kae i am on my hands and knees begging you to tell me how all your favs react to you deadpanning pee snake in the middle of a heated moment,,,, please,,,, (AND I MEAN ALL <3)
the freaks’ reactions to me calling their cocks “pee snakes” in the middle sex:
zoro – so i half-joked here that zoro would kick me out of the crow’s nest—our de facto bedroom on the sunny once we’re official™️—and this manga panel is exactly how i imagine it would look (except i’m naked and i fall on the deck, pussy facing the world)…
in reality, i think he considers kicking me out for .07 seconds, realizes that’s not a viable solution, and proceeds to tell me that if i ever say “pee snake” again he’s not going to fuck me. whether i push my luck or not, dear reader, is for you to imagine ;-)
yuuji – not-so-surprisingly, yuuji is chill about it. in fact, he thinks it’s kind of cute (he’s a little sick in the head, this we know!) he just chuckles and says, “that’s not what it’s called, baby 😊” then proceeds to me into the mattress until i forget how to form a coherent sentence.
laios + kabru – my beloved polycule…they have vastly differing opinions. laios thinks it’s funny and comes up with other ridiculous terms for “penis,” most involving magical creatures—all while continuing sexual activities like it’s the most normal thing in the world. kabru, however, visibly buffers for a solid 15 seconds; he reviews all his life choices leading up to this moment, and wonders if it was worth it. unfortunately, it is worth it, so he shuts laios and me up by preoccupying our mouths <3
ajax – this bastard knows how to push every single one of my buttons, so he starts laughing and talking about how “dumb” he must’ve already fucked me since i’m babbling nonsense 😤 things sort of…devolve from there. let’s leave it at that!
jing yuan – ever the scoundrel, jing yuan chuckles when i say the cursed term. but then he says something along the lines of, “if you must resort to such immature language to get a rise from me, it seems you’re not in the headspace to make love” (YUCK!!!!!!) and then he sits there with his resting :3 face and watches me bluster and squirm because i’m a brat and we both know it. he’ll resort to whatever methods he deems necessary to get me back in the proper mindset (forcing me to cave).
seishiro – doesn’t. even. acknowledge. it. seishiro completely brushes past it because he knows that i’m 1. messing with him and 2. probably stalling because he’s being greedy and trying to fuck me somewhere inappropriate. in his mind, though, he finds it so fucking cute that i’d pull a ridiculous stunt like this. afterward, when i pout about his lack of reaction, he just shrugs and says that he was, “too focused on more important things,” i.e. having me 🤦 infuriating!
reiner – poor reiner freezes like a prey creature the second “pee snake” rolls off my tongue. he doesn’t go soft (his need to breed and my soft body have him hard enough to cut diamonds at even the most inopportune moments), but he stares at me with utter perplexity for an uncomfortable amount of time—so much time that i’m about to apologize when he finally says, “i’m going to pretend i didn’t hear that.” and it doesn’t come up again until pillow talk because he’s still genuinely confused and i <3 being a troll 💀
