So, I promised a long ask to wrap up my thoughts on the first 11 chapters of Let the Light in. And I'm going to, first and foremost apologize for this essay of an ask, but I do feel like this story deserves every word of praise I gave it and more. So, I’m going to try and condense this into something more manageable.
1 – Anika. You did wonders for her character, and I wish I mentioned her more in my comments, because you single-handedly made me love her. From how supportive she is, to how she treats Reader, to the way she constantly tried to get Reader to socialize and more importantly figure things out with Tara, Anika is easily the best supporting character of the story.
2 – Reader’s family. I love how much I hate them. The sperm donor gets the most hate, but hell no, they are all to blame for Reader’s emotional state and coping mechanisms, they are either directly responsible, or they stood by and watched. The only one who can be somewhat redeemed in my eyes is the younger brother because he might just be too young, and Reader has been absent from his life, from what I can tell for several years now. But other than him, they either caused harm, or stood by and let it happen. There’s also the uncle plotline and I am looking forward to the reveal.
3 – Side characters. You have an incredible talent to make your side characters stand out, from Charlotte to Olivia and finally Maya in chapter 10, even when they only get a handful of scenes they are all incredibly well crafted.
I have never seen such a well crafted Tara x Reader relationship, one that slowly builds them up, not even from nothing, but from way less, from what appears to be enemies that can’t stand one another and are constantly trying to make thing difficult for each other, to lovers who are overthinking their every more and then finally letting go.
Tara took Reader on a wild roller coaster ride, from acting like she hated Reader, to slowly but surely coming to terms with her feelings, to the point of kissing Chad because she thought he was Reader. And then the hot and cold game over the couple of chapters, 5 and 6 in particular where I would have lost my mind if I were Reader because she was switching between feelings and opinions in an instant, not that I’m complaining, it was absolutely perfect.
And then there’s Reader, and there are only a handful of authors I can think of who can pull what you pulled with Reader. The complexity, the charm, the backstory, I love everything about Reader, even her not so good tendencies. I’ll have a lot more to say about her the story concludes, for now, this will be enough.
And the two of them together? Every scene is incredible, I could read about them for weeks and not once get bored.
And finally, I really need to know, does Tara even remember what she told Reader when she was drunk and called Reader to her apartment, back in chapter 6?
FIRST of all, never ever ever ever everrr apologize for long messages - including comments!! Secondly, I totally geeked out when I saw your comment in my activity center. This message is just the cherry on top. Your comment are always so thought out and I'm obsessed with long comments that analyze every aspect of the post it's under.
Side/Supporting Characters: Thank you!!!!!! I try my best to focus on/develop every dynamic. Including unsuspecting ones - which you'll see in future chapters. Anika, in my head, was a big step for Reader. Reader only really ever had one constant companion in her life - Harry. As stated throughout the story, she's not really one to put herself out there. But then comes college. What is she gonna do, rent an apartment on her own? In Manhattan? In this economy? And I knew from the start that I wanted Anika to be the voice of reason between Tara and Reader. They're living together, it makes sense that she'd see just how much Reader's affected and get fed up with how easily all the drama could've been avoided. Anika's work is not done yet! But for now, she could use the break. As for the side characters, making ocs will always be a lot of fun! I knew I wanted Reader to have an ex, but I also knew I didn't want it to be any of the current canon characters. A little background on Reader's relationship with Olivia: While Reader was crushing on Tara, Olivia was going through a rough break-up. They'd connected the summer after Sophomore year, talked, and ended up "dating." I put quotes because it wasn't official at first, Reader and Olivia just wanted to pass the time with someone they tolerated while trying to get over someone who would never love them back (to their knowledge). But, they grew close, and decided, "Hey, we like each other. We have chemistry. Why not?" Okay, it was a little more than that, or less? They were teenagers looking to pass the time with each other but ended finding something more. That's what makes their break-up so bittersweet. Because in the end, the other was more than a distraction, she was a lesson. They knew they weren't gonna last, but how they ended is what hurt the most.
Reader's Family: Oh, boy. You don't know the HALF of it. Here's the thing, it is so complicated. That's the best word in this situation. Her eldest brother (you'll learn more about later) has always done his own thing. He got away. He escaped the crazy family he was too unfortunate to be born in. But where does that leave Reader? Oliver has this whole life completely separate from her without even realizing. Have you ever watched Six Feet Under? They're kind of like Nate and David. And if you haven't watched it, totally watch it. It's an amazing show, and I'd give anything to watch it for the first time again. Anyways. Now the youngest brother. Their father has always seen himself in him - as implied/mentioned in chapter four. Reader can't help but resent that fact while also pitying her brother. To have a man like that project his image onto you? It's twisted. In addition, Stephen doesn't remember all the bad shit their father used to pull. He was either too young or unborn. But Oliver and Reader remember it. All too well. It wasn't until Stephen was that their father made changes. He was still a shitty father, but Reader recognized the changes. Subtle, but there. She often asked herself, "why didn't he change for me?" It wasn't until after she learned the truth that she realized why her father looked at her like she a monster. A sociopath. You may be wondering, "but aren't her brothers also related?" "Where's her mom in all this?" Well, that's question for later!
Now, Tara and Reader!!!!!:
I knew from day one that I didn't want them to move too fast. That's probably my biggest fear whenever I work on Let the Light In, that and making character ooc. But by the end of chapter six, I realized something. They're young. They're stupid. They are going to fuck a few things up due to impulse. "It's only human natural!" - Kevin Malone. Especially given both their paths, which I plan on touching a lot more in the future. Remember what you pointed during your chapter nine reading:
"Oh, I get it, I really do, but I want them to kiss so badly. I want them to finally be completely honest, and yet I know Reader isn’t in the right headspace, that she’s too deep in self-deprecation to do this right. And I know Tara can help her get through it but I also feel like Reader healing shouldn’t be reliant of Tara, because that’s not the healthiest way to approach the issue."
You summed it up perfectly!! Her talk with Olivia was a bitter reminder as to what her miscommunication always resulted in. She battling between getting better and the natural instinct to pull back, and Reader's not the only one. I'll reveal this now, I put subtle details throughout chapter seven, but Tara started going to therapy after chapter six. She DID remember. Sure, she may have forgotten a thing or two, but she remembered enough to the point where she cried the next morning (I may do a flashback/throwback to this in the future). I showed this new milestone through Tara's appetite. She went from forgetting to eat to having the diet of a twelve year old boy. Not to mention she's not afraid any more! She like-likes Reader and she's gonna do something about it! She was so closed off the first few therapy sessions but now?? She's having revelation after revelation. From realizing she's crushing on Reader to realizing her feelings date back to Senior year (if not further).
Oh and "what appears to be enemies that can’t stand one another and are constantly trying to make things difficult for each other, to lovers who are overthinking their every more and then finally letting go" is the PERFECT way to sum these fckers up. The shit these two have been through is, uh, something, to say the least. Truly a rollercoaster.
AND THANK YOUUUU!!!!! For all the feedback, I love seeing that you commented on my posts!! It brightens my day every time, especially when you point out little details and parallels. I can tell that you're genuinely enjoying the story. I try my best when it comes to developing my characters, including y/n, so to know that you think so highly is an amazing feeling. I appreciate every single one of your comments and messages. And never hesitate to send long asks/comments, I love reading them - more than once!!!!!
