#jae fluff

The elevator dings, signalling its arrival.

Jae swears the door slides open at a snail’s pace. He’d already been late  for the last few gigs – he couldn’t afford to not be on time today, unless he wanted his head on the chopping block. He quickly jogs in, pressing for the ground floor, but he’s so absorbed in getting in before the ahjumma arrives that he fails to notice your presence.

Your eyes meet in a split second, and he flashes you an apologetic look, before pressing the doors shut.

That bastard!

“I’m sorry!” His voice filters through the rapidly closing doors as you stand there in shock, refusing to believe that your neighbour just slammed the elevator door shut in your face. 

Needless to say, you were late to your dinner. 

For the next few days, whenever your line of sight falls upon that particular neighbour’s door, you feel your blood boiling underneath your skin.

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You settle into the elevator, pressing your AirPods into your ears, ready to start the morning commute and face the day. It’s a Monday, the start of a new week, and you already miss the soft crinkle of your sheets under your skin. 

Just as the doors slide close, a hand sticks in between the doors, prompting it to re-open.

Your eyebrow lifts at the new intruder.

And in walks none other than your menace of a neighbour.

He’s sporting large wire-rimmed, round glasses this time. A shoulder bag hangs upon his lithe frame, and headphones sit snug around his neck. A small ponytail sits atop his head.

You squint your eyes at it, staring.

He sucks in a breath, caught off guard by your presence. He nods his head, almost sheepishly, averting his gaze towards his old Converse, worn from years of sticky bar floors and spilt coffee. 

The elevator doors slide close, trapping the two of you inside the metal cell.

You know it’s rude to stare, but the contrast between the tiny ponytail and the rest of him (or what you know of him, at least) is too stark to ignore.

He seems to feel the weight of your gaze, following your line of sight before patting his head down with his hand, wincing internally at the realisation that he forgot to fix his hair after brushing his teeth and washing his face.

The air is tense and silent for the rest of the ride. You have nothing to say to him. He seems to be mulling over the right words.

The doors slide open, just as his lips part. 

“I’m sorry again.” He calls out, voice small as he realises the chances of you hearing him are slim. You’d  already stepped forward, feet crossing the threshold of the elevator. He continues anyway. “I know it was a pretty rude thing to do, but I couldn’t afford to be late again. I… I’m sorry.”

You stop in your tracks. You don’t say anything, or turn around. You simply nod lightly, before continuing with the rest of your day.

Jae lets out a breath he didn’t even realise he was holding.

Let me make it up to you, he wants to say, but the words die in his mouth.

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It’s early – way too early, and Jae tries but fails miserably to rub the sleep from his eyes. He yawns, wondering to himself how anyone could possibly function at the crack of dawn. 

(Or at least, it feels like the crack of dawn for him, a seasoned night owl. It is, in fact, quarter past seven, which is a perfectly normal time for human beings to start their days.)

He glances at the clock.

Eight minutes, Jae reckons. Eight minutes before the morning rush starts and he’d have to interact with other people like a normal, functioning member of society. 

A sense of dread settles over him.

For now, he absentmindedly wipes over the surface of the coffee machine, the paddle, the coffee grinder – his metal companions for the morning shift. To his left, just at the corner of his eyes, sits  his notebook, open to his recent work.

It’s an uptempo, pop beat coupled with a melody that sits easily on the ears. He has the instrumentals locked in, but the lyrics are a different story. It’s taking him longer than usual to come up with a cohesive narrative, and by this point, he’s tired of constantly hitting dead ends.

The windchime sings, signalling the arrival of customers. The early summer air blows through the open doors, the fresh scent of newly sprouting trees mingling with the lingering aroma of coffee beans in the air.

“Welcome to – Oh?”

Jae stops, tongue tied. An uneasy smile works its way onto his lips. He tries to conceal his surprise with his best customer service face. “Good morning, what can I get for you?”

Your eyes meet his in recognition. A look passes through your face for a mere second, before you recover your composure. You flash him a polite, tight-lipped smile. “Morning, can I get an iced latte please?”

He pulls a plastic cup from the organised pile, scribbling onto its side with a black marker. “Iced latte, coming right up.” He smiles , keying in your order and readying the card machine.

You linger by the counter. The cafe is empty, as it usually is. You’d tried  to come in earlier to beat the morning rush and get your caffeine hit before stepping onto the train.

It’s funny, you think to yourself. You’ve  lived in this apartment for months now, and frequented  this cafe a few times a week, but you’ve  never once crossed paths with your barista neighbour. Perhaps the timing never lined up properly, until now.

“Iced latte!” The voice you’ve  only heard from the echoes along your hallway or within the confines of the metal elevator rings throughout the empty space.

The owner of said voice, whose eyes were partially concealed by his too-long fringe and a cap, shines slightly as he passes you your drink. You find it hard not to notice the dark eyebags sitting below his brown orbs.

“Thank you.” You mumble , voice small. You feel uncertain, as though you should say something more, but decide against it. After all, he did close the elevator door on you.

“Wait!” Jae calls out, stopping you from leaving. He disappears behind the counter for a second, and re-emerges with a brown bag. He passes it to you.

“What…?”

“It’s on the house, I hope you like chocolate chip cookies.” He explains sheepishly. “An apology for what I did last time. I truly am sorry.” He says , voice and eyes both laced with sincerity.

“I… Thank you. It’s fine.” You reply, accepting the cookie, but unsure of what to make of the interaction. The words linger in the air for a moment too long.

“Jae.” He blurts out, a desperate attempt to fill the silence. Inwardly, he cringes at himself. “My name is Jae. You’re 918, right?”

A small grin spreads across your lips. You nod, “Yeah, I’m Y/N.”

“Well, I won’t keep you. See you around, Y/N.”

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It’s funny, because you swear you’ve never seen Jae at the cafe before, until that day.

And then, all of a sudden, he starts popping up everywhere.

The elevator, the cafe, the recycling bins downstairs, at the convenience store across the road, by the bus stop. 

You searched it up late last night. It’s called the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon; the frequency illusion – the phenomenon of suddenly noticing something, or rather, someone, and then seeing it appear everywhere around you.

Six minutes.

There’s not much time until your bus comes, and if you miss this one, you’d have to squish and be squished in the next one. You briefly consider skipping coffee this morning, but a yawn tears through your soul, reminding you of just how late you stayed up last night.

This won’t do.

You push past the cafe’s double doors, feeling the scent of freshly brewed coffee enveloping your fatigued body.

That, and a now familiar voice.

“Morning!” He’s rather chirpy today, you think to yourself as you approach the counter. “The usual?”

You nod, stifling a yawn. Wordlessly, you go through the motions of a cafe regular, pulling out your phone to pay and passing Jae your loyalty card. 

“Long night?” He asks from beyond the steam and screams of the coffee machine. 

You shake your head. “No, just bad sleep.”

He laughed, eyes glinting teasingly. “Have you ever considered that perhaps your caffeine addiction is messing with the quality of your sleep?”

You narrow your eyes at him. “Don’t take my one single joy away from me.”

Jae pulls his hands up in surrender. “I’m just saying, I know I work in a cafe and all and we profit immensely from this addiction of yours, but cutting down wouldn’t hurt.”

You pout, arms reaching out for your savior; your beloved iced latte. “I’ll consider it.” 

He reaches across the counter with your coffee, but not before pretending to pull it back. Your hands follow the direction of the plastic cup a little too closely, fingers brushing his with a feather light touch. 

“Wow, you really do have a problem.” 

“Shut up.” You scold. “I’m leaving!”

“Oh, one sec.” He hands you another brown bag, this one much larger than before. “I messed up an order – there’s two slices of cheese instead of one. I’d usually just play dumb, but you know how particular the neighbour ahjumma is with her ham and cheese croissants.”

You laugh, because you in fact have no clue about this whatsoever. You just take his word for it. “Given how much free food you’re dishing out to customers, you’re probably running a loss at this rate.”

“Not just any customer, just you.” Jae teases, a playful lilt in his voice.

You wave at him, looking at your app for the next bus.

