#iill!reader

“I told you, today’s important. No interruptions, no distractions, I’m all yours tonight but right now I have to go” He said harshly, the words came out much more venomous than Bucky had intended them 

“I know, I know, you’ve told me every day this week” Y/N huffed giving Bucky a patient smile, 

“I’ve got to go, I’ll see you tonight” Bucky said pressing yet another kiss to her forehead, Y/N had to stop herself from wincing at the pressure already building in her head. She watched as Bucky left their bedroom, she knew that the deal was too important for her to even attempt to get Bucky to stay and look after her. Reminding herself that it would only be at most 18 hours she laid her head back down on the pillow. Y/N tried to convince herself that she couldn’t get much worse in only a few hours. 

— — — 

Y/N was wrong, completely and utterly wrong. The gentle throbbing in her head had turned into pounding, she couldn’t stop herself from violently shaking despite however many blankets she pulled over herself. She reached out to grab the glass on water she kept on her bedside cabinet only to find it empty, with an exhausted groan she lifted herself up onto her feet, only to find her vision going blurry and the room turning black. 

Y/N blinked open her eyes to find herself on the soft carpet of the bedroom floor, she let out a painful sob as she reached for her phone, not daring to think about the consequences she pressed the speed dial button. 

“Buck” She whined 

— — — 

Bucky sat with his head in his hands as Stark sat opposite him, deals like this were his least favourite Stark was sarcastic and deadly smart. The kind of man Bucky hated having to sit in a room with, but it was better to suffer a few hours to have such a man as an ally. 

“I suppose we should start talking numbers then” Stark said eyeing Bucky up and down, before Bucky could even think to open his mouth his phone cut him off, his obnoxiously loud ringtone filled the office, “Something else more important?” Stark said with a raised brow 

“Of course not” Bucky said quickly declining the call, not bothering to look at the caller

“Good, well I was thinking—” Stark was cut off by the ringtone once more, Bucky quickly fumbled to put his phone on do not disturb, only to find it already was. He had to resist screaming in frustration as he realised Y/N’s were the only calls to go through Do Not Disturb. She knew how important it was to him and here she was running it. “It seems you have something else to attend” Stark said 

“I apologise Stark, this rarely happens” Bucky insisted “Shall we continue?” Bucky suggested, 

“Sure” Stark said warily, 

“I believe you were about to tell me what you were—” Bucky said only to be cut off once more by the piecing ringtone. 

“Listen Barnes, I understand that whatever and whoever that is needs your attention. I’m a busy man Barnes so I will try to reschedule but I am making no promises” Stark said standing up and straightening out his suit 

“We have the day, I will turn my phone off Stark. I apologise for this” He said flustering, he was loosing his cool and he hated it 

“We don’t have today anymore Barnes, I am going to think about my options” Stark said leaving Bucky’s door open as he left. 

Bucky roared a string of curse words and saw red. After a few moments he turned to look at his trashed office, but his anger hadn’t disappeared not one bit, there was only one person he could focus his frustration on, and that was person who had lost him the most important deal of his life, Y/N. 

— — — —  

Bucky stormed into his house, rage filling his senses. Taking the stairs in twos he made his way towards his bedroom. 

“Y/N” He roared “I swear to god, I told you how important this was to me” he shouted swinging open the door 

“Buck?” She said opening her eyes a little, she had managed to clamber herself back into bed but her sickness still overwhelmed her, 

“What the hell were you thinking? You knew not to bother me today. What was so important huh?” He roared “did you need another hand out from me? Want me to pay something else useless that you wanted to beg me for?” Bucky didn’t even know where the words came from, they weren’t true, not even half true but he wanted Y/N to feel guilty. 

“Bucky I didn’t—”

“You didn’t what Y/N? Didn’t mean to ruin my life? Didn’t mean to fuck everything up, ‘cause that seems to be what you’re good at” Bucky roared, Y/N felt herself tear up not trusting her own words “And now you’re going to cry your way out? Like hell you are, get out!” He screamed 

“I don’t—” 

“Get out Y/N!” He roared pulling the duvet and blankets off of her shivering body, “I don’t care where you go, just get the hell out”

Y/N stood up on shaky legs attempting to shake off the blurred vision, she swayed on her feet her breathing began to quicken as the anxiety over took her and suddenly the room went dark again. Bucky stood frozen as Y/N collapsed, instantly he rushed forward in an attempt to stop her from crashing onto the floor, he was just in time to grab her head before it hit the wooden floors. Cradling her body he let himself take in the state of the room, the empty box of pills which was full this morning, the mountain of blankets crumpled next to the duvet, and the pile of items Y/N kept on her bedside table strewn across the floor. Bucky instantly put the pieces together, Y/N must have passed out before, that was the only explanation. She was sick, and he made everything so much worse. 

