#iris.txt

I share this because I've never really seen anyone with a similar gender journey to mine. Everyone mostly clocks me as a trans girl, male to female. But I want to say that there are people out here with complex and interesting gender stories out here. Ones you can't accurately assume on first glance. I'm wondering if there's anyone on here with a story that sounds anything like this.

These 2 are 100% Toxic Yuri. No one can change my mind.

Cordelia yearns for attention, and because Karlheinz is unable to feel anything towards anyone, Cordelia is stuck craving and wanting. Especially since Karlheinz doesn’t care for Cordelia, seeing her as a failed experiment and a means to an end.

Cue Beatrix.

Someone who can GIVE Cordelia the reactions and attention she wants, while still revelling in the same stoic, cold, nonchalant appeal that Karlheinz brings.

—All in the twisted comfort and solace in Beatrix.

And that somewhat tears Cordelia inside knowing that she must seek it out from Beatrix—her rival.

In a way, she finds herself loathing how Karlheinz sees her as disposable despite seeing Karlheinz as her drug, her innate need to be seen as a true woman or a true person in her own right. As in a way, she’s forfeited everything to him; her life, her soul, her.

So it’s quite scary to see herself so comfortable in the soothing—yet gentle—arms of Beatrix. So much that she starts to crave it. …And perhaps like it.

100% toxic since Cordelia—in her twisted senses—attributes these new found “acts of service,” albeit gentler than she’s used to, as something foreign yet needy. Needy in the way that she’s never thought she could be needed or valued in such a way.

It goes against her values, especially since Cordelia believes Beatrix is under her mercy, her whims. Only for Cordelia to realize the innermost parts of her has forfeited parts of her (shockingly unclaimed?!) heart to Beatrix—despite it being for Karlheinz.

Or so she thought.

It’s toxic in Cordelia’s possessiveness towards her inability to share Beatrix’s attention, border-lining her urges to ruin Beatrix in every way she can. Ripping and gnawing at skin, scratches—red streaky lines—coursing broadened backs, and stealing selfish bruising kisses, where sharpened fangs tear gums and burst lips like hot searing geysers.

Whereas Beatrix realizes she’s one of the only people who can “handle” or “deal” with Cordelia, in any way she sees fit. The sole person who can fully understand Cordelia’s insecurities and amateurish ways in which she displays it. Amateurish. That’s Cordelia. In comparison to Beatrix, that is, in terms of relationships and “playing house.”

But Beatrix is toxic, too. For every “model” housewife holds secrets unlike any other. She knows how to carefully manipulate Cordelia’s needs. The way in which she keeps Cordelia coming back when she’s in one of her “depressive” moods. Where she finds her self-worth attributed to whatever selfish desires she can enact and take—take, take, TAKE—from another. Never give. Always take.

And Beatrix? Always willing to give—for the right price, that is.

Sojourner: -lets out a deep sigh- You are sooo lucky its my favorite colors… -he grumbles- this is so dumb…

Spectre: I think you look rather nice son… -Pats his shoulder supportively-

Iris: Yeah! You look super cute!~ :3c 

Sojourner: -sighs and grumbles- Thanks… 

A lot of laws are based on the idea of singular, human personhood. A lot of rights are based on the idea of singular, human personhood. A lot of laws and rights that protect folks and say that others aren't allowed to treat them like shit are based on the idea of singular, human personhood. Therefore, you have to be careful who you reveal your alterhuman identity to, particularly if you reject humanity, personhood, or being a single person in a single body – not just to avoid expected discrimination, but to avoid legal discrimination and losing your rights due to the argument that you are not someone those laws and rights apply to. For this same reason, it's also important that you accept that there will be times where you have to lie about your identity, especially when it comes to authority figures who hold power over you (for example, cops. Cops already don't have a great track record for following the law or facing consequences for their cruelty; you don't want to clue them in that they might be able to get away with their cruelty yet again because they may be able to argue that those laws don't even apply to you in the first place). If you have to lie about being a singular, human person to protect yourself, do it. Or if you have trouble with lying, then consider it as a legal identity and not a personal one; you can identify in this way for legal reasons. I am a singular, human person for legal reasons, but I may also, on the side, have a much more complex identity.