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It’s the weekend, and the weather outside is smiling at you, beckoning you to leave the confines of your house. 

You comply, pulling on a simple t-shirt and shorts, and tying your hair back in an attempt to look somewhat neat. You step into your slides, grab your keys and let your feet guide you towards your recent obsession. Everyday, you found yourself in one of three places – your home, your office, or the cafe downstairs.

“Welcome to – Oh?” A curious laugh punctuates the unfinished sentence. “It’s the weekend!”

“I know.” You reply breezily, leaning across the counter. “I’m addicted, remember?”

Jae laughs, and you’re suddenly struck by how familiar it sounds in your ears, like a memory you keep reliving, over and over again. “You really are. The usual?”

You hum in agreement. “Yes, and…” You trail off, eyes travelling across the pastries on display in the fridge. It’s the weekend, after all. You make up your mind in an instant. “And a chocolate chip cookie, please.”

“Coming right up.” He nods, firing the coffee machine up.

You linger by the counter, your usual spot, not really bothering to find a seat. You prefer to be in his company anyways. 

“Any plans for today?” He asks casually, just as he shovels ice and pours milk into a plastic cup.

You shake your head, pulling your phone out to pick up where you left off from last night. “Not much – laundry, chores, groceries.”

“What are you up to?” Jae wonders, setting your iced latte down on the counter top. He attempts to peek past the coffee machine, but to no avail.

You hum absentmindedly. “Hmm, sudoku. I’m not really good at it though.” 

“Pass it over.”

You lift your eyebrow, doubtful. “Really?”

“You’d be surprised.”

Considering you have nothing to lose, you hand your phone over, in exchange for the iced latte. You take a big sip, allowing the caffeine to flow through your veins. You shut your eyes and sigh appreciatively.

“Addict.” Jae scoffs, watching you with a teasing glint in his eyes, before turning his attention to your puzzle.

He remains silent for a moment, studying the screen. “You’re nearly there.” He begins. “But I think you need to take a few more risks.”

“What do you mean?” You lean forward, trying to get a glimpse of what he’s seeing that you clearly aren’t. 

You get all up in his personal space, staring at your phone without paying any attention to the way Jae’s breath hitches in his throat. The scent of your freshly washed hair invades his senses, and for a second, he’s not sure whether he wants to take a deep inhale or hide away in the storeroom out back.

“Jae, what do you mean? I don’t get it.” You stare, willing the right numbers to appear in the right boxes.

He clears his throat. Focus. “I mean, you can just take guesses to eliminate your choices. Like, see here?” He points to a pair of boxes in the corner of the board. “The eight could go here, or there right? So you can just take a guess. And if it’s wrong, you’ll know immediately where it’s meant to go.”

You mull over his words, “I guess you’re right… How are you so good at this?” You wonder aloud, looking up to stare into his eyes. You feel your heart stutter in your chest at the closeness. You swear you could count his eyelashes if you focused. 

“Uhm,” He gulps. He tries to compose himself, fingers reaching for the brown paper bag, long forgotten. “Your cookie.”

“Thanks.” You mumble, quickly accepting it and taking a bite. You wait patiently for his response.

“Yeah, my sister used to play heaps. We passed a sudoku book back and forth on the back pews of Sunday church when we were kids.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at the mental image your mind conjures up at his description. “Really?”

He bites his lip, a shy smile gracing his features. “Yeah, pretty lame, huh?”

You shake your head. “No, just a bit nerdy.”

“Sounds about right.”

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The days pass in a whirlwind. 

Your newfound routine gives you comfort. You find yourself looking forward to waking up to a new day, and another cup of coffee from your neighbour-turned-barista. 

(You didn’t know it then, but neither did he. And the lingering conversations and warm exchanges prompted him to request more morning shifts, and to be home earlier, and to get to bed at reasonable times – just so he could be the best version of himself when he greets you in the morning.)

Early summer rolls into the rainy season, and the rain fades away to autumn. As the weather grows colder, you pull on more layers to keep warm. And yet, ironically, it feels like you are slowly, but surely, peeling back the layers of yourself.

(For him, of course.)

It’s a chilly morning, and you still haven’t let up on the iced lattes. You walk into the cafe, appreciating the warmth of the heaters in the cozy space. 

“You’re a bit late today.” He remarks, pushing the iced latte across the counter, ready for your arrival.

You laugh, waving to greet him. The two of you dance a familiar tango – you pay, and he stamps your loyalty card. “Thanks for being prepared. I took the day off today.”

“Oh, how come?” He asks, fingers fiddling with his pen. His notebook lay open, long forgotten.

“Gotta go to the hospital.” You reply, pouting as you sip your morning coffee. 

His eyes shoot up in alarm. “Hospital? Everything okay? You feeling alright?”

“Woah, woah.” You scoff, finding his worried expression endearing. “Aren’t you a little too invested in my health, as my barista?”

He averts his gaze, hands gesturing vaguely in the air. “You know, this cafe would crumble without your patronage.”

You laugh at that. “Yeah, well, you can’t get rid of me that easily. Just a routine checkup, nothing too serious, I hope.”

Jae breathes a sigh of relief. “Well, that’s good to hear. As your barista, I hope you will remain healthy so I can keep enabling your caffeine addiction.” He disappears briefly from behind the counter, and emerges with another brown bag. “A sweet treat, for good luck.”

He sets it down on the counter, next to his notebook. You reach towards it, but your eyes linger on the page. Chicken scrawls fill the lines. “What is it?” You ask, curious.

Jae sighs deeply. “A song I’ve been working on for ages, but it just refuses to come out right.”

“You write songs?”

He looks at you, eyes vulnerable. “Uhm, yeah. I sing too, and play the guitar. And the keyboard, if it’s required.”

“Oh!” The pieces of the puzzle fall into place. “That’s why you carry around a guitar!”

“No,” He begins, voice uncertain. “That’s because I play in a band.”

“You play in a band? What?!”

“Why are you so surprised?” He laughs nervously, unsure of what to make of your constant line of questioning. 

“Nothing, it’s just… You’re… Don’t take this the wrong way, but you don’t necessarily fit the image of a band member.”

Jae clasps his hand across his chest in faked agony. “What does that mean?!”

“I mean, no offence, but you said you used to play sudoku with your sister in church. You’re telling me that boy grew up to play in a band?”

His lips formed a pitiful frown. “Hey, now you’re hurting my feelings. And yes, maybe you don’t really know me that well – have you considered that?”

You open your mouth, but fail to come up with a smart response. “I’m sorry,” You say  sincerely. “I guess we don’t really know each other that well for two people who spend most mornings together.”

“Now you’re just making it sound romantic, Y/N.”

Your eyes meet his, holding his gaze for a few moments. The air is strung high with an unspeakable tension.

You take another sip in an effort to dissipate the awkward air, before staring at his notebook. “Can I take a look?”

Jae nods, a sense of deja vu washing over him. “Are you gonna help me with my lyrics cos I helped you with your sudoku?”

“Perhaps.” You mumble, reading his words. It was messy, barely legible, with a slight slant – somehow, it was so him. “Don’t underestimate me, you’re looking at the eighth grade spelling bee champion.”

He steps away to clean the dishes, leaving you to your devices. 

When he comes back, you’re already scribbling across the page.

“How much do the words have to rhyme?” You ask, curious. 

He hums. “Not exactly, but they do have to flow naturally together. I don’t really know – it’s hard to explain, I just go with what feels right. But for some reason, I’m really struggling with this one.”

You nod, considering your options. “I’ll see what I can do.”

───────────

All day, at the office, you run your fingers across a single piece of paper. 

A five-inch piece of parchment with the name of a band you never heard of, until this morning. A date, a time, and a venue not too far away from your office.

You’ve been thinking about it all day – what his voice would sound like, what you should wear, how the audience would react. Your colleagues had to tap you repeatedly on your shoulder to ensure you were paying  attention during the weekly stand-up.

And yet, nothing could calm the persistent hammer of your heart against your ribcage. 

You met him first, as the annoying neighbour that slammed the elevator doors in your face.