— — 

Y/N blinked open her eyes to find herself wrapped up tightly in her duvet, she was sure she didn’t fall asleep here. Then suddenly the memory of Bucky screaming filled her mind and the tears fell down her cheeks silently at the thought of letting him down. 

“Morning sleepyhead” Dr Banner said from her bedside, “You gave Barnes quite the scare there, I’ve just given you a once over. You’ve got the flu, you’re to stay in bed for the next week minimum” He said firmly “Understand?” Y/N nodded silently not daring to talk in fear of what Bucky might say, she instantly knew he would be frustrated with the fact that he would feel obligated to look after her until she was well, especially since he’d just ended things. 

“Bruce, how is she?” Bucky asked stepping into the room 

“Ask her yourself” Banner smiled to Y/N, “I’m going to head out and give you some time” 

“Thanks” Bucky muttered making his way over to his side of the bed, climbing in he opened his arms expecting Y/N to curl herself around him instantly. He heard Banner close the door, they were alone. “Doll?” He whispered 

“I’ll be gone in a few hours, just need some strength” She said quietly, her voice breaking a little 

“No you won’t, you’re to stay in bed until you’re better” Bucky instructed 

“It’s fine, I’ll call my sister. She can come and get me. I’ll have to hire a company so it might take longer to take some of my stuff but I promise I’ll be gone as soon as possible” She said 

“Y/N look at me” Bucky said his heart breaking at how dejected Y/N sounded 

“It’s fine, I know when to leave. I’ve overstayed my welcome” 

“Like hell you have!” Bucky snapped “Doll please listen to me, I fucked up. I fucked up so badly and I swear I’ll never stop trying to make it up to you” 

“I said it’s fine, I screwed up the Stark deal. Like you said I fuck everything up so I should just go” Y/N said, Bucky grabbed her wrist gently, forcing her to face him 

“Y/N, doll, baby please” He pleaded “I should have never gotten mad at you, I know you only called me because you were sick, I should have realised before and I hate that I didn’t but I need you to stay, I can’t live without you, please doll I’m not asking for your forgiveness I don’t deserve that, I just need you to stay and say that we’re going to work on this. I’ll be a better man for you I swear” 

“Bucky I—” Y/N whispered before the sobs cut though her words, 

“Breath doll, in and out” Bucky said rubbing her back “Slowly Y/N” 

“Felt so ill… I’m sorry Buck, I didn’t want to call you but I was so scared when I woke up on the floor and couldn’t see properly—”

“You did the right thing, I should have come sooner and I’m so sorry I didn’t. I swear I’m never letting you out my sight again” He said 

“What happened to the deal?” Y/N whispered 

“I explained to Stark that my girl needed me and if he couldn’t understand then he should go fuck himself” Bucky said bluntly “You’re more important than any deal” 

“Was he mad?” 

“Not at all, I don’t want you worrying about that” 

“I screwed it up for you” Y/N wept 

“You didn’t screw anything up, Y/N, doll, I promise you everything I said was a lie. I was just angry” 

“At me? It was my fault” 

“Initially yes, but I was more angry with myself for not realising you needed me” 

“What’s happened to us Buck?” She asked quietly “we used to be so good” 

“I know doll,” He sighed, she looked up at him with sad eyes and he felt his heart break “Doll, I’m going to take a few months off and we can just be us, get back to where we were how does that sound?” He suggested 

“You shouldn’t do that for me, i’m not worth it” 

“I’d do anything for you doll, you deserve the whole universe. I promise you we’re going to get this sorted” 

“Do you hate me?” 

“I could never, doll I’m so in love with you” Bucky said sincerely, 

“I don’t know if I can say it back yet” She admitted 

“I wouldn’t expect you to after how I just acted, just please tell me you don’t want to give up on me?” 

“Never Buck, I’m never giving up on you, you’re it for me. Don’t want anyone else” 

Taglist :)