Catching people can be difficult...

Resewn Identity 🪡🫂 / Rose Tinted Glasses 🌹🕶️

A fujin, a fudanshi and a person trying to understand their friends are put in a room with nothing but a pencil and paper...

The day before the party, there was a conversation that we had that stuck out to me.

We had taken a break from searching the island, our bodies tired and hot from the sun that burned through our clothes and onto our skin.

You and I had sat under a tree. I had just confessed to you about the scar underneath my bandage. I had just been able to process your maturity the moment we had as we finished the fruit and coconut juice we shared. You let me lean onto you despite the fact we were both sweating...

I don't know why the thought had occurred to me, but I was in sudden shock as I remembered how similar your selflessness and nobility was... At the memory of my late father, I couldn't bear the thought that there was something wrong just as there had been with him. Back when I couldn't understand the tired look in his eyes, which now matched yours.

It reminded me that noble people suffer silently...

I spoke with a heavy heart;

"Captain... I fear that you will keep your promise to us to your detriment." I hadn't realized that I had begun to cry.

You paused before speaking, clearly wanting to answer quickly to soothe my worries. It was how you always answered my questions, now that I think about it.

"Kurosawa, don't worry for my sake." You replied, your voice forcefully turned flat. "My responsibility lies in my capability to protect everyone. Yours lies in your capability to assist me. Do not let fear into your heart, that's what Monokuma wants for us all to allow."

I couldn't help but feel that you were trying to ignore the topic.

"I will make sure we all get off this island, safe and sound. That's what a leader is for. I, Byakuya Togami, will not fall either. This isn't the worst situation I've been in, Kurosawa. A strong group cannot be led by a weak leader, after all."

Your posture raised as you spoke, a strong and confident aura radiating from you as you chided.

I know you always wiped away my worries with your arrogant, overbearing confidence... And I had always let you. It was a taste of your ability, and I blissfully fell for it each time. It was like music to my ears, these beautiful lies...

But I couldn't listen that time, my worries had grown too large for me to ignore unlike the previous times. I suppose I felt comfortable and vulnerable. I just wish you could have trusted me as well.

I had started to slip off of your arm. Your words could not comfort me. I felt my heart run fast, my sight of the beach turning into a blur. As I clutched onto Gii-chan, trying to ground myself, I forced my body to stay close to you. You paused again at the sudden action. Forgive me for my clinginess that day, I know you valued your space.

I know you were probably annoyed with my behavior that day, but knowing what happened to you makes me wish I had stuck my ground that day.

By the time I could hear you again, you were still trying to reassure me that everything would be fine. It was unlike me to not pay attention, so I don't blame you for being surprised.

My sobs had likely grown louder, I remember squeezing Gii-chan with all my might. Memories of my father had started to flood my mind and I lost control of myself.

Your voice lulled me out of the despair I felt, but you had lightly scolded me. I know you weren't ignoring my tears, but you couldn't coddle me either.

"Are you even paying attention, Kurosawa? This is unlike you, maybe the heat has started to get to you..."

Looking back on it now, I realize you likely didn't want to show any signs of vulnerability either. That was not a privilege you were blessed with, Mr. Togami... I feel ashamed I never could provide you with that feeling of safety that you had always provided to me and the other Ultimates. I took you for granted.

"Do you really not believe in my leadership abilities? Has nothing we've done meant a thing to you? What kind of assistant are you...?"

You asked me incredulously. You seemed offended by my lack of response.

Forgive me, Mr. Togami. My tears had been caused because I believed in you, not that I hadn't... I didn't want the cycle I feared to repeat once again. I feared the truth that laid in front of me that night you hosted the party.

"For the love of God..." You huffed, your wide chest growing with a heavy sigh.

Your large hand had risen up to the top of my head. It was warm, and the way you stroked my hair was gentle. You treated me as if I was something precious, someone worth the trouble to keep happy. I feel as if I was lucky. I haven't ever seen you show affection like this to anyone else. In a strange way, I feel honored I was the one you tried to keep happy.

I whined and tried to find my voice, yet all I could spit out was a slur of incomprehensible words that you somehow managed to understand.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it... Commoners like you are always sentimental under high stress. It simply can't be helped. Let it out, Ai- Kurosawa. There can't be much left liquid in that thick head of yours, can there? It's getting late."

You were mean for that, Mr. Togami. You just needed to divert my attention so I would stop crying.

It worked flawlessly. Like everything you did, I always found it to be utter perfection...

You gave me a few seconds to breathe and recoup. Your hand still traveled my head gently, careful not to pull or tug on my sensitive scalp.

I was ashamed of being so emotional in front of you. I couldn't bear to look at you. In that moment, I wondered if you would lose faith in my ability to serve you. A Captain cannot succeed with an unreliable crew.

"Breathe in... Now, breathe out."

I sniffled and took deep breaths as you instructed me to do. When and where did you learn these strategies...? For a business man, you're awfully aware of the science of human nature. I wonder if I had known you at all, Mr. Togami...

