Just somethin' for whoever.
I don’t want to party every night with people who don’t give a shit about how you sleep at night. I don’t want 100 “close” friends to call my squad when 99 of them would bail at the sign of trouble. I don’t want to sleep with every man I find attractive, instead I’d rather make love on the night of my wedding with the man I married earlier who would give his life for me and agree on getting 11 kittens annually. I want a quiet and peaceful life drowned in nothing but God and Him alone. I want people who want that too. If I have to do it alone then so be that, but I think it’s important that people look for a second at everything they can lose as quick as the amount of time it took for them to look. I’m not perfect and I never will be, period. I’m flawed as ever and I make the same mistakes over and over and over again. I’m a creation designed for error. I’m nothing but a molecule in this vast universe of ours how ever small it may seem at times and even larger when we’re sad. There are about a dozen things I’ll never admit out loud and here’s one of them, not quite out loud, but as loud as it comes in writing. I’m not as strong I seem and even weaker than I look. I need the people I have in my life right now more than they need me, it may seem the opposite. I hide things way too well for someone who can practically be read like a diner menu. I’m that girl who will never get over her first love because it meant too much and lasted too little. He’ll never read this, but at the small chance he does, let me tell you this, you were my world and I trusted you with the life I breathe. You were the man of my dreams and we ended up lovers that went wrong. I should be asleep.