You got to know him, slowly, as the barista who made your iced coffee every morning with a warm smile.

Tonight, you’ll see a whole other side of him. The performer; the artist underneath the overgrown fringe and wide-rimmed glasses and black hoodies. A different Jae.

It strikes  you, then. The layers of him are  slowly getting revealed to you, one by one, each more interesting than the last, and you want  nothing more than to keep peeling back the layers of him.

Three more minutes…

You think to yourself, willing the hands of the clock to move faster so you could get ready to leave.

───────────

“Two minutes til showtime!” The stagehand calls in a booming voice.

On your trip back from the bathroom, you catch him standing in the corner, alone, leaning against a wall.

His fingers twirl the guitar pick over and over, a nervous tick.

You debate between leaving and staying. As your thoughts circle in your head, you watch him pull out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. 

This wouldn’t do.

You walk up to him and wave.

He sees you crossing the room and flashes you an uncertain smile.

“What are you doing here?” He asks softly, voice small. “You’re not gonna get front row seats at this rate.”

“I’m here on very important business.” You tease, a grin working its way onto your lips. Your gaze flickers towards the pack, and for a second you contemplate whether what you are about to do will cross an unspoken boundary, but you think, to hell with it. 

“I’m not –” He begins.

You wordlessly reach out towards his hand, holding his trembling ones in yours. “No,” you spoke softly, with a quiet determination. “You won’t. You don’t need it to do well out there, trust me.”

Jae looks at you for a second, in awe. He looks away when the tightness in his chest gets too much. “How do you know?” He whispers, voice so small that your heart stutters in your chest.

“Because,” You take a deep breath, knowing that your words have the potential to make or break his confidence. “You’ve done this before, and you’ll do it again. Because you’ve conquered your nerves in the past and gave the audience a great show. Because you’ve performed and rehearsed these songs so many times. Because I helped you with the lyrics for one of them.” You pause, tightening your grip on his hands, and staring deep into his eyes. The lighting around you is scarce, and you can just make out your own reflection in his large glasses. But beyond that, his eyes are fixated solely on you, unwavering. “And because I believe in you.”

“Y/N,” Jae lets out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding. It feels like a huge burden has been lifted off his shoulders. “I –”

“It’s showtime!”

A worried look passes across his eyes. You hold his shoulders, giving them a reassuring squeeze. “Go, I’ll be watching from the front row.”

“Promise?” He asks, uncertain.

You nod vigorously, knowing right then and there that you would promise him the world if you could.

───────────

The performance passes in a blur. 

One moment you’re jamming to the addictive beats, the next you’re being swept off your feet by Jae’s sweet, sweet vocals. You welcomed it all – moving your body to the music and allowing yourself to be serenaded by the band’s frontman.

All that dancing and cheering makes you parched, and you want to prolong the buzz and adrenaline with a glass of something chilled and strong.

“Hey, can I –”

“Gin and tonic for her, please. And a pint of beer for myself.” A voice, low and familiar, spoke next to you.

You turn towards it, and settle your eyes on the owner. He leans on the bar counter, all 6 feet of him, messy hair with sweat threatening to drip down his chin, staining his graphic tee and ripped jeans. He flashes you a teasing smirk.

“Jae,” You breathe, unsure of what to say or do after being completely moved by his performance and stage presence. You had no idea that your klutz of a neighbour could get the crowd going like that, like they were hypnotised by a magician. This is an entirely different side of him that you’ve never seen before, and you’re not entirely sure how to interact with it.

“Y/N,” Jae hands you your drink, and clinks your glass in a toast. “Did you enjoy yourself?”

“Yes.” You answer without hesitation. Taking a sip of your drink, you feel the cool liquid rush down your throat, doing little to calm your quickening pulse.

“I could tell.” He laughs as he takes a swig of his beer. Jae considers you for a second, eyeing you with a certain intensity that makes you warm both inside and out. “You were having a bit too much fun. It was a bit distracting, honestly.” He continues in a playful tone.

You look at him questioningly. 

Instead of answering, he just moves closer to you. The bar is getting more crowded by the minute as people try to refill their drinks after the performance. Your breath hitches in your throat as you feel the heat from his warm body radiate towards you. Bar goers begin yelling out their orders, and along with the music blasting from the speakers, it becomes harder and harder to hear each other.

Jae places a steady arm around your shoulders, shielding you from the wave of people moving towards the counter. He leans close to your ears, his breath causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. “How about we get some food? It’s way too hectic here.”

You’re not sure what comes over you, then. Maybe it’s the close proximity with Jae that messes with your brainwaves, or the reassuring squeeze of your shoulders, or perhaps just the comfort of leaning against his sturdy form in a room full of strangers. You reach within yourself and find the courage to utter the next few words, “Are you taking me out on a date?”

“Am I what?”

“I’m not repeating myself!” You laugh, ushering him towards the general direction of the exit. 

He trails closely behind you, pretending that he didn’t hear you. “Say it again! I can’t hear –”

You shoot a pointed look towards him once the two of you make it outside. The constant pushing and shoving ensures you’re pressing flush against him, his arm never straying far from you. 

The night air is chilly, and you feel a shiver work its way through your bones. Wordlessly, he pulls out a hoodie from his backpack that you didn’t even realise he had with him. Jae helps you pull it over your head, and work your arms through the sleeves. You’re momentarily winded by how his scent swallows you whole. When you emerge from the oversized hoodie, completely engulfed by the fabric, he helps to sweep your hair away from your eyes. 

He smiles at you like you’re the best thing that ever happened to him. His gaze is soft and sparkly, his gentle touch lingering on you. You wish it stays there forever.

“Jae…”

“C’mon, let’s get out of here.”

───────────

And that’s how you ended up back where it all started – within the four walls of the elevator.

Lingering touches, harmonious giggles, and smiles that hide more than you’re both willing to put into words. 

The two of you stumble in unceremoniously, drunk off of something richer and more potent than alcohol.

If you were asked to recall what your conversation was about, you probably wouldn’t be able to give an accurate recount. Your ears could only register the bright notes of his laughter, high and loose, yet familiar all the same. Something about the set, perhaps, or his nerves, but you really couldn’t pay attention to much else other than his warm body against yours.

It feels like you were wrapped up in a warm bubble, away from the rest of the world. As the elevator ascends to the ninth floor in what feels like the longest ride ever, you find yourself welcoming the touch of his arms as they snake around your hips, pulling you real close.

Jae presses his lips against your hair, deeply inhaling the whiffs of shampoo that he only ever caught briefly on your morning coffee runs. It makes him lightheaded, but in the best way. “Hmm,” He hums, and you feel rather than hear him mumble against your skin. “You know, I love being around you.”

You giggle against his chest, fingers absentmindedly playing with the belt loops of his jeans. “Really?”

“Yeah, I was never much of a morning person, but somehow you changed me.” Jae pulls away slightly, and you have to actively fight the whine that works up your throat at the lack of close contact. “I love how I am around you.”

“Me too.” You admit, looking deep into his eyes, unconsciously nodding and moving closer to him. Now that you got a taste of him, you couldn’t bear being apart. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

A few moments of silence follows, as the two of you sway in each other’s arms. Jae’s eyes break away from yours and travel slightly down, down, and down, towards your lips. As if on cue, you bite on your lips, heartbeat thundering against your ribcage.

“Don’t,” He groans, pained. “Don’t do that, you’re so distracting…”

You laugh a little, but refuse.

Jae reaches to cup your face in his hand, his thumb working to pull your lips away. “Can I…” He breathes, leaning in on instinct. 

Ten seconds, you think, until you can finally indulge in your curiosities (recently, your waking thoughts are preoccupied by how it feels to have his lips touch yours).

“Can I… you know?”

You couldn’t help laughing at his nervous demeanour. “What? I don’t know.”

“Y/N, please…” Jae whines, his thumb caressing the side of your cheek with a feather light touch, conveying his pleas. He hopes you get the message and stop torturing him already, for goodness sake. For what it’s worth, he’s waited long enough.

