oh oh oh oh. lewis turning up with his tooth gap and his big eyes and his curls and he grins at fernando who looks at him and knows. lewis who looks right back at him and knows too. and he’s a bit young. bit fresh and green around the edges but he feels sharper than he looks in the back of nando’s mind. like he has got teeth hidden under all that smile. he’s interesting is what i’m trying to say and fernando has always been a sucker for what he doesn’t understand. but he’s still a rookie and fernando is still a two time wdc and mclaren are looking up and this year should be a good year. nando has a good car. coming off a two year winning streak. AND a soulmate? pls. what more could he want.

and then lewis starts winning. and he doesn’t stop. and he’s fast. faster than fernando could have ever imagined. and he doesn’t play mind games. (what kind of soulmate of fernando alonso’s doesn’t play mind games. somewhere michael is laughing.) he’s stubborn and silent and vicious and he smiles throughout all of 2007. leaning back in his chair and winking. and fernando hates him. (fernando loves him.)

(you are what i need. he doesn’t think. you aren’t what i want. but you are what i need. and he locks the thought away.)

(he never asks lewis what he wants. what he needs. sometimes he wonders if that’s where things went wrong.)