Your many blessings viewed by my eyes are unable to be captured again. Not unless I replay the memories I have of you, and I fear I'll forget the little things you've done for me. Even if I spent most of my free time with you, I still don't think it was enough.

I would do anything for the chance to talk to you one last time.

With one final breath, I finally broke the silence that grew between us as you had stopped instructing me.

"Forgive me, I don't mean to burden you with my insecurities... I don't wish to be a bother or get in your way, sir." I apologized, my voice strained and weak.

I finally looked up at you. Rather than a look of disappointment, as I had been expecting...

You wore a soft grin that I hadn't seen before. You were never hostile, but the edges of your personality could still be damaging to those who weren't careful.

"Rely on me, Kurosawa. Only I will provide you with the protection you seek. Don't be afraid of my presence, for I am here to guide you..."

By the time you stopped praising yourself to me, my eyes and mind had grown tired. Your hand continued to stroke my messy hair like a gentle breeze.

"By the time we leave this island, I promise you that you will grow much stronger and resilient. You will be as wonderful as your father once was, I assure you."

It wasn't the first promise you made to me that day. I was overwhelmed by your affection, but I secretly relished in the fact that you looked out for me each day. It started small with fruits and hearty food, things I know that you valued with your life. I wish that we had the opportunity to eat together again.

I want to make it past this killing game, but the idea of falling down with you tempts me each day as our classmates perish. This is a tiring existence, Captain... But if you value everyone's life, I will too. Even my own.

I closed my eyes and smiled, a soft sigh escaping me. You could read me like a book, your grin growing wider as I started to relax and nuzzle against your hand. A soft laugh escaped my lips, making you react kindly.

"There's my joyous assistant."

Your tone was filled with relief.

I let you feed me lies. I was eager to taste the sweetness of your words. There was no malice intended in your actions, we were both painfully aware of our situation. You knew you would die, and you wanted us to feel that we had a semblance of hope in this hell...

I can't thank you enough for your tender care, but I wish I could scream and yell at you for not believing in us as well... We both accepted your fate, and I may as well have been your killer.

Like putting on rose tinted glasses, I wish to wear the illusion of comfort again.

Byakuya, if there is an afterlife... Please wait for me. I don't intend on dying here. I can't. I won't let your sacrifice be for nothing. I'll do my best to act in your favor now that you're gone.

Your nobility and kindness has been a great relief to me. After losing my Papa, I felt a deep despair that I never thought would leave me. You made me feel safe for the first time in years and you proved to me that real strength comes from the goodness you give to others despite hardships. You gave me the hope I thought I lost the day my Papa died.

I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I hope you can forgive me someday. I would like nothing more than to apologize to you face to face.

You and my Papa's nobility both now blur together in a slurry of hope and despair... You were wonderful people who gave everything in your being to comfort the weak and empower the oppressed. Despite the despair I feel now that I've lost you both, I can't help but be thankful you existed.

Of course, I feel a great amount of guilt for both of your deaths. I still wish I had been the one to die in both of these cases.

Papa, forgive me for my selfishness... I was a needy, overbearing child who relied on you too much. I still am... I promise that I'll protect the people that you cared so much about. I'll become a reliable and mature attorney, just like you.

Byakuya, like I've said previously; forgive me for not taking action to protect you. You deserved kindness and respect, not just due to the fact that you were our leader, but because you're human too. You deserved to be treated like a human, flaws and insecurities accepted... You probably felt fear in your last moments, and I hope you didn't have to suffer long at all.

If you both could look after me as you had during your lives, I would appreciate it.

BEING AIKO’S MENTOR was something she didn’t really expect. when the charming girl was training, it was truly out of hyeju’s way to interrupt and ask abbout her form. it became almost natural to talk to her about her powers, and guiding her. but what happened next was she ended up playing the role of mentoring. and in essence, it reminded her of the days when her great grandmother would visit and show her how to work on her own weak powers. and just like her great grandmother, she was not going to give up on this girl. there was so much potential, and there was also so much sweetness that hyeju couldn’t let her leave. and when she heard the discouraging words of the sweet girl, she smiled. 

“ it’s okay. mastery of your skills take years, dear, ” she encouraged. standing by her side, she smiled, and copied her stance. “ you’d be surprised what you can do with bubbles. what seems like a weak power, ”  she started. one of aiko’s bubbles appeared nearby and she threw a blob of her acid into the bubble. it floated inside the bubble for a few moments. lifted in suspension, it kept the acid bubbling inside. but then it started to look as though it was being eaten away. bit by bit. gone, vanished, disappeared. the acid was swallowed by the bubble, leaving hyeju at a disadvantage. “ may actually be much greater than you thinks, ” she smiled, turning to the girl. “ we just need to find out what works for best for you. ”

bubbles, who would have thought that they would be her kryptonite? great granny did, but when she was younger, she always argued that something as powerful as acid wouldn’t be taken out by air and water. funny how right her great grandmother was.