#it's sam

The Best - I'm Actually Offended That He Lasted So Long??? HELLO???

Kyojuro Rengoku - Lasts Entire Month.

Hear me out here. Kyojuro and I fuck as if fucking is going out of style, and we're trying to bring it back. BUT! I know the man has impenetrable self-control; he's a Hashira, after all! Aside from that, we sometimes go an extended amount of time away from one another because of missions, so we're not strangers to periods of celibacy. I imagine he makes himself busy with training, reading, and eating copious amounts of food. But baaaaaaaaby...when December 1st hits? The man is coming to collect what is OWED to him.

The Worst - Automatic Fail And Not Sorry About It

Shoei Barou - Doesn't Last a Single Day But Wasn't Attempting to.

Literally just wrote this small little thing about how he handles NNN. For Shoei, he doesn't like being told what to do, and the idea that I'm dictating when he can and can't get his dick wet because of some "made-up fucking internet tradition" (he said worse but I'm trying to keep it cute) makes a vein visibly pulse in his forehead. He laughs in my face and tells me to open wide and unlatch my fucking jaw for his cock before he unlatches it for me. Yes, sir. Anything for you, sir.

Aoi Todo - Fail. Fail. Fail. But with a twist. Lasts 10 days.

Todo is fucking cool..like my man is HIP, so he knows about weird internet sub-culture. He whoops and hollers when I bring up NNN. He doesn't think I'LL last but agrees to participate because it'll be fun to break me (what the fuck, Aoi..?). And break me, he does. Todo is the one sending shirtless selfies, Sam. He's the one I walk in on wearing nothing but an apron as he cooks, and as he turns around, he greets me with a prominent bulge but acts as though everything is normal and he's not about to poke my eye out. Something has got to give, and it's 100% me. I'm jumping his bones, begging for him to fucking touch me, which he gladly does. Afterward, he made fun of me for giving in so easily.

Dishonorable Mention - Cheater, Cheater, Pumpkin Eater!

Kafka Hibino - Fail But Won't Disclose When. Womp Womp.