Like A Bird (Harpy Girlfriend)
You wiped down the already-clean bar out of boredom. Usually around this time of night on the weekend, Sparks, the club you worked at as a bartender, was so busy you barely had time to catch your breath. But for some reason, the club was just dead tonight, there were a few stragglers here and there, but they were all cheapskates who bought one drink and then proceeded to nurse it for the rest of the night. Leaving you, leaning on the bar wishing you could at least fiddle around with your phone to pass the time. Not a chance though, your boss is super-strict, she didnât care if there were 4 patrons in the club or 40, you better not let anything distract you from serving them unless you wanted to get fired. You sighed, wishing there were something around that could relieve you of your utter boredom.
As if the universe had heard your silent plea, suddenly, the most gorgeous harpy you had ever seen walked through the front doors. Dressed in scant blood-red fabric, jet-black talons making an audible clicking noise that seemed to reverberate throughout Sparks, her silver feathers glinted under the club lights. You struggled to keep your jaw from dropping, and quickly looked away. Frantically, you did your best to look busy by picking up an (already clean) glass and proceeding to shine it with the same rag you were wiping down the counter with earlier.
The yet-to-be-named harpy made a beeline towards you as soon as she spotted the bar. Sitting down on one of the stools, she said âGive me whatever it takes to get as drunk as quickly as possible and keep âem coming until Iâm wasted.âÂ
You hurriedly prepared her the most expensive drink you knew how to make (as per your bossâ instructions whenever someone didnât order something specific) and tentatively slid it over. âUm,â you stammered, âthatâll be-â
Before you could tell her the price, she handed you a hundred dollar bill and said âTell me when this stops being enough, and thereâll be more where that came from.âÂ
You nodded mutely, watching as she downed the overpriced cocktail like a shot, and handed you the glass for a refill. Now you normally arenât interested in making conversation with the customers, but there was just something about her that made you want to know more. So, as you prepared her drink, you desperately tried to think of something to say. âSo... what... brings you here... today?â
Internally cringing at how awkward you sounded, you slid over the harpyâs second drink, head bowed in shame. Whether she was just friendly, or because she took pity on you, the mystery harpy deigned to answer. âI finally managed to ditch my ex-girlfriend. Fuckinâ bitch.â
At the mention of a girlfriend, (more importantly, an ex-girlfriend) your heart skipped a beat. Feigning casualty, you asked âOh really? Congratulations.â
âThanks.â she said, your nerves flying right over her head. âI finally managed to explain to her that itâs not a poly relationship if I catch you fucking my cousin in our hotel room.â
âYou didnât let me finish. On our anniversary.â
You winced. Without a word, you poured her a shot of whisky and passed it over. After downing the shot, she said âYeah. And the best part was, I might of considered it you know? More people to love right? But not when she goes around sneaking behind my back instead of discussing it with me first, and not on our anniversary, and not with my cousin.â She pauses to guzzle down the rest of the cocktail.
âThatâs rough buddy.â
The harpy almost hacks up her cocktail. You suppress the urge to laugh as she struggles to compose herself. Once sheâs got her breath back, she giggles and says âYeah. Yeah it was. Thanks for being understanding.â
âNo problem.â I say with a grin on my face, cleaning up the mess on the bar and handing her another drink. We actually start to hit it off from there, chatting while she drank. My boss couldnât even get mad at me for it because Iera (eventually she told me her name) was currently the only paying customer in the club.
That is, until a guy, who up until that point had been nursing a single cheap beer in the corner, sat in the stool next to Iera. âAnother one of these please.â He said, holding up the bottle so I could see what brand he had. I nodded and went to grab one out of the cooler, meanwhile he had turned towards Iera, attempting to chat her up. âSo baby, what brings you here?â The guy said with a smirk on his face, placing a hand on Ieraâs knee.
âYouâre barking up the wrong tree.â Iera said bluntly, shifting away from the guyâs grasp.Â
âAw come on baby. Someone as sexy as you must want someone to take home.â
Iera opened her mouth to say something, but then she paused for a moment. Glancing at me, a grin spread over her face as she said âYouâre right. But youâre not the one I had in mind.â Before I could react, Ieraâs mouth was on mine, almost making me drop the bottle in my hand.
The kiss was hot and wet and over too soon. Before I knew it, she had released me. Grabbing a napkin and taking a pen out from her purse, Iera scrawled down her number and pressed the napkin into my hand while I stood there, gaping like a fish. âCall me when your shift is over baby.â She purred, then with a wink, Iera turned and strutted out the door.
While Ieraâs rejected suitor grumbled into his beer, I looked down at the crumpled up napkin in my hands. I wondered if she was actually serious or if she was just drunk. Either way, I thought to myself, as soon as my shift is over, I am definitely going to find out.