You shrug your shoulders, settling deeper into his hold, enjoying the skin-to-skin contact with someone who was always in your orbit but felt just beyond your reach. 

Jae licks his own lips nervously. “I… Kiss… Can I –”

You don’t let him finish his sentence. 

You grab him by the collar and pull him towards you. The moment your lips touch, the haziness in your mind clears. Nothing matters in that moment other than the feeling of him against you, pressed so impossibly close. It’s like you woke up from a deep slumber, refreshed, or the first satisfying breath after being trapped in an enclosed place. Time slows as your lips move languidly against his, your hands exploring on its own accord, first trailing down his shirt, then up to hook behind his neck, clutching his hair in earnest. At the same time, he walks you backwards and presses you against the metal wall. His palm, big and warm, cradles your face in his grasp, as though you’re his most prized possession. You let him, melting in his touch.

The seconds pass in this way, the two of you too lost in each other to care about anything else around you. And you want to keep going too, if not for the inconvenience that is breathing. 

You pull away reluctantly, filling your lungs with fresh air, taking a moment to recover because – what was that? You feel like your brain is turning into mush.

 Jae can’t seem to get enough. He holds you close against him, his arms tightening around your middle, taking a big inhale as he buries his face in your neck. 

“You have no idea…” He begins, breathless. “No idea how long I’ve waited to do that…”

You just giggle softly in response, not trusting your lips to form words yet. You just snuggle closer to him.

“Do you wanna come back to mine? I’ll order food.”

You nod shyly.

“Also, what’s taking this lift so long…” He tears away from you briefly to stare at the buttons, only to realise that neither of you even pressed them in the first place.

Laughter spills from your lips at the mishap, clearly both of you were too caught up in each other to notice.

And so the rest of the night ends with lots of fried chicken, cheesy rom-coms and cuddling on his couch. 

(Of course, he lets you steal the duvet at night, preferring to spoon you instead in search of warmth.)

(He lets you steal his hoodie too, and a t-shirt or two. Or a few.)

Tick…tick…tick.

Time passed as slowly as the molasses you poured into your cookie batter. Warmth radiated from the oven but you still felt cold in your sweats. Feeling lazy, you hadn't changed from them this morning but rather laid around all day. You only recently pushed past the unwavering exhaustion to eat a quick dinner and make you and your lover a treat. Cookies in the oven, you started on some tea.

“Ah shit,” you whispered to yourself quickly bringing your finger to your mouth in an attempt to soothe the ache from your finger hitting into the side of the hot pot.

Your dry eyes blinked as your thoughts wandered, and you lowered the heat while continuing to stir the bubbling beverage. Even though it was only 8 o'clock, the week had worn you out, leaving your head feeling heavier than ever. Taking your tea off the burner you checked the weather again and re-read Jae’s last messages.

Jae-Jae <3 ~

*This bug screwed us over.* - 6:34 pm

*we're gonna eat dinner here* - 6:45

*be home in an hour xoxo* - 7:23 pm

Jae had gotten up before you, having been called into work on a weekend due to a coding issue that you were too sleepy to fully understand when he tried to explain it to you. Your brows furrowed as you checked your watch for the hundredth time. Anxiously you checked outside the window as the gentle snowflakes that were fluttering down picked up speed.

Absent-mindedly, you went to fetch two mugs, running your slightly stinging fingers under some cold water as you rinsed them. Your two cats, Peanut and Butter, brushed against your legs, longing for attention and a taste of what you were preparing.

Carefully dodging the felines under your feet you placed the now steaming mugs on a tray before rushing to take out the cookies.

Perfectly golden and prettily plated, you set the cookies on the tray before cleaning up after yourself and heading to take a quick shower.

Refreshed yet somehow colder you nabbed one of your boyfriends sweaters before grabbing your phone to check your messages once again.

Beep! Beep! The sound of an incorrect password reached your ears before you could unlock your phone, followed by the exasperated swear of your lover. With a laugh, you unlocked and opened the door, quickly throwing yourself into his arms. He stumbled back slightly, his arm instinctively wrapping around you. The cold wind lashed at your skin through his sweater and your thin house clothes, but you hardly cared.

“Baby, it’s freezing. Let me get inside,” he said.

Your body warmed to the wistfulness in his voice as he squeezed you tightly and peppered your head and cheeks with his cold lips.

“You took soooo long,” you whined, waddling together back into the house. “I was soooo bored!”

“I thought you were going to catch up on some sleep,” Jae replied, using the few seconds you were willing to let him go to remove his coat and hang it in the closet. You reached up and pulled off his hat, dusting the snowflakes from it.

“Turns out I couldn’t sleep without you,” you said as you pulled him back into your embrace. “My poor baby, you’re freezing!”

“I just barely beat the snow. I feel bad for anyone who works further away than I do, the highway is already getting icy.”

“ I can’t believe they called you guys in on a weekend and in this weather, no less.”

“Assholes. And it was a mistake on their end.”

He gave you a tighter squeeze. “But enough about them… you smell so amazing… and warm.”

He tightened his grip again, pulling giggles from you as his cold cheek pressed against your neck, seeking warmth.

“I made cookies and tea,” you said proudly, pulling back to look at him. The bags under his eyes were heavy, but his smile still lit up his face as he gazed at you.

“I’m going to go shower,” he said, trying to pry your arms from around him.

“Wait.” You pouted.

He chuckled. “I’ll be back, and then we can relax.”

“Hurry.”

“Hurrying.”

You lived together and saw each other often, but your free time was limited. It felt like forever since you had hugged him like that. With one of you working overtime while the other left early, your daily life felt empty whenever you found yourself without each other.

Sitting in thought you blew on your tea between sips, the mug warming your cold numbed hands. Your thoughts filled with him like oxygen filled your lungs, and the warmth of the tea filled your chest.

Through the ups and downs of life, like a raft you kept each other above the floods of burn outs and constant burdens. You relied on those soft moments with Jae to help you heal from the exhausting weeks that crowded your schedules.

Jae laid his head on your lap, pulling you from your thoughts.

“Your hair is still a bit wet, love,” you giggled.

“I couldn't keep waiting,” he replied, turning to bury his face into your belly, causing his glasses to slip askew. You took them off for him and placed them on the coffee table.

Picking up a cookie you gave him a bite before taking one yourself. Warm in chewy you savored the sweet taste on your tongue. His hand reached up, popping the last bite of cookie into his mouth.

Jaes hands snaked around your waist, tickling your sides.

“What the heck, Jae?” you laughed, trying not to spill your drink.

His response was the delightful sound of his laughter as he sat up and took your mug from you.

He took a long sip before nodding his head in approval. “This is also very good.”

“Yours is right there.” You reached for your mug, but he pulled it away.

“Nah, yours tastes better.”

“They're exactly the same,” you said, rolling your eyes but still smiling.

“Impossible.”

“And why is that?” Your eyebrow quirked in response to his change of tone.

“Because yours tastes like you.” His eyes tracked your lips as you licked them.

“Well, then why drink that when you can get a taste from the source?” you said with a tilt of your head.

It felt so good to banter with him like this. The butterflies in your stomach danced warmly and familiar as you watched him put down the mug and turn back to you. Grabbing your hand, he pulled you to him, your legs settling around him as you comfortably fell into his lap.

Holding his face, your lips hovered close together, buzzing with joy just to be near each other.

“Gosh, I missed you,” you whispered against his lips.

Jae's lips brushed softly against yours, a gentle knock at your body's door. His fingertips sent chills across your skin as his caresses moved up your thighs to your hips, sliding beneath your shirt, and to your back. Your skin flexed and relaxed under his touch.

Your thighs squeezed around him, as your body craved more.

You pulled at his shirt and he chuckled softly against your neck, his hands gently gripping your arms to pause your desperate motions.

Jae pulled off his shirt before removing his sweater from your body along with your shirt. With flushed cheeks and blown pupils you watched his eyes devour you. Your chest heaved as Jae’s hands began once again to caress you, his mouth leaving hungry bites against your burning body. The grinding of hips came naturally as you both desperately desired the next portion of the intimacy you missed.

