#johnofthecross

To have freedom, you must submit.

To live, you must die. 

In the midst of the wrath of the cross, is found the greatest love of all.

These are some of the paradoxes that are seemingly found in Christianity. It’s an upside down world where the meek inherit the earth and the proud are cast down. It’s a world where the rich flourish for a season, but the poor will eventually receive their reward. 

On the recommendation of my coworker, I’ve started reading St John of the Cross’ “Dark Night of the Soul”. In the introduction, I found this quote I really liked. It says, “The Dark Night of the Soul is deeply expressive of the paradox central to the Christian faith: that in the cross of Christ, in that abyss of suffering and degradation, is the ultimate expression of the love of an all-powerful and all-merciful God” 

I’ve been reflecting on that line for a couple of days now. Have you ever had that experience? Where a line will hit you hard and you just have to put the book down to reflect on that single line?

So I’ve been reflecting on the paradox of Christian faith. For us to achieve total freedom, we must submit to the will of another. This is contrary to most modern thinking which says that we must do whatever we please in order to be truly free. Paul summarizes it well in Romans 6: 22 “But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life.” The more we surrender our wills to God, the more He can work in us. The more we surrender our desires and worldly goals, the more God can do in us. This leads to us dying to ourselves so that God can live in us and show Himself through our bodies. One of the really cool things that I’ve been reading in Chambers’ “My Utmost for His Highest” is that our mission as ministers of Christ isn’t to talk about our own lives, but to talk about God. That was something crazy for me to hear, cause a lot of times I tend to talk about what God has done in my own life. But if I talk solely about my own life, what God has done for ME, then I miss the point. The point of my testimony should all point to the great work of God. It should never be, “This is what God owes me.”, rather it should be, “This is how great my God is.” We must die to ourselves. Our lives are no longer pointing back to us, but rather pointing to God. The apostle Paul wrote half of the New Testament, yet very little of his epistles focus on himself. We get a few verses here and there that talk about his life before his conversion, but the majority of what he writes about is the work that God is doing in the world around him. Paul could have written an entire letter about who he was before Christ and how he was called into the ministry, but he chose to focus on God instead. That’s pretty crazy. And hard for most of us to do. 

As I’ve been in this season of a lot of reflection and looking forward to what’s next, I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to die to myself. What does it mean to put the focus away from myself and shine the spotlight on God? I think back to how many of my conversations with people showcased myself. I put myself at the center of this grand narrative. This is what God is doing in MY life. God has merely been a secondary character who has been building me up, but the story is still primarily mine. Yet, this is incorrect. WE are the secondary characters. At the core of the redemption story, God still stands strong. We are throwaway characters. God chooses to use us for His own glory. Whatever work He does in us is merely meant for a purpose of His own. It’s hard to understand from a human perspective. We’re NOT the main characters?!?!? Nope. We’re not. Our life experiences aren’t meant to validate us. They’re meant to validate God. They’re meant to show other people what God does in the world.