Flame
Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x Reader
Summary: Sometimes you just need an inner advisor.
Warnings: Angst/Comfort, soft!Loki, insecurities, hurt, self deprecation implied, fire, no use of y/n
A/N: Hi Loves! This is heavily inspired by my own personal inner advisor which was created in my EMDR therapy session and was envisioned as Loki who told me to burn everything :), I hope you all enjoy this, it was heavily self indulgent but I hope it helps other people too! Enjoy <3
A chill crept up your spine, settling into your bones as you settled into the cool empty sheets which line your bed. Your eyes close as your bottom lip trembled, trying to push back the tsunami waves of emotions that threaten to spill. It had been a week of pure hell and tonight was your tipping point. The way you had heard the whispers of people as you passed, each one coming from a poisonous tongue. The glances and whispers held high distaste and made your mouth and mind sour.
It plagued you for the day, no matter the task, no matter the smallest minute detail, you would see it imperfect, full of flaws and how helpless you were. It turned your day around, changing your hopes and expectations for the day to something rotten.
You were unsure when you had stopped weeping and had fallen into the blissfulness of sleep. Hadn’t realized you was asleep as she still felt the wet streams that stained your flesh and still felt the coolness of your sheets beneath you.
“What is troubling you, my darling?”
It stirred you, your heart spiking at the intrusive presence invading you. As you sprang up, hands holding up your weight as you sat up right. You weren’t sure what had startled you more, the new presence stood in front of you or the liquid held by a void that surrounded your body.
“No need to be frightened, I am not here to cause you harm. Quite the opposite in fact.” He had assured you, dropping down in a squatting position.
You stared at him, eyes wide and unmoving. Your mind was racing before it settled. Dream. You’re dreaming, clearly you must be asleep and this is nothing other than your brain creating this image in front of you. How else could you explain him?
“Loki?” It was the only word you were capable of speaking.
He only replied with a smile, one much softer than you see depicted in the movies. Often they would paint him as a villain, someone who wishes fit the hero’s downfall. You could see a little bit of yourself in him, in his insecurities, in his behavior, maybe that’s why he’s appearing to you now.
“Indeed.” He confirmed, extending his hand out for you, which you take.
“What’s going on? Why are you in my dream? Why is it so cold?” You question, noticing the steam your warm breath created.
“A curious thing,” he chuckles, lifting you to your feet. “You may think of this as your soul, yes? And I, as your inner advisor.”
“My inner… what?”
“Inner advisor. I am able to make your unconscious mind accessible to you. Guide you to support, resolutions, whatever you may seem to desire.” His voice spoke softly as his thumb brushed over your knuckles.
You closed your eyes again, taking a deep breath and inhaling the scent of oak and sandalwood, something you had only imagine might stick to his forest green Asgardian leather.
“Okay, sure. But why is it so cold?”
“You’re flame has been extinguished. You’re sense of self, corrupted.” He explains, smile etched to his features as he squeezed your hand in his.
“I’ve come to repair your flame, my darling. Slowly. But I will to my best to nurture and guide you so that it may become a blaze.”
With a flick of his hand a spark emerged within your palm that held his. His and holding the back of ours so that both your palms had been raised as the fire began. There was no pain, no numbness, just a tingle that started in your palm and ended in the nerves of your fingertips.
“It will take time to develop, but I shall be here every step, beside you shall you have a need for my guidance.” He explains, his eyes falling to the small flame.
“Thank you, Loki.” You whisper, turning your gaze to him.
He shook his head, his free hand raising in a stop gesture. His eyes held a sense of pure, genuine, affection. The flame grew slightly just by the feeling of his emotion seeping into the pores of your skin.
“There is no need to thank me. You are the person capable of improvement, I am merely here to help you if you falter.” He explained, his hand lowering to support your hand holding the flame.
“You, my dear, are stronger than you may believe. Bravery that would rival that of any warrior. You are plenty worthy to keep this blaze aflame. Worthy to wield Mjölnir. And most importantly, you are loved. Even when battling you’re darkest enemy, you will remain loved, even if just by me.”
You felt you’re eyes burn, not willing to try and stop the tears that flood your eyes and fall down your face. Your freehand coming up to cover your mouth as you sobbed. The feeling of Loki’s lips pressing against your forehead only made you sob harder.
“I plead with you, no more tears need to be shed.” He softly cooed, lifting a hand to thumb away the tears that fell.
“I will be here when you return again.” He swore, placing a purger kiss to your temple.
As his body began to dissipate into the darkness, you held into his hand almost as if pleading with him to not leave you alone again.
“And Darling? Burn everything.”
The words rang in your head as you’re eyes shot open, jolting up from your lying position. You’re eyes take in you’re empty room as the only light came from the sun as it streams in through your window. You’re eyes slowly cast down to your palm, feeling you’re heart clench before clutching your palm to your chest.
“Thank you, Loki.”
