#jest rambles

I heard a lot of praise from people about how this game changed their life; and while I can see how, it didn't quite do that for me. Of course, I'm not finished, but I was expecting... more? I don't know. I'm not underwhelmed with this game. There was never a point where the game felt like a slog. There is so much to do, even though the world is honestly small. I have my issues with the map (I get why it's like that but... man it's annoying sometimes), but even that feels like a nitpick when traversing is just fun. The save stations were cool, and the fast travel was convenient of course but sometimes I still opted to just walk and run for the sake of taking in the environment.

Nier has a lot to say about humanity. about love. about what makes us who we are. I read a review from a friend on backloggd before I played where they mentioned that Nier might have their favorite side quests of any game ever—which felt like a high bar. I mean, really. Ever? After playing, I get it now.

I don't think that anything Nier says is revolutionary, per se, but I think that the tact and sensitivity in which it explores love and humanity and identity are so tender and beautiful that I really do get it.

[Journal 030] Rain is falling. A bird stopped on my shoulder. I never tire of looking at life on this planet. I will make my record of this bird protected data so I do not lose it.

There were quite a few side quests that left an impact and I don't want to even begin talking about them in fear someone will have this experience ruined for them even just a bit. I never cried or got overly emotional, but that doesn't mean I felt nothing. It's hard to put into words. Like a warm cup of broth when you're sick. A fresh blanket out of the dryer during the winter season. Being held by your lover on a quiet evening.

The main story is quite good too. Ironically, I have less to say here. It was good. I liked it. I'd almost say I loved it, but I can't. The copied city, 9S, 2B, and everything with regards to the last... two? three? hours was the highlight. And I mean, for anyone who's played, is that really a surprise? 2B's development over time was guy wrenching. To watch her come out of this shell, accept her own humanity as an individual because of her love for 9S even after spending the entirety of the campaign arguing that machines are just that—machines.

9S' crucifixion was really visually striking, and not just for the very literal imagery. Im having a difficult time describing what it was about it that left such an impression, but I think it was just the matter that I didn't expect it. The journey to finding 9S once again, expecting him to be well and chipper after his sacrifice, if not just his corpse and black box. I didn't expect to see him strung up and... martyred? By another machine driving home a point. In that moment, when 2B loses her cool and finds herself, I felt what she did. It resonated deeply. Of course, this extends to the final fight. The fight itself? Awesome as fuck. So hype and so fun, but its the ending itself, with 9S' resurrection as a machine, saved by the corruption that takes him from 2B in the first place, is so... aughhh man. It's hard to put into words.

I beat route A and I desperately want there to be more. Like I said, I've started route B (presumably, at least) in which you pilot 9S instead. It's been fun. I'm only a few hours in (two, i think) and I'm having fun. The hacking mechanic is really cool, and I'm excited to potentially revisit quests I missed the first time. Of course, it seems this time will be a lot shorter. There are less markers, and I feel railroaded into the main story, just from the perspective of another character which is... I mean I'm not unhappy with it? 9S is so likeable, and his commentary is so fun, but I hope there's more substance than just a perspective shift. Maybe that's selfish but I want more Nier, not to just re-experience what I played a few hours ago.