#im chatty

spare asks please.... spare asks......

The whole point is to recognize and accept defeat, instead of trying to get rid of what you really feel. That you can’t control your emotions, only your reactions. That the more you want the suffering to end, the more you keep your mind on it. When people tell you “you have to let go”, it makes you take longer to let go, cause you then put pressure on yourself to control this letting go to not disappoint them. You know you have to let go already. And it begins by letting go of that pressure to change fast.

You also have to accept that making mistakes or not pleasing people doesn’t make you bad or less. That you don’t need to put yourself in emotional distress to convince someone, cause you wish you could prove to them that you are not what they think you are. That you don’t need to punish yourself forever. You don’t need to be what they like. It’s up to you what you wanna be. They will never understand what it is to be you and neither you will know how it feels to be them. 

To find hope again, you first have to lose it. It is not giving up on yourself. You’re just holding onto something you wish you could have now. Something that keeps your attention away from what you really need. You will find yourself back when you give up on the situation you are trying to change.

For those battling with the guiltrip spiral. I would say those things to friends in private anyway so I know it can help to find some clarity.