#jar2

Relationship, in any form, begins with communication. You meet someone, talk to them, add them on Facebook, message them. That’s how it goes, usually. From there it advances to different directions.Maybe you message them daily, maybe once in a while, depends on how the conversations go. Sometime you just stop messaging them, because they don’t have that ‘click’. You leave their messages unread, unseen, unanswered. I think the American call this “ghosting”. 

Ghosting / Definition When a person cuts off all communication with their friends or the person they're dating, with zero warning or notice before hand. You'll mostly see them avoiding friend's phone calls, social media, and avoiding them in public.

What if you are the one that has been ghosted? You are left behind. Your life goes on. Their life goes on. But that last exact moment between you and that person is frozen, and slowly drifting away. This is the crossing point between 2 lines, you know, the one they always use to describe how a relationship will go. Either 2 parallel lines that never meet, or 2 lines that cross each other then part away. 

Does it feels bad? You are left there hanging, wondering what did you do, what did you say. You feel like you guys were actually pretty close, no? Sent, sent, sent. Messages storm to their inbox. You see their active status but it remains unseen. The end. Yeah, that is the crossing point. 

I have never been ghosted. Not from the people I care enough. 

I ghosted people before. The ones I cared about. In my mind, I thought I was doing good thing. Hey we have crossed our point let’s move on, that was what I thought. I do feel bad, guilty, all of that, of course. But I was doing good thing, right? For both of us. There was no point stretching a teared paper. Better leave it there. Or maybe I just didn’t have the courage to tell them directly. I was scared of the disappointment, the hate, the sobbing, the begging, the hate again. So better I didn’t know any of that, I mean, at least not from them. 

One told me why I didn’t say what I felt. Another told me to be a man and said what I wanted to say. Both ended up horribly, because I ghosted them and thought our lines were just gonna part away. I didn’t know with the parting, the feeling that attached the lines was stretched out in between, and it hurts doing so. One of my friends told me I don’t have to responsible for how other feels, just myself, my own feelings (as long as I wasn’t being an asshole). Set aside the fact that I probably was an asshole, but did I feel better? Were my feelings protected from the disappointment, the hate, the sobbing, the begging? I guess not, they all came from myself. 

“You never know if you never try”, that was what Kate told me. I don’t know if I have tried enough, maybe not. I always rush. I rush to meet people, rush to add them on Facebook, rush to message them, and rush to not-even-say-bye. That was the last for me, I need to stop doing that. Just don’t send that first “Hi nice to meet you”, and the lines go on, as parallel as they will ever be. 

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Product Features

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