#jinny

hiiiii jinny 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

27. your favorite part of the writing process

i honestly love just writing and having the characters come to life 😭 i’ve written about it in my eng 101 class but i’m not artistic in any other medium besides writing (besides doing hair but that’s a different can of worms). i can do mean stick figures, i’m not the best at designing things, and i’ve always struggled with doing art. i always joke that i’m not an artist, my sister is the one with the art degree, not me. but writing is really freeing and it’s just fun. i write for the love of the game, not for hits or anything. it’s fun to get comments and yeah it does suck when a fic i worked really hard on flops, but that’s not why i’m writing. i’m writing for me, and anyone who enjoys what i write is just an added bonus <3

28. your least favorite part of the writing process

when i eventually gets writer’s block and i can’t figure out how to move on. my writing process is weird and i have to write in chronological order (unless i have a rough idea for a scene and i can get the basics out and eventually insert more later). so i can’t just move on to the next scene without actually writing the current scene. i’m a big stickler on leaving no plot holes and having no continuity errors (yall should’ve seen me when i was writing my trans louis big bang and subsequent fics 😭) so in my mind, i can’t write ahead because it could create a plot hole or continuity error and then i just know it’s there. now i hate my fic and it goes in the trash. so i HATE writers block because it holds up the entire process

29. how easy is it for you to come up with titles?

so this is where i tell everyone my writing process because it’s genuinely insane (according to others)

first, i come up with a title either by listening to a song and hearing it (which is what happened with my big bang this year actually). OR i have a prompt and find a title from there. 99.9% of the time, it’s a lyric to a song. i’m not creative for titles, yall. i’ve published one fic that isn’t a lyric (defying stars, my marching band fic) and i have one in the works of @bottomlouisficfest (rounding third and heading for home, it’s something joe nuxhall would say when he was a broadcaster. rip joe nuxhall youngest reds player ever) but all my other fics have been song lyrics. then i come up with a summary that gets placed at the top of every word doc with the song title (i’ll include an example below of the fic i’m writing for fandom trumps hate for @allwaswell16 ). and then i write the fic. in chronological order.

^title of this is and every glow in the twilight knows

title and summary can be tweaked later (a lot of fics do have their original title, but some don’t), but i can’t start a fic without a title and summary.

Jinny

tw: discussions of colonial racism and implied s/a

jinny might be one of the most overlooked and misunderstood characters in the waves. she's part of the reason why feminist scholars of woolf disregarded this book for decades, since the female characters in this book seem weak and stereotypical at first glance. jinny especially- it's easy to read her as frivolous and vain, but there is so much more going on with her character. reducing her to the stereotypes that woolf is purposefully playing on betrays a fundamental misunderstanding of one of the most meaningful parts of this text. on a surface level, jinny seems to be mainly influenced and motivated by countless men, but if you look closer, it's actually her relationships with *women* that define her, and they are fraught, violent, and mediated relationships.

there are three passages that really exemplify this:

for jinny, femininity is not frivolous and delicate- it is a life-and-death struggle, a war to be waged every day of her life, and she can never put down her weapons.

now, what does hegel have to do with all of this?

let's take a look at some passages from the phenomenology of spirit.

in this context, "self-conscious" doesn't mean nervous or uncomfortable, but rather philosophically conscious of one's own acts or states as belonging to or originatining in oneself. in hegel's opinion, developing a sophisticated and independent self-consciousness requires struggle and risk. by putting oneself at risk, one can prove their worth both to themself and another person. this is the way to achieve a higher self-consciousness- through doubling.

here, hegel is challenging earlier conceptions of how the self develops. he states that it requires the presence of another, rather than solitary navel-gazing and pondering within one's own mind.

this "doubled act" is what makes someone a self-conscious subject.

through this lens, let's look at this passage from the waves again:

the way that jinny constructs her identity, the way that she proves her worth to herself and others, is through this "honourable antagonism" and struggle.

additionally, the following passage is fraught with violent metaphors, showing how she is metaphorically "putting one's own life on the line" in order to prove her worth

however, jinny also constructs herself by rejecting "animalistic" or "natural" impulses.

in this passage, jinny has natural impulses, caused by fear, that she immediately rejects. she has an urge to "cower and run for shelter" and "make for the shadow" but she rejects those feelings immediately. twice, she insists "i will not be afraid."

by disallowing natural urges, she reaffirms her sense of self as someone who is not cowed, who is part of something "powerful and beautiful."

this contrast between self-conscious subjects and natural existence was explained by hegel:

it would be fair to say she has "let go of natural existence" in some ways, and that her "freedom of self-consciousness" depends on her ability to move through the world without being afraid. after being separated from herself in the scene above, she returns into herself by "[bringing] the whip down on [her] flanks."

additionally, another way jinny distinguishes herself is fraught with colonial racism- placing herself in opposition to the "savage" and the "animal" through signifiers of "civilization".

HUGE disclaimer: there are many problems with hegel's master-and-bondsman philosophy. i do not personally subscribe to hegel's beliefs, nor do i condone woolf's racism, but i believe that their works can be understood as products of history that can and should be analyzed and examined critically.

so, with that in mind, let's delve into hegel's master-bondsman dynamic.

let's break this down. so, the fundamental premise of this entire chapter is hegel's argument for how self-consciousness is attained and defined. he is examining the master-servant dynamic through this philosophical lens, and he comes to the conclusion that the master's self-consciousness is dependent on the servant. he is describing a mediated relation, or a relationship that requires an intermediary rather than being a direct connection. in this case, the "thinghood" is essential for the servant to act as an intermediary. (i'd love to go into aimé cesaire's take on this but then this post would be ten times as long). in his mind, the master cannot exist without the servant.

with this in mind, let's look at jinny in this passage:

although she does not have a personal relationship with or act as a direct "master" to anyone in particular, her identity as an English subject in the British Empire places her in a position of symbolic power. she embraces this position. in this passage, she differentiates herself from her imagined, stereotypical, subjugated colonial subjects and chooses to associates herself with victorious civilizers. this is a mediated relation through which she arrives at self-consciousness, and through the lens of hegel's master-servant dynamic, it seems unstable and exposes her instability and her lack of self-sufficiency. she is longing for certainty and power, but the way she "achieves" it reveals her fundamental uncertainty and instability. this can be read as a microcosm of the psychological dimension of coloniality (a reading which might be supported by bernard and neville's descriptions of percival).

on a character analysis level, however, this lends depth to the parts of jinny's character that are often deemed frivolous. by reading this passage through a hegelian lens, the "patent-leather shoes" and "reddened lips" and "finely pencilled eyebrows" are not merely makeup showing vanity but rather tools and weapons, signifiers of colonial strength showing psychological weakness.