#intp issues

1. Socially awkward - Yes

2. Thinks they're smart - Yep, kinda

3. Appears to be aloof but is actually just a dork - I suppose so

4. Doesn't really like physical affection - Okay, I love physical affection. Like, a lot. I'm reeeeally physically affectionate with my mom, and I hug my friends a lot... But sometimes (for example, a friend just leans on me with their whole body) I'll feel quite uncomfortable, probably because I'm not used to the feeling.

5. Doesn't like sports - Mostly, but basketball is fun (UPDATE: I like sports more. I used to really hate P.E. and stuff, but now I've realized sports are a great way to de-stress and dodgeball is actually fun when you dare to throw balls!)

6. Likes playing games and coding - Yes

7. Is often late - Yes, sometimes

8. Forgetful - Very.

9. Lazy - Yep

10. Types in full sentences with flawless grammar - This used to be me, but not anymore

@intp-again

WARNING: This may come out as jumbled thoughts. I hope I make sense.

People-pleasing is a physical way to express care for those around us. 

I think that because we (INTP’s collectively) tend to have issues with expressing our emotions (especially verbally) we use to the physicality of people-pleasing to show care for people in a way we KNOW other people will recognize.

I also kinda went Google adventure crazy and I found this in relation to your second question...

“INTP’s will naturally value their top three functions a great deal...  As a result, INTP’s can see their inferior Extraverted Feeling as intrusive, meddling, people-pleasing and desperate to be liked.” (source)

So essentially, yes, Fe “gets in the way”, but seeing it as a positive or a negative is up to you as an individual. 

I know you’ll probably find repulsive (at some level) to curtail your words or actions to what is useful, or to have to take sides, but what is useful and which side are you (or other people) perceived to be on is part of the Truth you want to investigate, and what’s more, it’s objective. It is what it is and it doesn’t change according to your mental categories.

Ten years ago, I got angry with people who said things like “I don’t like reading because I like being active” (stupid!)  or “I don’t like fantasy because it’s unrealistic” (banal! tautological!) or “I like combining tradition and modernity” (contradictory!). At some level, I “didn’t understand” what they were trying to communicate and worked myself into a state of thinking their words were gibberish. Which I think didn’t contribute to my (oh so vaste) popularity.

These days, there’s still a part of me that thinks people blabber; I guess it shows on this blog too. I still get annoyed. However 1) it rarely escalates to full-blown rage; 2) I’m aware that, while the logical flaws may be present, I might be ignoring the context or subtext and focusing on the “skeleton” of what is being said because I don’t like the real message.

I love reading (and I have a wacko temper) so I might be annoyed by people declaring they hate it and notice they’re focusing on the stupid criticism “reading is not active”; the truth, though, is they mean phisically active, and if you absolutely require physically stimulating hobbies then maybe reading is not suited to your personality.

I love fantasy, so I focus on the tautology “fantasy is unrealistic”; the subtext though is “I prefer realistic settings and I’m bored by outlandish or mythological themes”.

If you “combine tradition and modernity” you’re arguably already violating tradition; I’m focusing on the contradiction. The real message, though, is “I like some novelty, but I prefer gradual change and I’ll never discard some old stuff”. Which is what most humans do anyway; but I prefer to ignore it because I’m attached to the idea of change/progress and see traditionalism as wrong.

Being in an environment where they feel controlled by others.

Not being allowed to go with the flow of the moment.

Being required to do simple and repetitive tasks.

Being surrounded by individuals they see as incompetent.

A lack of autonomy.

Being in charge of the quality of another person’s work.

Not enough alone time. Too much extraverting.

Being immersed in emotionally charged environments.

Being in a place where their expertise is not appreciated.

People “barging in” on their space.

Not having their strongly held values validated.