Throwing your head back you shut your eyes and allowed your other senses to enjoy the moment. Open-mouth kisses and gasps filled your ears, the smell of his body wash and freshly baked cookies, the warmth of his body radiating into you in electrifying ecstasy.

“Honestly,” Jae said between kisses, “my back hurts way too much to continue this on the couch.”

Your laughter broke the kiss and almost made you fall off his lap, but he caught you with hands wrapped securely around you.

“Sorry,” he said, holding your skin flush against his, hearts beating in sync.

“No worries.” You stood up, intertwining your fingers with his as you pulled him up with you. “Besides, I don’t like it when the cats watch us; it feels weird.”

Jae laughed, the sound light and infectious, as he followed you into the dimly lit hallway. “You know they don’t even care, right? They just want to be around us.”

You shook your head. “I don't know. It feels like they’re watching too intently.”

“Sorry Peanut and Butter.” Jae whispered, shutting the door quickly behind you two, locking the perverts out and only leaving behind their meows of protests.

You stretched out on the bed, heart racing with excitement.

Leaning against the doorframe Jae grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief as he watched your body in full.

“Now I see where the cats get it from.” You laughed.

With your finger you beckoned him closer. “Are you just gonna stand there or are you gonna join me?

Seductively you slipped your thumbs into the sides of your shorts, catching your underwear as well, as you began to shimmy a little and pull them both off.

With a single, smooth motion, Jae closed the distance between you, his hands gliding up your thighs and grabbing your hands, igniting every nerve in your body. "That's my job," he whispered, breath warm against your ear.

His hands gripped your waist, his eyes roaming over you and drinking in your form up close in the low light of your shared bedroom.

You watched as his tired eyes darkened, arousing desire reflecting in them as he dipped down and captured your lips in a searing kiss. Jae’s hands roamed lower, exploring the curve of your hips before slipping underneath your shorts. His fingers brushed slender and electric against your delicate bud. His lips hungrily swallowed your gasps as the skill of his touch sent waves of pleasure rippling through you.

"God, I missed you all day." he groaned as he pulled back just enough to drink you in once again. The sight of you, vulnerable and eager, sent his senses into a frenzy.

Your own hands took the opportunity with him raised above you to roam along his chest and down to his waistband. Unsanctimoniously you grabbed him as you pushed on his waistband and pulled at his cock, freeing him from the confines of his clothing.

Jae let out a shaky breath, his eyes rolling back slightly at your touch.

Feeling restless and ready you whined as he slowly pulled down your shorts and underwear, kicking them off the rest of the way.

“Jae… the day was far too long for you to be playing around,” you complained as he pulled your hands away from him pinning them above you.

He chuckles at your neediness before letting go of your wrist and sitting up.

Jae's fingers trailed down your body before settling on your waist and pulling you towards him. Gripping your hips, he pushed into you and scattered stars into your vision.

Every thrust sent fireworks through your vision but that didn't stop you from trying to take in the look of pure ecstasy on his face when Jae felt your walls squeeze around him.

You could feel the tension building between you, a delicious pressure that promised a long overdue release. One hand reached for your clit, nearly throwing you over the edge as your bodies collided against each other. Normally you would hold out longer but your head was already spinning.

“Cum for me baby.” The low whisper of his voice was enough to set you spiraling as your body shook and your walls fluttered and squeezed his cock.

“Just like that,” he encouraged, his voice thick with desire, urging you on. You could feel him deep within you, every movement sending you higher into your orgasm. The sensations were intoxicating, and you surrendered completely, allowing the moment to consume you, your senses bursting in a kaleidoscope of pleasure. You felt him soon after, his hot seed spilling atop your chest as you tried to catch your breath.

Looking up you watched him in the glow of the city lights from your window. His eyes fixed on yours, your hearts still racing and bodies glistening with sweat.

"Let's take care of you," he murmured, his voice soft and soothing. He disentangled himself from you before retrieving a warm, damp cloth. After cleaning up, he returned the cloth to the bathroom and flopped back into bed next to you.

Like a moth drawn to a flame, you curled into him. With the covers pulled up to your ears, you let the warmth of his body envelop you, completely cocooning yourself in the moment. Jae's arms snaked around you, his nose burrowing into the crook of your neck as he pulled you impossibly close. Your bodies lay skin to skin, the quietness of the cold night embracing you and pulling you into sleep's welcoming arms.

THANK YOU FOR READING 😊

“So, it needs some TLC.”

“Or a bulldozer,” he quipped, wincing immediately.

Yep, his no-filter business was going to end him up on the couch tonight if he didn’t attempt to reel some of it in.

“I’ll have you know it is structurally sound. I’ve seen the engineer reports from its current owner,” you answered with a glare. “You know better than to judge a book by its cover.”

Jae held his tongue, knowing he had a habit of doing just that. Smiling at you, he nodded. “I’m glad to hear you say, ‘current owner’. Here I thought you’d bought it.”

You didn’t answer immediately, turning your eyes to the house as you worked your jaw. Jae faltered, an awkward laugh leaving him. “You’re thinking about buying it, aren’t you?”

“Hear me out.”

“Oh no. Nope. Nuh-uh, Y/N. You’re serious?!” Jae stared at you incredulously. “It’s like a hundred years old!”

“A hundred and thirty, actually,” you corrected, hands lifting to take purchase at your hips. Your head cocked to the side. “It has charm.”

“The weatherboards are rotting! You can see that, right?”

“It’s an amazing deal.”

He snorted. “Yeah, because it’s a liability.”

“Some would say you were a liability for me, but that didn’t stop me from falling in love with you, now did it?!” you snapped back, and Jae blinked slowly, the tension slumping out of him.

You reached out for him at the same time, your hand trembling. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.”

“It’s true, though, isn’t it? When we met, we were on opposite tracks in life.”

His thoughts slipped back to eight years ago when he had been talking loudly about his opinion about the way his boss was unfairly handling employees, not knowing you were his niece. You could have reported him to your uncle, pulled him up for his big mouth and inability to be quiet. You could have done a lot of things. Instead, you seemed to like that he was unashamed to talk about his thoughts and asked him out for coffee. And whilst he still did have a habit of speaking his mind, he had also discovered a whole new world at your side. One where he felt he was valued, appreciated, and challenged appropriately.

He wasn’t doing a great job of paying that forward right now.

“Okay, tell me.”

You folded your arms across your chest and let out an indignant huff of air. “I don’t know. I should have known better than to run this by you. But as your wife, even if we have separate checking accounts, something this huge is a decision I figured my husband should be in on.”

“Do you want me to get on my knees? Babe, I’ll grovel for your forgiveness if I have to.”

Your lips twitched, but you didn’t say anything as he dropped to his knees.

“Come on, Y/N. Tell me your vision. Let me see what you do.”

“A family home,” you whispered, and Jae blinked, looking back at the wrap-around veranda on the front of the house. In its heyday, the house would have been just that. With kids running around whilst parents lounged on a porch swing. There’d be a dog barking happily in the front yard, and the shutters would gleam in the sunlight. The house would have been the main focal point on this street, standing tall and proud.

Jae got back to his feet, and almost wanted to go onto the property and push against the side of the building and help it stop slumping in decay.

He felt your hand on his bicep then, your eyes wide with hope again. “You see it too, don’t you?”

“Curse you for making me watch The Notebook with you the other week.”

You giggled. “Noah built that house from scratch basically.”

“We might as well be with this one too, Y/N.”

“We?” you edged, biting your lower lip excitedly. “You’ll help me?”

“As if I’m letting you step inside that house alone. What if it fell on you?”

You rolled your eyes and slapped his upper arm. “It’s structurally sound, dammit!”

“You have any keys?”

“How did you know I had access to it?” you mused, retrieving them from your purse and letting the set of three keys jangle in your hand.

Jae took them from you, striding purposely for the front door. You dashed after him. “Oh! The front door kind of sticks so we need to enter from the back door,” you called out nervously, worrying he was going to take back the hope he’d instilled in you.

