#jess x ruby

“And I'm sexy like Christina when I dip it low

Not an H-town girl, but I rodeo

Yippee-ki-yay, welcome to the show

jess x ruby college au [cw supernatural]

Jess leaves love letters like pinned butterflies under Ruby’s pillow.

Every morning, Ruby reaches under, unfolds, smooths out, reads the way Jess’ affection soaks with the ink into the paper. u’ll do great on ur test today!!! xoxo. breakfast is on the table mmmmm. don’t mind prof crowley ur essay was gr8!!

Ruby looks between the lines - it’s not difficult, it’s all there, because that’s what she’s trained for, to hypothesize and to theorize and to extrapolate the given evidence, and it’s all there. I don’t want you to be anxious, Jess writes, in bubbly and metallic glitter pen. I want you to feel cared for. I want you to know that you’ve got someone on your side.

Now, Ruby knows what she can do with this: has eighteen, nineteen, twenty years worth of knowing exactly how far you can fuck someone up with affection, turning love back on itself, twisting it into a weapon. It could be funny. It could give her that rush of power. It has done before.

But she doesn’t want to do that.

And she wonders when romance and affection became something that warmed her, rather than disgusted her; when a pretty and straightlaced girl like Jess could turn her head faster than a six pack and a syringe of dope. Ruby wonders when an actual human being making actual human contact became bearable - desirable - needed, rather than something to avoid at all costs.

It should be suffocating, but it’s not. It’s warming. Fulfilling. Last week, she handed in two essays, cried at a banal movie and exchanged small talk with a small dark haired girl in her seminar group, and now she can’t remember what it was like to walk through college corridors like a ghost in a crowd, feeling totally disconnected apart from people around her.

Now, she does dinner dates and text messages and footsie under breakfast tables. Now, she wakes to a girlfriend, to quiet, homely flat, to love letters under her pillow.

She breathes deep; wonders, quietly, what happened to all that anger. If, in the act, of falling in love with Jess, filling up with love took up all the space of hate.

It’s morning. Ruby opens her eyes, slowly. The pillow crinkles beneath her. Reach under, unfold, smooth out, read. i rly hope you have a good day <3