#iknowimstrong

It's been a couple of days  months, since I last saw you.

I told you I was going to take that last day as my last goodbye. 

The warmth of your presence, tight long hugs, and your scent. 

I miss it all. 

Call me crazy, but I was definitely crazy in love with you. 

Four years down the line, I didn't think it would be this difficult for me to get over something that people said "it was unhealthy" "he's not the one" "you can do better" "you deserve better".  Fuck that. None of them were part of the relationship and only I can say what it meant to me. It meant a whole damn lot to me. Reasons why I'm acting the way I am. Not being able to move on because it's just not time for me yet. It takes a lot of courage to just let go. Yeah I let go of some things, but not all of it. I'm the type of person who likes to hold on and try to fix things even if there's nothing to even fix. I'm still willing to fight for whatever I can fight for. I have such a different mindset and I can just feel what is coming and what I need to watch out for. Give me advice all you want, I'll listen, but I probably won't take it into consideration. Love is hard. Especially a long term one. But I'll eventually learn from it, I'll eventually move on, and I'll eventually let everything go and accept it. But as of right now, I'm still holding on even if there's nothing for me to hold onto. I know I'm strong. I know I can be happy. I know I shouldn't be a little bitch. It's gonna take time. I'm just going to have to be patient like I'm always told to do so. And that's my number one advice to everyone, is to be patient.