He merely swung around, dodging an overgrown bush, and headed down the side of the large house to the back entrance. Jae stopped, noticing the decently sized outbuilding next to the garage. You beamed at him as you came up to his side. “Oh, did I not mention I thought you could create an at-home studio for your band? I wasn’t entirely sold when I first looked at the development listing until I saw the potential for you to have a band cave.”

“Band cave,” he echoed, shaking his head. Jae was overwhelmed now, even if he should have expected you to have something just for him up your sleeve. You were always thinking of his needs along with yours.

Turning swiftly, Jae scooped you up into his arms bridal style, grunting when you struggled against him with a shriek. “Hold still or I’ll drop you!”

“Why are you carrying me? Heck, you didn’t even do this on our wedding night.”

“It’s supposed to be when you walk over the threshold of the first home you own,” Jae reminded, and you grinned brightly, peppering his jaw and neck in kisses. His mouth twisted into a lop-sided grin despite your active movement still causing him some concern you might both fall over the threshold of the back door instead.

“You’re on board?” you asked when he set you down on the solid wood flooring inside the door.

Cupping your face in his hands and trying to ignore the musty smell within the home that needed several days of airing out, Jae rested his forehead against yours. “You had me when you said you were imagining this as a place to start a family.”

Kissing him, you then shot him a sly grin. “So, the studio idea didn’t seal the deal?”

“Oh, you know it did, babe.”

You laughed, slipping your arms around his waist and nestled against him. “Thank you for giving me a chance with this idea.”

Jae merely smiled, thinking back to when you gave him a chance all those years ago. No, thank you for taking a chance on me.

_________________

All rights reserved © prettywordsyouleft

He stilled for a moment, taking your wrists in his hands, pressing kisses on both your knuckles, eyes gazing deep into yours before he pinned your wrists next to your head, gripping tight to keep you in place before resuming his previous unrelenting pace. You threw your head back, shaking your head left and right as you whined, your hands twisting in his grasp. Jae leaned forward, his lips meeting your neck as he let out a dragged out moan, holding you in place for a moment as you both panted against each other, engulfed in pleasure. 

You tucked your head into the crook of his neck, arms loosely thrown across his torso as he carried you to his bed, carefully placing you down before propping himself up next to your side, observing you with uneven breaths.

There was something addicting about you, he couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but he wanted to stare at you forever. Even in your current state, he thought to himself, probably not your most presentable image? Loose strands of hair sticking to your sweaty skin, lips reddened and moist, angry red marks on your neck and- Oh shit, he mentally shook his head, this was definitely a sight he wanted to keep forever etched in his mind. 

You exhaled, opening your eyes, turning your body to face him. “Jae?”

“Hmm?” 

“Do the thing.”

He smiled softly at you, “What thing?” 

“You know what thing.” 

Jae let out a breathy laugh. Of course he knew what thing. It had become some sort of a tradition between you two. Every time you guys made love to each other, right before you fall asleep he would shower you with praises and sweet nothings. 

You shifted closer to him, finger tracing his lips, giggling when he sent an air kiss towards you. He took your wrist, noticing the red ring that formed after you wrestled in his grasp. He rubbed his thumb over it, kissing the pair softly, “Mine.” 

You nodded, cheek brushing against the soft sheets, “Yes, yours.” 

“You’re so pretty.” he slurred.

“I’m pretty sure I look like a mess right now.” you said, stifling a laugh.

“But you’re my mess. And that’s beautiful to me.” 

You blinked slowly, focusing your gaze on him as he continued speaking.

“Every time you look at me with those eyes of yours, I get so nervous. Like I wanna be as careful as I can when I’m with you, I don’t want to even do one thing wrong.” 

You opened your mouth to say something, but got cut off by him.

“I know, I know. You always tell me it’s okay to make mistakes. To just, live. But when you laugh around me and you hold my hand, you make me feel like I am alive, you make wanna experience everything with you.”

He kissed your wrists again, eyes on the red marks, “And whenever we’re together, when I hear your soft moans, God I feel so undeserving, I just wanna protect you.” 

You feel yourself blushing, drinking in all his affirmations. 

He entwined your fingers together, “I like just being with you.” 

“Why?” you quipped, voice laced with fatigue, yet your smile never really left your lips.

“You make me feel...new.” he let go of your hand, tracing your shoulder, down to your arm, “Every time I touch you, I feel more alive. Every time your skin meets mine, I feel butterflies in my stomach, dancing all over my skin, they make me feel dizzy, but strangely, more awake.”

You softened, your insides melting. Jae had always been a real, honest person. The way he expressed his thoughts, his words always so raw, so genuine. But especially in these intimate moments, his words were more personal, saved for you only.

it made you realise it was indeed possible to fall in love with someone’s mind. He had such a way with words that you lost count of how many variations of sentences he had used to describe his feelings towards you, each time tugging on your heartstring just as strong as the previous ones. 

“I think I’m falling for you.”  he let out. 

“I’ve fallen for you a long time ago.” you sighed.

“I know, me too. But I think I get why they call it falling in love now. I can’t see the end to it, I’m just descending down into an endless pit, in the best way possible.” 

Your surrounding felt airy, sweet. Like you were floating. You inched closer to him, allowing him to cuddle you, his words replaying like broken records  in your head. You were high on love. 

“How do you do it?” you kissed him.

“Do what?” he kissed you back. 

“Your words.. You’re so good at making me feel loved..” 

His lips felt soft and sweet against your own.

“Have you seen yourself? You’re a goddamn angel.” he chuckled against the kiss, bringing his hand to your hair to stroke your head. You shuffled in his hold, making yourself comfortable against him as you closed you eyes, exhaustion taking over your system. 

Jae softened. He liked seeing your pupils enlarging as your lids slowly descended, until your eyes fluttered close, your lashes making you look innocent in your sleep. He loved how your lips formed a small pout every time your body was consumed bit by bit by sleep as you listen to his soothing voice.

“Goodnight Jae.” you mumbled.

"Goodnight.” he hummed. Holding you close he continued stroking your hair until he heard your breathing slowing down, falling asleep in his arms. He kissed your forehead as he closed his own eyes, your even breaths lulling him to sleep. 

MULTIPARTER

From Now On - after you fall asleep on him {2}

Her Name & His Voice - part of Spiritual Connection {2}

ONESHOT

Neighborly - neighbor au, drip in your roof [3.5k]

In a Classroom - [2.4k]

Crosswords - [2.2k]

At a High School Reunion - [2.1k]

The Wingman - [2k]

Band Sessions: Jae - best friends, the couch incident ✿ [2k]

Just a Second - old, “where the timing was right” [1.9k]

Afraid - new parent, anxiety [1.6k]

English Lessons [1.2k]

When the Hell Did You Break the Vaccum? [1k]

DRABBLES

Boyfriend Material 2.0 - phone calls, dreaming of kids [.9k]

Stars - university, sneaking to the rooftop [.7k]

Overly Romantic Gesture Tht Turns Ur Partner On - M [.6k]

You’re in My Study Spot - “quick make out w me” [.6k]

Just Let Me Finish This Level and I Swear I Will... - M [.5k]

Cuddles - time together after he’s back from tour [.5k]

I’m Trying Not to Kiss You Senseless Right Now - M [.4k]

It Was Just an Excuse to Take You Out, Don’t Sweat It [.4k]

Bite Me - project partners, suggestive [.4k]

TIMESTAMPS

9:16am - a lovely morning message

4:18pm - honey boy

4:23pm - when he trips

6:17pm - surprise

8:02pm - fries and milkshakes

8:25pm - wanted to

8:49pm - cafe, “blueberry?”

10:14pm - a not so pg movie scene

23:13 - horror movie to underrated disney film

TEXTS

Daily Texts w Bf Jae

Everyday Texts w Bf!Jae

Texts w Birthday Boy Jae

Enemies to Lovers - pop tarts, birch tree

Song Prank w Jae

BULLETPOINTS

BestFriend!Jae

Boyfriend!Jae

College AU Jae

Demon!Jae - college, ft Brian

First Kiss w Jae

Friends to Lovers!Jae

Highschool!Jae

Music Majors!Jae

Neighbor!Jae

Pro LOL Player!Jae

PunkrockBoyfriend!Jae - tattoos and piercings

Sing Me - 1am, can’t sleep

Uni!Jae

UniStudent!Jae

You weren’t sure why you were surprised when you saw him read your message almost instantly.

