#i am processing

i hope he keeps his form and i hope mclaren will be smart in the next races, even though I'm not sure they will - i think this weekend had the best outcome possible honestly: better in quali twice, better race and the crash wasn't Lando's fault

it was good, wasn't it? i'm still processing all that happened, but overall it seems like such a strong answer to all the noise in the weeks after singapore and the messy 'repercussions' media day. it wasn't luck, but even the big things that went wrong, went wrong in a way to his advantage, like losing points in the sprint sucked, but it was oscar (of all people) who was the one who hit him to take him out, and then finishing what, 20s behind in the race? which was something.

it was nice to see how lando delivered when it mattered in qualifying both times, and even though a lot of people have a lot to say about the fact he wasn't able to drop an immediate overtake of charles despite charles's near perfect defense, better tire strategy, race data, clean air, and strong enough pace to be a problem, he was still able to follow close for lap after lap (not easy), be smart about his tires, and pass cleanly on track, twice, under restriction because of track limits.

it really was a mature drive from lando, not hectic or desperate at all, despite the lack of data. it's been fascinating watching this year with the trajectory of him becoming increasingly comfortable in the car at the same time as other teams have been catching up to meet their dominance. early in the year he pushed too hard, overdrove at 105% instead of trusting the pace at 95%, and it didn't serve him well then, but all his work in mastering the car is sure serving him now.

ok "casual" but here is the background of what i knew going in: i watched all the tour promo videos that they had uploaded to youtube. i knew we were getting the black parade and i knew there was a story in progress and those videos would probably set the vibe. in my gay mind: it's theatrical like gaga's show (btw collab when??? when i first heard disease last year it reminded me of mcr right away, yall remember gerard saw her in LA he loved it ik it). i knew the b stage set would follow and that we would get the hits but a lot of it was up in the air, i was really hoping for cemetery drive :)))))))) (bc i was fuckin LOOPING and writing about that one within the past couple years but i have been otherwise mostly dormant as an mcr fan like three cheers never sitting outside my top 10 albums of all time but i'm not actively thinking about them a whole lot) (maybe separate post to come about three cheers bc despite what i just said i feel like i'm listening to it for the first time rn like i was never really paying attention to the lyrics and story and holy shit guys - also a lot of this does just hit harder as an adult)

i was floor seating ray side (pretty close to where his grand immortal dictator was stationed in the audience like he was a little to the right and behind me) and the two people i was closest to were on either side of my experience level. there was a younger fan who knew all the beats and lore (which was very helpful!) and a girl in her 20s who was having the Best time and everything was a surprise to her. i didn't dress up but i like that everyone understood u gotta be wearing black at base level i think that's beautiful.

biggest thing i was telling everyone walking out: gerard fucking slayed oh my god. i did not expect the level of accents. he's REALLY in it and really hasn't aged, i knew he has it in him but i didn't know he was still going that fucking hard every night he is a Performer as strong as any pop girl his beam of energy and charisma is sooo serious u guys!!!! absolute pro

elexecution: everyone near me did have signs and they were normal yea/nay. vast majority of people voting yea. i voted nay! i was not sure if i was voting for the right thing! even though it was the most straightforward version of the signs that exist it's still confusing (not a complaint this is true of real elections also, i think it's achieving what it's meant to). also the whole time i was in chicago i was like omg this is just like bioshock is this moment not giving bioshock infinite so hard.

loved marianne right away, no need to elaborate. i love how that section of mama gets so built up it deserves it - dagger is fun it's been stuck in my head! famous last words was everything i wanted it to be it's like ur in the music video i will think about it forever probably. i posted about it before but sleep!!!!! those lights are so cool the rocket imagery works so well god that song fucks it's so loud and good :) a lot of people did boo when gerard got slapped we said noooo.

b stage: no u guys they really are having SO much fun, this was immediately obvious. they opened with venom at the beginning of the first set i was like "oh my god this is actually happening" and then it hit me all over again. everyone walks in a circle but again i was mostly towards ray and yeah just smiling the whole time

MIKEY: he looks like he just found out he's in mcr and it's awesome! like that was not what he played like in my memory he literally looks so happy. i started fancamming him the ghost of my 12 year old self took over in that moment.

they did do cemetery drive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i screamed so loud so did everybody else. also prison. more three cheers please please i'm so greedy :O not okay was sooooooo good too one of the best as u would expect so much fun. the cool thing about mcr is they don't have a bad song. world is ugly was crazy bc i remember before that song was released and we never knew if we were gonna get it.

the smashing pumpkins of it all! okay i was doing chicago tourism the whole day, seeing lots of mcr fans (and oasis fans! it was a big labor day weekend for chicago!) and at one point i saw someone wearing the zero shirt and thinking to myself: ohh yeah that's how you fuckin do it (i had the zero shirt when i was 12 lol). they have always been such intertwined bands so this felt soo huge to witness especially for mike. i used to fantasize about telling them from lotms about their success and it kinda felt like that. bullet on butterfly wings is obviously a fucking banger everyone was super into it.

Daily blues harmonica

Carved out with sand paper

Torn out

Missing a piece

9/10 show. Stunning. Beautiful. Perfect. Almost cried. Lost my voice. But no Adam :(

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