reall;y, so so,rr;;y i.. d,idn’t intend harm on purpose. i w,asn’,t uawar,,e of my emotions at t,he tim juste.   an  d  i genuinely ddo feel bad ,and im just trying my be,,st to; work ,hard on ,,being;; a better, ,,person, an d;;im jusst really so sorry for being abucsiv (i never knew what i w..as doinng was wwrong;,   as no one had told me during the. tim juste, i was really young ..and i didn’t; k,,Now waht was  righ..t or wrnog, no o;ne ever, ,,toldd me ;;at all.) i’m so sorry fo;r my bad;; behavio;;r, dealing with my men,ta  lhealth is ab strug gle and, ssometi;m juste,,s it cna get;; out. of h  and bu,,t i’m  not. maki ng myself  th,e,, Victim just, im just just trying  to expl,,ain thate most of the dramma has ,to do wi..th;; m;;ew showingn , egative  gu,il.t trpipy emoti..ons. i  am  no;;t aware.. of my actions during a ba;d break..Downn or m;ental state, and im just not aware of tteh other perso..n’s feeling;s ,,hwen i eel   bad,. ;so i, get se lfish. and im just so sorry,

but.. no .wi realize my w rongs na i admit i was awfuul but,, i am real.ly  ;so sorrY for causing, trouble and making mistakes i s  holudn’t have done, i regret;; them  ve ry de;;eply and i kno;; wt..hey were stupid. i reaall,y  re,ally didnt mean toh urt anoyn,,e. i know i cant fixb it, but ii can still t;;ry to apologiz,e. i know not to m;;ake thhe same ,,mistakes,, fromm previous yyears ago aS information inn thIs rama, is very ol,d and `some iS fairly recen;t, but that’s no  excusee a,nd. i understand ww  h,,y pepole; are mad at me for ,,pas;;t mista..ke;;s.

imm reccordddinngg a a aan asmmr rr ffr all  mmy cccowwboy ppppals out tthhere,, tttrrigiger warningng for mmy mommm abbusinng mme in thhe mmidddle ssoryr abbout that yeeehhaw