#jack blogs.

(stolen from @eldunea​​)

What’s the kindest thing you almost did? 

❝ ALMOST ? I—— ❞ Well that was hard. Good Jack had done good things, he’d scarified himself, scarified his goodness, surely that part of him would be a good draw for acts of kindness. But Good Jack, like himself, was motivated. He wouldn’t have stopped at almost. So it was up to Jack to ponder his own actions, ❝ I dunno. I’m not really the POSTER CHILD for impulse control. If I WANTED to be nice I’d do it. ❞ Questions that asked him to recall his own actions was hard anyway. He wasn’t sure why. (It’s the ADHD). 

Is your fear of insomnia stronger than your fear of what awoke you? 

❝ Absolutely not. ❞

Are bonsai cruel? 

❝ No ? Why would it be CRUEL ? It’s just a plant. ❞ Not that he didn’t love his plants, ❝ They don’t have FEELINGS you know. ❞ Well, they might, ❝ The fact they have someone hand watering, trimming and CARING for them is probably the best they could ASK for, if they could ask for it. It’s like asking if owning a DOG is cruel—— it’s domesticated, it wouldn’t EXIST without humans and it wouldn’t survive without them either. ❞

Do you love what you love, or just the feeling?

❝ Is there a difference ? I love what I do, it makes me feel good, and even if it makes me feel BAD sometimes, I still like doing it. So I guess I love it MORE than the feeling——— But it’s the same thing as friends you know. Do you REALLY like your friends ? Or are you just a social creature who will get LONELY so you look for opportune connections which satisfies your NEEDS and costs you the LEAST amount of mental resources ? Hm ? Well, it’s STUPID to ask, that’s what it is. ❞

Your earliest memories: do you look through your young eyes, or look at your young self?

❝ I guess I, see myself. Huh, that’s pretty weird... We kind of feel like DIFFERENT people honestly. I was pretty naive back then. ❞

Which feels worse: to know that there are people who do more with less talent, or that there are people with more talent? 

❝ You know what feels WORSE ? People with more talent who do LESS. It’s pathetic and it DISGUSTS me. But yeah I think undeserved credit SUCKS, people who have talent are admirable, people who LUCK their way into success are as worthless as their endeavors. ❞

Do you walk on moving walkways? 

❝ OBVIOUSLY, I have places to be. ❞

Should it make any difference that you knew it was wrong as you were doing it? 

❝ No. Because people will CONVINCE themselves they were doing it for the right reasons. Instead of OWNING up to it. Somethings are evil, that doesn’t mean they’re not NECESSARY. Morality isn’t very scientific you know. We make EXCUSES to hurt others for the greater good all the time, but our ACTIONS are more than our CHOICES. Actions will ripple through the world, CAUSE and effect, one thing may HELP one person but hurt another, you may never even KNOW it. Which is, ugh, way too much to THINK about honestly. So no, not it DOESN’T matter. No matter what you do, you can’t PREDICT how it will change over TIME and distance. ❞

Would you trade actual intelligence for the perception of being smarter? 

❝ NO, absolutely not. ❞

Why does it bother you when someone at the next table is having a conversation on a cell phone? 

❝ Eugh, YES, god. That’s why I wear HEADPHONES when I go out, I can’t be forced to listen to every IDIOTS toxic relationship drama. ❞

How many years of your life would you trade for the greatest month of your life? 

❝ None. I’ll make my own greatest month thanks. ❞

What would you tell your father, if it were possible?

❝ .......... I dunno. We don’t really connect anymore. I wish he’d stop taking Lauras’ MELODRAMA so seriously. I wish he could have been AROUND more when things were... ❞ No, it wouldn’t have made any difference, ❝ I dunno. Wish he could get Laura off my BACK ! I just want him on my side you know ? Spicers need to stick together. ❞

Which is changing faster, your body or your mind? 

❝ Ugh, I can’t TELL honestly. I’m kind of getting a tan and it’s WEIRD cause now I have to use way more concealer and I went through like, MONKEY PUBERTY— I’ve never been so fucking... CONFUSED in my life though. I didn’t use to question myself so much. ❞

Is it cruel to tell an old person his prognosis? 

❝ No ? People need to KNOW. ❞

Are you in any way angry at your phone?

❝ Why ? Would I be ? ❞

When you pass a storefront, do you look at what’s inside, look at your reflection, or neither? 

❝ I mean if the surface is particularly reflective, MYSELF. I’m not usually interested in random stores anyway. ❞

Is there anything you would die for if no one could ever know you died for it? 

❝ I rather not DIE. But if I could shake up the world a bit, I guess I’d be happy to die for a LEGACY.❞

If you could be assured that money wouldn’t make you any small bit happier, would you still want more money? 

❝ Yes ? Look, the idea that money can’t by happiness is fundamentally WRONG in a capitalist society. Money buys you out of literally all your problems, buys you EVERYTHING you want and people are inherently attracted to people with wealth. I mean, they’re MOOCHERS, and it’s probably worse off for you in terms of finding real friends, but at least you’re not in crippling DEBT or poor. ❞

What has been irrevocably spoiled for you? 

❝ Can I say Chase Young ? Cause he SUCKS now. ❞

If your deepest secret became public, would you be forgiven? 

❝ Ha, why would ANYONE ever forgive JACK SPICER for anything ? They’d hate me MORE and have fun doing it. ❞

Is there anything you feel a need to confess? 

❝ Eh, not really. I’m pretty straight forward if I WANT people to know something. ❞

You know it’s a “murder of crows” and a “wake of buzzards” but it’s a what of ravens, again?

❝ An unkindness, it’s literally TWO questions down, but I knew that. ❞

What is it about death that you’re afraid of? 

❝ I.... can’t... stop it ? I can’t PREDICT it. I don’t know if I’ll be able to... finish everything I NEED to... or if I’ll miss something when I’m GONE... I know nobodies going to miss me, not REALLY... But I still want to make some kind of IMPACT before I die and ugh, I really rather NOT. Feasible immortality is on the top of my list of NECESSARY discoveries. If the monks and CHASE and Wuya can do it, I can do it TOO. Maybe I’ll pour my brain into a computer. ❞

How does it make you feel to know that it’s an “unkindness of ravens”?

    ‘ Cute. ‘ Noooo.... He’s hardcooree....

kimiko, a full foot shorter:screams