More often than not, when you couldn’t sleep, Jae was also experiencing the same trouble. You imagined that if the two of you shared a room, you would have many -- many -- late night/early morning conversations because neither of you could sleep.

But... you weren’t sure why you would share a room with Jae because he was your friend. One of your very good, very close friends, but not the type to share a room with.

When you saw his typing bubble pop up, you shook your head a little, dismissing the thoughts of being in the same bedroom as Jae.

...What did he mean ‘what’s up’? It was almost three in the morning. Did he think you would be texting him about something important?

Since both of you currently lived alone, you had no qualms about talking on the phone in the middle of the night; nobody else was around for you to disturb, and usually talking to Jae helped ease your mind -- at least enough for you to be able to actually go to sleep.

As soon as you saw his call come through, you accepted it and put him on speakerphone.

“Yo,” he said, his voice groggy and quieter than normal.

“Hey,” you sighed.

“Why can’t you sleep?”

With a groan, you replied, “I just have so much to get done in the next couple of days for work, and I can’t stop thinking about how I’m going to do it all. Trying to schedule out each task and what I need to do if I don’t finish something because then I would have to work on it next week but I have meetings and a big presentation next week so I really can’t afford to add something else to my workload and my dad called me earlier and said my mom is starting to get headaches again but they can’t afford any more treatments especially if she has to stop working so what if I have to move back in with my parents again to help them out and what would I do with all of my furniture and stuff I mean I can’t just sell everything because I’ll need it eventually but I can’t take it with me because there’s no room and I guess I could find a storage place but I don’t know how long I would have to live with them and --”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Jae interrupted gently.

You were honestly glad he did, though. You hadn’t any idea you were going to ramble like that when you’d started talking. Apparently, you were more anxious about things than you even realized.

“Sor -- sorry,” you breathed, your chest heaving slightly from having said so much in so little amount of time.

“No, you don’t need to be sorry,” he told you. “I just wanted to stop you before you hyperventilated.”

A soft, self-deprecating chuckle escaped your lips, and you murmured, “Thanks.”

You heard Jae take a breath and then there was a pause during which you could clearly imagine him pressing his lips together in thought. And then he said, “I’m sorry all this is happening to you right now. If there’s anything I can do, you know you can come to me, right?”

“Yeah, of course,” you replied. Jae was just that kind of friend. He may not always remember your birthday or remember to text you back (really, the only time he was good about that was when he was lying in bed having trouble sleeping), but he was reliable as hell when you needed a listening ear or some advice about something. You could trust him -- and you did, with every fiber of your being.

“You’ll get everything done you need to get done,” he assured you. “I know you, and I know how hard you work. It may seem daunting, but you got it. And if you don’t finish, call me over and I’ll help.”

“Okay,” you chuckled, a soft grin tugging at the corners of your lips. “I will.”

“And... about your family. I know it’s easier said than done, but try not to think about all the things that could happen. Doing that never sends you down a pleasant road. If you focus too much on the future, you’ll forget about the present.”

“Ah, yes, you are an expert at focusing on the present, aren’t you?” you replied teasingly -- because he really, really wasn’t. He was just as bad, if not worse, than you when it came to worrying about tomorrow or the next day or the day after that.

“Dude, shut up,” he scoffed. “I’m trying to help you.”

“I know, I know,” you grinned. “Thank you, really. And I know when the sun rises, everything will seem a lot better.”

“Except for the fact you have to go work on barely any sleep.”

“Very true.”

You let out yet another sigh and rolled onto your back before remembering that it was almost three in the morning, and Jae was up for a reason, too.

“What about you?” you asked. “Why can’t you sleep?”

Unexpectedly, there was a slightly awkward pause after you asked that.

You furrowed your brow gently and opened your mouth to ask Jae if he was all right, but he answered before you got the chance.

“Nothing -- just general -- y’know, same old same old.”

You immediately narrowed your eyes in suspicion.

“Jae,” you chided. “Come on. You can tell me.”

Never in your several years of friendship had Jae ever not told you why he couldn’t sleep. The two of you had crossed that threshold so long ago; you were comfortable telling each other anything.

At least... you thought you were comfortable telling each other anything.

“I... I don’t think I can,” he murmured.

“Of course you can! You know I’ll never judge you, and if it’s something you don’t want anyone else to know --”

“No, it’s not -- it’s not that, Y/N --”

“Then what? Please -- Jae, I just want to help --”

“I can’t sleep because I can’t stop thinking about you,” he blurted out.

You immediately froze, your mouth hanging open mid-sentence but emitting no sound whatsoever. Every single part of you just froze, including your heart.

In your mind, you said ‘Excuse me, what? What do you mean you can’t stop thinking about me? Do you mean in a romantic way?’ But, for some reason, you could find absolutely no way to say that out loud.

As if Jae could actually hear your inner thoughts, though, he said, “I can’t stop thinking about you. I... think I’m falling for you.”

All right, that answered your question, then.

...Jae had feelings for you? For you? Feelings? Jae? You?

“You --” you began, but the next words got lodged in your throat and you couldn’t continue.

Jae let out a very disappointed sigh, and to be honest, it kind of broke your heart. “It’s okay,” he muttered. “I didn’t expect... Things won’t get weird between us, I promise. You can still text me when you can’t sleep.”

You nodded, forcing yourself to choke out an “Okay.”

“Is... there... anything else you want to talk about?” he asked. It was very obvious he was trying his best to be normal, trying his best to push away all the awkwardness his confession had created.

And if he was trying his best, then so should you.

“If you could clone anyone -- person or animal -- who would it be?” you asked.

Jae didn’t answer right away, and you knew -- hoped -- that meant his lips were curving into one of his adorable little grins.

“My --”

“Don’t say ‘myself,’” you interrupted with a laugh.

“Why not?! I could make my clone do all the boring stuff so I can just game and eat and maybe actually get some sleep!”

“You can’t say yourself, that’s just the rule of the game!”

“It’s not a game! You just asked me a question!”

“Well, I’m making it a rule,” you retorted.

“Questions don’t have rules!” Jae argued.

“Mine do.”

“Who would you clone?” he asked.

A grin immediately appeared on your lips, and you said, “I would clone you.”

“Wha -- me? Why me?”

“So I could make you do all my boring stuff so I could just eat and watch TV and sleep.”

Jae burst out laughing, and the sound of it made your heart feel so warm and fluffy. “What? No, no, no, dude,” he protested. “You can’t clone me so I can be your servant, that’s messed up!”

“I can! And I would!” you giggled.

“Okay, so then, I would clone you and do the exact same thing.”

“That’s fair!” you assured him. “But if the clone was actually a carbon copy of me, you know I would never do all the work and let you just sit on your ass, right?”

“Wait, but I thought the clones were more like robots,” he pointed out.

“Who said they were like robots?”

“I don’t know, I just assumed!”

“So, you would make robot me do all your chores while you just sit around and watch?” you asked, hoping the playful smile on your lips wasn’t showing through in your voice.

“You would, too! You brought it up first!” Jae accused, but you could hear the laughter behind his words, and it made your smile grow wider.

“Wow, what a great friend you are,” you replied with teasing sarcasm.

“What the hell, man,” Jae chuckled. “Be quiet.”

This was exactly what you loved about having Jae as a friend. The two of you could go from talking about serious issues one minute to laughing and teasing each other about robot clones the next. He could comfort you and distract you. Help you and amuse you. You truly valued your friendship with him -- more than anything, really.

...Were his romantic feelings going to put a wrench in that? Even though he promised it wouldn’t?

Surprisingly, after you hung up with Jae, you did manage to get some sleep. Only a few hours, but it was enough to have a dream.

And... what a dream it had been.

While some parts had been kinda weird -- as dreams usually were -- the main plot had been that...

Well.

Jae had been your boyfriend.

