#irlsick

clip of my smoothie video :* message me for the full video!

We had just spent the evening driving around our little town looking at Christmas lights and were back at my apartment having some passionate debate about a silly topic (I think birdwatching?) when I started to feel faint. I have had cardiac issues since I was a kid and fainting spells have been a part of my life since then, but I actually did not see this particular faint coming. I was feeling perfectly fine when all of a sudden I felt my heart rate skyrocket out of nowhere and my vision get blurry. I clutched at my chest in response, which made him immediately pause the conversation and ask if I was okay. I do not remember what I said in response as I was gently picked up and lowered to the ground by him, which was very proactive and I applaud him for recognizing the signs that Ro needs to Be On The Floor Right Now Pleaseandthankyou. I was still awake at this point but my heart rate was high and I was having trouble keeping my eyes open. I heard him say, “I’m gonna grab some water real quick.” Now, whenever someone had gotten water while I’ve been having a fainting spell, the water has always been for me. So when I heard him grab a glass for my cupboard, fill it with water, and then chug it in 3 seconds flat, I burst out laughing. Obviously he was probably feeling nervous and needed to regulate so he could be helpful through the rest of my medical episode, but good god that was fucking hilarious. And then he grabbed another glass and filled it with water for me😂 After that, he knelt down beside my head, and that is when I passed fully out for a few seconds. I woke up on my right side with one hand on my shoulder and his other hand cupping my forehead. The “coming to” moment is always really uncomfortable for me and I think I moaned out loud in pain because I heard him say, “I know, it’s okay, you’re alright.” When I was alert and talking again he carried me to the couch and very gently set me down, and I laid my head in his lap and waited for my brain to reboot. I told him afterwards that he handled it very well, especially since we had never had the “what to do if Ro passes out” conversation. He’s known about my illness since I first got sick as a kid, so I assumed that he had been around me during a faint at least once before. I was really surprised when he told me that he had never witnessed any kind of medical episode of mine before, because he handled it like he knew what he was doing. It’s also bonkers to me the amount of time we spent together as kids that somehow never overlapped with the amount of time little Ro spent wiped out on the floor (it took awhile to get diagnosed and an even longer time to find a cardiologist who knew what they were doing, and at that point I had been fainting left and right for almost half a decade). Somehow, over all these years we’ve know each other, C did not witness a Ro faint with his own two eyes until our mid-twenties. Even then, he was probably the calmest about it as anyone can be. I adore him 🥺