#im fics

     Shownu glanced up at you before proceeding with his meal. You both knew you were already aware of the answer to your question. No, Changkyun wasn’t eating, he was living off of crackers and coffee. And no, Changkyun wasn’t resting, the only sleep he was getting was from the accidental doze-offs on his books; he had drooled on the pages more often than he’d like to admit. Shownu was equally as concerned as you were, if not more. He had tried to get his friend to slow down and relax, but just like every other time, he wouldn’t listen and would proceed with his detrimental routine.

     “I’m gonna go to the library, I’ll see you later.” You sighed, picking up your possessions and waving to Shownu over your shoulder. He nodded his head as a reply before delving into his meal once again.

     You knew you were forgetting something…..it was your phone.

     Groaning in frustration, you turned in your tracks and changed your destination from your dorm building back to your initial starting point: the library. In the midst of organising all your papers into your folders and carrying the books around, you must’ve left it on the table at the library where you were studying.

     You walked up the stairs of the building with a light step; it was just past midnight and you were the only one still roaming in the pin-drop silence of the corridors. As quietly as possible, you pushed the door of the library open, the room in complete darkness. All but one large table that was lit up by an overhead lamp. There sat a person who, in that moment, you could only compare to a shining star in a pitch black blanket of sky. It was a gorgeous face, one that held the exhaustion that you knew all too well.

     “Changkyun?” You called out, tilting your head to the side.

     He lifted his head up as if it was the heaviest weight he could carry. His eyes were droopy and bloodshot, and his face was pale. He squinted his eyes, trying to make out who you were but the state he was in did not permit him to. You rushed towards him anxiously, dropping your things onto the desk and crouching down so you were on eye level with him.

     “Hey, Y/N.” Changkyun greeted, his voice croaky and small, forcing the edges of his lip to turn up into a laboured grin.

     “Changkyun, are you feeling okay?” You inquired, placing your hand over his forehead lightly only to detect a burning heat, “You’ve got a fever!”

     “I’m fine, I promise.” He murmured, wrapping his large palm over your wrist and wrenching it off of his skin. As he released his grip, you noticed his hand was shaking furiously and his messy, illegible notes proved that it had been that way for a few hours at least. Next to his work, there was your phone. Upon realising that you had noticed it, Changkyun asked, “Is it yours?”

     You nodded your head and said matter-of-factly, “Yeah, I came to get it back but that’s not the point. You’re sick, you need to rest.”

     “Y/N-“

     Cutting him off, you started arranging his papers in the best order as you could and stacked his books over yours. He complained, trying to convince you that he was healthy even though you both knew that was a lie. Eventually, he gave in to your help and slouched limply back in the chair, staring at you as he got lost in his thoughts. Although he felt like absolute garbage and that he could easily drop right then and there, surveying your actions made him beam to himself. The troubled expression on your face that he had caused pulled at his heartstrings; it was almost as if he couldn’t believe that you cared enough about him to do all this.

     You felt his eyes pouring into you, a small smile on his lips as he studied your features intently. You fixed your gaze on the chestnut wood of table, not daring to make eye contact. It took everything within you to suppress the rosy blush that was rising to your cheeks.

     “Let’s get you back to your dorm.” You instructed, picking up the stack of books that had multiplied in those few minutes. Changkyun was drained of energy so carrying his things was the least you could do for him.

     “You’ve got to be kidding me.” Changkyun cocked an eyebrow, swooping in swiftly and stealing the books from your arms, exchanging them for his lab coat. Before you could say another word, he was leading the way out of the library, a small bounce in the otherwise drowsy dragging of his feet. You shook your head, following suite.

     “We need to get you in the building as fast as possible, it’s really cold and you’re already ill.” You said once you were out in the open air headed to the male dorm building. 

     Eyes widening like saucers, Changkyun twisted in your direction, asking, “Are you cold? Put on my lab coat. It’s not that heavy but it’ll help.”

     “No, I’m alright. You put it on, you need it.” You held out the white coat out to him. He shook his head and nudged it towards you with his shoulder, urging you to follow his instructions.

     Sighing in exasperation, you put the lab coat on and crossed your arms over your chest to warm yourself up. Changkyun slowed down his pace slightly so he could be a step or two behind you to take in how you looked. His cheeks heated up at the sight; you were wearing something that was his.

     At the dorm building lobby, you hesistantly stared at the elevator as Changkyun pressed the button to head to his floor. After realising your uncertainty, he instinctively shyly went to scratch the back of his neck, however, he remembered the books he was hauling with him.

     “You could come up to my dorm if you want,” He offered, shocking you as he lost his laid back confident aura for a moment, “Jooheon’s on his exchange program so the room’s empty.”

     Backtracking at the speed of light as the tip of his ears turned a crimson colour, he added, “Not that I have anything in mind! It’s just that it’s cold outside and it’s late and we won’t do anything intimate obviously…I’ll just shut up, that would make this situation a whole lot less awkward.”

     “Your RA would kill me if I went up there.”

     “The RA is Shownu, though?” He said in confusion.

     “Exactly.”

     You chuckled and agreed, sparing him the embarrassment from his mini speech by stepping into the lift. He gratefully pressed the button for his floor and leaned back against the wall. Peeping at you from the corner of his eyes, he smirked lightly when he caught you goggling at him. You briskly shifted away and hopped out of the small space when the doors slid open. Changkyun couldn’t help thinking to himself silently, ‘So adorable’.

     At the end of the hall, Changkyun unlocked the last door and let you in, plopping the books onto his cluttered desk and allowing them to blend in with the rest of the reading material he had collected. The illness had started to take a toll on him now that he was able to register the fatigue he was experiencing. Awareness was brought to his sweating that was unnatural after being outside in the cold winter weather. You were right. He was studying to become a doctor, however, he couldn’t even diagnose himself when the signs were showing up. He was too busy being distracted by the trance you had put him in.

     “Do you have any medication? You’re a med student, you should have something.” You asked, shrugging the lab coat off your shoulders and laying it over his chair.

     “Yeah, it should be here.” He mumbled, rummaging through one of his drawers. He popped out of a pill and downed it with some water before suggesting, “We could watch a movie on my laptop, if you want?”

     Changkyun knew you wanted to stick around to make sure he was feeling alright and he allowed himself to be selfish just this once by not persisting that you go back to your dorm. This was the chance he was waiting for ever since Shownu introduced you to him on the first week of university two years ago.

     “Yeah, sounds good.” You trailed after him onto his bed and sat with your backs against the wall, your sides touching and your feet hanging off the bed. He set his laptop on top of both of your laps and let the movie of your choice play. 

     It was only background noise for the two of you, for each of you managed to get lost in daydreams about each other. You were engrained within his brain and he was etched out into yours. No matter how hard he tried to focus on the movie, his mind trailed back to you until his eyelids became heavier and heavier.

     The medication had finally kicked in. He was becoming sleepier as the minutes passed and additionally, he became bolder. In his mental state, his logical mind couldn’t possibly think of any negative outcomes. So with his heart guiding his path, he slipped his hand up to hold your cheek, slowly turned your head to face him. And in the darkness of the room, with only the computer screen acting as a light source, he pressed his lips to yours with a feather-like touch.

     He kissed you with so much gentleness and care, as if he was afraid he could break you. Although filled to the brim with passion, Changkyun remained reserved as to not chase you away or make you feel unsafe. The tenderness never departed from his mannerism and when he pulled away, you were beaming from ear to ear in disbelief.