#hypersexualisation tw

create a timeline of at least five important events in your muse’s life and include an explanation of the importance of each.

APRIL 2004

yena is eight. it’s a calm sunday morning, the entire family is dressed in their nicest clothes to go church, the nam sisters each dressed in delicate, frilly white dresses. amidst the ruckus of getting ready, yena slips out of the house into the backyard, hoping to quickly retrieve her hoola hoop that had gotten stuck in the cherry tree last night as they had been playing out in the yard, knowing she’ll be hopelessly scolded for being so careless with her toys if her parents find out. she doesn’t retrieve the hoola hoop, instead, yena topples out of the tree with an ugly smack, pretty dress stained blood red and grass green. when her mother finds her crying, she doesn’t comfort her or clear her wounds, she simply sends yena a withering look, stating she doesn’t have time for this before ordering the entire family to take their leave without yena. in the end its yena herself who cleans the wounds on her knees with trembling hands. → (alternatively: yena learns that keeping up pretenses will always matter more than her wellbeing)

FEBRUARY 2008

yena is twelve. it’s the first time she skips school, her and a couple friends coming to the conclusion that they can’t be bothered to go to p.e. and history and instead, taking the last couple of hours of their school day off to hang around a nearby corner store. the next morning, they’re all called into the principals office, greatly scolded and punished with cleaning duty untill the end of the month. all but yena. her friends scoff that it must be easy, being the principles daughter, skirting around trouble. hours later, curled up in a corner of her bedroom, crying her eyes out while cupping her throbbing cheek, yena doubts it’s all that easy to begin with.  → (alternatively: yena learns the price of misbehaving)

JUNE 2009

yena is thirteen. it should have felt like victory, rubbing the trainee contract in her parents’ faces. she had found a way to get out and away, escape their grasp and she had done it all by herself. at the audition, they had told her she two things, a pretty face and potential (not talent, not yet, but yena didn’t yet know that was something entirely different), higher praise than either of her parents had ever given her. sure, she had anticipated they would be angry, for lying, for skipping school, for going behind their backs. she hadn’t however, anticpated her mother to stare her down as she signed the trainee contract, though not without snidely remarking that if yena wants to learn things the hard way, she’s free to but that sooner or later she’ll be right back, hopefully having learned her lesson.  → (alternatively: yena learns she should have known better than to expect them to want her to stay.)

SEPTEMBER 2019 

yena is twenty-three. it’s been a while since she’s last been home but she still shows up, ocassionally, to save face. she doesn’t really want to nor do her parents really want to see her but they never outright tell her to stay away. it’s been a while since she last went home, maybe that’s why she doesn’t know her sister is set to get married in a week, the news reaches her by accident more than anything else, through an old friend from school she catches up with and yena has to try her hardest not to let it show that this is surprising to her, that she wasn’t invited. she calls yein that same night to confirm, to ask why her oldest should simply pretend she doesn’t exist. yein gives her some weak excuses about figuring yena would be too busy anyway (nonsense, calpyso hasn’t promoted since march, aren’t set to promote soon either) before eventually letting her true colors show. “must we do this yena? have you not put this family through enough?” yein asks her. yena hangs up soon after that, she’s heard enough. →  (alternatively: yena learns that leaving a family is easier than expected.)

NOVEMBER 2019

yena is twenty-four, as of today exactly. her parents haven’t called, none of her sisters have texted, there has been a complete radio silence since that phonecall with yein. it’s okay though, yena doesn’t mind, not when she’s squished between the other calypso members at their favorite hotpot restaurant, the table decked out in yummy foods and empty soju bottles, a small cake somewhere placed towards the end of the table in an attempt to keep it safe from their antics. sure, things are far from perfect, calypso as a group is hanging on by a thread, their career unsure and underwhelming but yena is cherished, she is wanted, she is loved. for now that is enough to build a home out of.  →  (alternatively: yena learns that making a family is very simple, you siply choose them, and they choose you back)

what is your muse’s fatal flaw / biggest flaw?

yena craves external validation, no, she needs it. as a deeply unloved, often ignored child growing into a hypersexualised adult, the one thing that has always kept her world spinning was the praise from others. up until this day, yena depends on outside sources to validate her, her own opinion on things doesn’t matter, it’s of no use if she thinks she looks pretty, if she thinks she sang well up on stage, if she thinks she acted well in a certain drama, none of it matters if other people don’t feel the same way. yena has long since discarded the importance of her own opinon, instead overly fixated on what everyone thinks about her. she might try to act careless all she wants, like she’s above it all with infallible self-confidence that can’t be shaken but it’s far from the truth, it could in fact not be more untrue, not when she’s dead terrified of being deemed not interesting enough, not pretty enough, not talented enough, not worth anyone’s time.

what is one of your muse’s core values? name a situation where they might consider sacrificing/changing this core value.

yena isn’t introspective enough to know her own core values, that would take an amount of self-awareness she simply lacks. if you’d ask her about her values, she’d probably come up empty. one of her main driving forces, however, is a drive for absolute autonomy yena wants to be able to whatever she wants, and not do whatever she does’t want to do, simple as that. if anything, her urge for freedom takes it a little bit too far and she could stand to be a little more nuanced in her stance. adapting this value more mildly. a way to achieve that is probably through a comitted, long term relationship. yena has been fearfully skirting around the concept of serious, comitted love for a long time, out of fear of being robbed from her autonomy once more, to be stuck adhering to someone elses terms. it would do yena good to realize that a good, healthy relationship won’t do that.

what does your character want more than anything else in the world? Is this a conscious desire or a subconscious one?

yena wants to find a place she belongs. it’s definitely a subconscious thought, as stated before yena lacks the sort of introspection needed for it but all yena really craves is to find her place, where she feels comfortable, where she doesn’t constantly have to strain herself to be considered good enough, to be considered worth loving. affection has always been a conditional currency in her life, something that had to be earned growing up, only given when adhering exactly to their parents’ expectations. becoming an idol hasn’t really improved that, the general public is fickle and infamous for going from loving to hating a public figure in a matter of moments. yena longs for a comfortable space where she doesn’t have to constantly prove herself, maybe, if she finds that, she will finally stop feeling so damn inferior all the time.

as a mun, if you could give your muse one piece of advice, what would it be?