#jaykstah

spring cleaning in the dead of winter | Isle of Mind #3

Usually around this time of year I’m quite low energy. There’s some level of seasonal depression at play for sure, along with the regular issues. I think the excitement shared by everyone in holiday fervor also takes its toll. I hit a low point in October that forced me to bounce back a bit. But this time around I’ve been holding through more steadily and have maintained some extra energy. Now I’m scrounging the motivation to do something worthwhile with it.

Like many I have a classic tradition of dreaming up all the ways I could improve my life and then using that to draft some new years resolutions which will be forgotten by mid-February at best. This time around, though, I’ve pretty much skipped Christmas in my mind. In all honesty this is just one of those random burst of inspiration moments but I’m framing it in my own mind as “getting ahead” on the new year. If I put some pieces in place now, then when Jan 1 rolls around I’ll already have one foot in the right direction versus starting from scratch as soon as the year turns.

For this week the process has involved cleaning up digitally. I do some virtual housekeeping every once in a while and try to keep my home server somewhat well maintained. But its been a while since I’ve really dug deep.

What started out as simply organizing folders and cleaning out unneeded data turned into an opportunity to reset and touch base with myself. What am I and who do I want to be online? That question led me to cleaning up this very website and restructuring it a bit. It’s simple and not that pretty to look at but I’m now committed to maintaining this as a solid hub for my stuff. As cool as linktree and all those services are for convenience, being able to point someone to jaykstah.com and be like “yeah just go there and have a look around” is awesome. So I need to make sure this place is easily navigable and makes sense. I build up convoluted ties between different things I do in my mind but I’m trying to get better at putting them out there in a clear way.

With that I’ve also been looking back at all the social media I use. I don’t know if I’ll necessarily go around nuking old accounts but I’m more focused now on just existing on a few platforms that I can be sure to update and that serve a purpose. If I can keep jaykstah.com as a clean base of operations centered around everything I do then the other social media pages can be specialized. Tumblr and Instagram are mainstays for me. I’m considering becoming a bit more active with Bluesky instead of Threads. Maybe get back to my SpaceHey profile.

Now that I’m trying to condense my online presence I’ve been finding inspiration to get back into the fun sort of scrolling I used to do years ago. Finding cool vibes, sharing thoughts, sharing photos of life. Just having fun browsing around and exploring. I’ve spent so many hours doomscrolling this year that I don’t even know why I want social media. I've spent so many hours just scrolling through exclusively what algorithms have shown me which has its good and bad. And that reflection got me thinking about what it felt like back then.

Oh, and a new EP. I have a lot of songs I’ve been picking at the past few months but there are around 5 I’ve been excited about and I’d like to have a new EP out sometime early 2026. Just some vocal re-recording and a bit more time in production. I released a couple songs this year which is great, now it’s time to lock in that workflow so I can be a little bit more prolific with releases without overthinking the process so much.

Like many entries in this journal series, I’m not sure exactly what the purpose of this is, or what you should learn from it. But this is where I’m at in December 2025:

I wanna start fresh. This year I’ve really been rediscovering myself after the absolute thrashing I’d given my mental state throughout my early 20s. Now in the midst of that rediscovery I want to get back to my roots, at least in terms of internet presence. Be here, post stuff that brings me joy, and let personality shine.

It’s difficult to do with the way the digital landscape looks now. But its possible.

I also have friends and acquaintances to thank for keeping a flame alive through their own passion for old internet culture and digital artistic expression. There have been many conversations had about how we can each play our part in keeping the old personality driven style of internet communication alive and now I’m trying to hold more true to it, because it is special to me. Getting away from the algorithm-driven sterile environments and trying to hold onto and create spaces for fun and whimsy. And good old-fashion web surfing where you just go to a .com and scroll around till you bump into something that interests you.