#insignificant

i never got better and i highkey gotta die bro i cannot keep pretending im okay with any of this 😂 and the worst part is that if you asked me to pin point the issue i genuinely fucking couldnt because its been building up for months . years maybe

i need a man but also i might kill myself if i get one again fuuuck why is it so hard to find a man like arthur morgan…. or harold gainsworth… or groundskeeper… this is so bullshit… i want a man with meat on his bones and slightly taller than me and all the traits of a man who WOULD be an asshole to me but in reality he’s actually very sweet and he’s obsessed with me and its always all about mememe and he loves me so much that he doesnt care that its all about me and infact he LIKES it that way and he takes care of me and he’s a super stable man so whenever im losing my shit he fixes it for me but hes also like sort of guarded and has a deep traumatic past and one day i finally get him to open up because hes So in love with me and he feels So vulnerable and safe with me and i let him be soft with me and its only us foorrreeverr… and we have no kids so the excitement never goes away with us… hes super tolerant but also puts up sort of Hard boundaries so he gets mad at me sometimes and then i get really sad and then he holds me for an hour to make me feel better but also kicker is that if he pisses me off too much i get distant and i also need him to be okay with that. And . When i come back he has to come back too. And he needs to be Older. I cant wait to be 18 so i can finally date olderrrrr oohhhmymyy goddd a 28 year old country man would fix me i think