Holding hands, cuddling, hugging, kissing... the whole deal.

You knew you’d had a dream like this because Jae had admitted he was starting to develop feelings for you, so the idea of being in a romantic relationship with him had been introduced into your brain.

But... did that explain the fact that you woke up feeling... really... nice? That you didn’t want the dream to end? That you wanted to go back to sleep and continue on living that scenario of Jae being your boyfriend?

And did it explain the fact that you spent basically the entire workday thinking about it? And basically the entire rest of the week? And most likely the upcoming weekend?

Well, at least you hadn’t been overthinking and worrying about all the work you needed to get done (which you did get done, by the way). And your dad had called you on Friday afternoon after your mom’s doctor’s appointment, saying she was just fine, so there was that, too.

But as you left work on Friday evening, you found that finishing your workload and receiving good news about your mom’s health only freed up your mind to think even more about your Jae Boyfriend dream.

This was not good.

And it was not good mainly because Fridays were your “Hang out with Jae in the evening” days. It had become tradition sometime last year, and since then, you’d hardly ever missed a week. If you told him you couldn’t make it tonight -- just a few days after he’d confessed his developing feelings for you -- wouldn’t that be just a bit too obvious? Even though your reason for skipping would actually be... not that?

No, you had to hang out with him tonight as you usually did. You had to pretend like everything was as it usually was.

So, when your phone started vibrating as you headed toward the bus stop, a small smile tugged at your lips and you answered without hesitating.

“What are we ordering tonight?” you asked in lieu of a greeting.

“I was thinking chicken,” Jae answered. “Sound good?”

“Absolutely. Just make sure I get my potato wedges this time,” you warned, only half-teasing. The restaurant had forgotten them last time, and while you thoroughly enjoyed the chicken itself, your meal would have been that much better with potato wedges.

Jae chuckled softly, and the sound made your heart do this weird little flippy thing. And the thought of his smile made it flip even more.

“Don’t worry, I will make sure they include your potato wedges -- on penalty of death.”

“Much appreciated. I’m almost to the bus stop, and the bus is pulling up, so I gotta go. See you soon?”

“Yeh,” he murmured. “Safe travels.”

“Bye!” you chirped before quickly hanging up and picking up the pace so you could make it to the stop on time.

As soon as you sat down on the bus after scanning your card, you got out your phone again and pulled up your favorite game. If you simply sat on the bus all the way to Jae’s place with nothing to distract you, you would start thinking about your dream again. And you had to do everything you possibly could to not think about your dream right before you saw him. If you, in any way, held the image of Jae being your boyfriend in your mind when you arrived for your weekly hangout, you felt like you would be giving him false hope.

Jae was too precious to you to do that.

But... even though you focused all of your energy on your phone game the entire bus ride... as soon as Jae opened the door and grinned at you, the imagery from your dream -- your warm, glorious, wonderful dream -- came rushing back to you.

You remembered what it had felt like to hug him. To hold his hand. To kiss him.

“Y/N, you okay?” Jae asked with a slightly furrowed brow.

You jumped a little, not realizing you had been standing there staring as everything about your dream had filled your mind.

“Y--yeah,” you breathed. “Yeah, sorry. Just... long week.”

Jae opened the door wider, and you stepped through, hanging your bag and jacket up on the hooks by his door.

“Have you heard from your parents yet?” he asked as he gently closed the door behind you.

“Oh! Yes, my -- my dad called me just before I left work,” you told him. “All her tests came back fine, so the doctor said there’s nothing to worry about.”

Jae left out a soft sigh of relief, and your heart clenched at the sound of it -- in a good way. He was just such a sweet person to care so much about your mom. How had you never realized how sweet he was?

“The chicken will be here soon,” he told you, once again interrupting your thoughts. “Wanna game while we wait?”

You raised your eyebrows slightly and nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, sure.”

Jae headed over to his couch then, and you followed suit, perching on the cushion next to him and reaching for your favorite game controller on the coffee table.

He barely even got to the start menu of your collectively favorite game before he stopped and turned toward you.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

You jerked a little with surprise and glanced over at him.

“...What do you mean?”

“Something’s wrong, I can tell. It’s not your mom... is it work?”

“No -- no, everything’s fine,” you assured him.

Jae let out another sigh -- this one not of relief but of minor annoyance -- and set down his controller, leaving the start menu playing over and over again on the television screen.

“Come on,” he urged. “I know something’s bothering you. And we tell each other everything. I told you something I would’ve rather not told you... You can trust me, and I want to help.”

You furrowed your brow down at the controller in your hands, your fingers gently running over the buttons without actually pressing them.

He had a point. A pretty good one.

So, just like he had a few days ago, you blurted out your answer. “I had a dream the other night where we were dating and it felt really nice and I’m sure it was just because of what you told me but it still felt really nice and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it and now I just kind of want to kiss you to see what it actually feels like but I don’t want to give you false hope or anything because I really don’t know --”

“It’s okay,” Jae interjected, though his tone was far more casual than you would’ve expected.

You paused, furrowing your brow even more and turning your head to look over at him. “...What’s okay?”

“You can totally kiss me,” he replied with a shrug. “I don’t mind, and I won’t automatically think we’re together. I’m an adult! I know how these things work!”

“...Are you sure?” you asked warily.

“Sometimes a kiss is just a kiss, nothing more.”

Well, this was something you never knew about Jae -- though it wasn’t surprising considering the two of you had never discussed kissing before.

You stared at him for a few moments more, and then... before you lost your nerve... you went for it.

You leaned in and swiftly captured his lips, moving your hands to cradle his face.

At first, you thought you didn’t really feel anything. Your lips were on his, gently pulling and sucking on them, but... that was it. But then you felt his arms slide around your waist. He pulled you just a little bit closer. He clutched at the back of your shirt. He delicately caressed the small of your back with his thumb.

And your heart and stomach and lungs and basically everything in your body went wild. There was fluttering and somersaulting and leaping. You couldn’t tell if your heart was up in your throat or down in your stomach. You couldn’t tell if there were a billion small butterflies flying around in there or if it was just one giant dragon. You couldn’t tell if you wanted him to stop immediately or keep kissing you forever.

...Okay, that was a total lie. You definitely wanted him to keep kissing you forever.

And that thought, ironically enough, made you pull away. You searched his face as you continued to cradle it in your palms, trying to both catch your breath and think of something to say.

Luckily, Jae beat you to it.

“...Did it feel as nice as in your dream?” he murmured.

You nodded.

“So... what do you wanna do?”

That was a very good question.

What did you want to do?

Slowly, you let your hands fall from his face, but your eyes never left his for even a millisecond. It was like you were hoping the answer to that question was somewhere in his eyes, and if you just kept looking, eventually you would find it.

But, of course, you didn’t. So, you simply responded with a question of your own.

“You really do... have feelings for me?”

A very attractive smirk tugged at one corner of Jae’s lips before he said, “Yeah. I do.”

“Like -- really and truly? Because the last thing I want is to eventually ruin our friendship --”

Jae interrupted you by ducking in and briefly pressing his lips to yours.

“Really and truly,” he whispered. “Trust me.”

And... for some reason, that was all you needed to hear. Trust me. Because you did trust him. You knew you could because he had always been there for you. He had always been by your side whether or not you needed him to be.

So, you nodded. You tipped your chin in a very tiny nod, and when the loveliest smile spread across Jae’s mouth, you couldn’t stop yourself from indulging in yet another kiss.

Except a knock on his front door cut through the air before you had the chance to actually kiss him, and Jae sprung off the couch to go answer it.

You knew it had to be the chicken delivery, so you called out after him. “Make sure they brought my potato wedges!”

“On penalty of death!” he replied just before he opened the door.

You bit your lip to keep from smiling, and a thought rushed into your mind -- the thought that your late night, can’t sleep phone conversations would probably be pretty different from now on.

I mean... you would probably still talk about robot clones and dinosaurs and the Mandela Effect and soulmates and all that. You would still tell each other everything. You would still listen to each other and be there for each other.

So... never mind. Your conversations wouldn’t be all that different. Just everything else would.