#jay wilder

Face of the Moon excerpt Chapter 20: Living

Love and hate.  Life and death.  Highs and lows.  Joy and pain.  Things you can’t have without the other.  

Do the lows make the highs feel higher?  Does the pain make the joy feel more joyful?  Is it true that you can only be happy in death if you’ve lived your life to the fullest?  

Can I fully love him again, now that I’ve hated him, can I let myself love him again or did I never stop?

I guess that brings me to my grandparents and great aunt. It’s really not hard to see where Mom developed her belief in love. If Grandpa Jay and Grandpa Kholby were in the same room, they were wrapped up in each other. As I said, there was no denying their all consuming love. 

💗 Describe your OC’s partner(s) from their point of view! What do they really think about them?

Jay: One of the first things I noticed about Kholby was his freckles. I wanted to count each one of them, even if he was giving me a death glare at the time. He’s charismatic and romantic. He’s always doing the sweetest things. And don’t get me going on how he treats the kids. He might not have dreamed of having kids, but he’s been a wonderful father to Salene and Dal. Don’t get me wrong. Not everything is peachy keen. There’s no denying that Kholby is a flawed man, but every day he works on improving himself. This is why I love him.

Kholby: Jay is incredibly funny and always so cheerful. Seldom is there not a smile on his face. Combine that killer smile with his gorgeous green eyes and it’s really no wonder why I never stood a chance against him. Jay is never one to let something get him down. When it comes to his family, he’s a fighter. He’d drop anything and everything to help them out. No questions asked. And he loves so fiercely. Jay is a better man than I’ll ever be. I count my lucky stars he gave me a second chance cause he deserves better. 

You get two pics just cause I love these two and not because I couldn’t pick just one.

🌙: If Kholby could have one wish… 100%, he would go back in time and never cheat on Jay. I guess this would tie into if he could change anything question, but this is his biggest regret. He wishes he’d never done it. Consequences? I think their relationship in their adult years would be drastically different. This incident forced them to face a bit of reality, that they were both keeping secrets from each other, too worried about being a burden to the other. I don’t know. It’s been mentioned before that their relationship is stronger because of it. So because of this, I guess it’s something he might come to regret if he actually got his wish. What would be better? Having hurt the man he loved but growing stronger as a couple or having never hurt said person but living almost a half life?

❄️: It’s so hard to make Jay really sad. He really tries and lives his day as the glass half full. The one thing without a doubt that will make him sad is when something reminds him of Kholby’s infidelity and the divorce. He’s forgiven Kholby and they have moved on from it, but it’s not easily forgotten. Especially for Jay. It brings up his issues of abandonment and insecurities of not being good enough. The best thing to help pull him from these moments is thoughts of his family. Ari, Omar, his kids, “niece and nephews”, and even Kholby. Knowing what he currently has and how good his life is currently is what makes him happy. As for how his sadness effects those around him? He’s gotten good at hiding the sadness. Has been pretty good at it all his life. Sure, there are cracks when people pick up on it and it hurts them to see him so sad. Most of the time, it’s Kholby that sees the sadness. It’s similar to the scene here. One moment it’s all fun and games. The next, a bit of sadness hits. But this is why Kholby helps him. Sure, it hurts like hell to be reminded of your past sins, but putting that aside and helping each other to remember that they’ve grown stronger is all that matters.