#husk's hellhole

@xgay-spiderx

"What the hell? Listen here, ya creepy weirdo. First off, I ain't got 'little paws,' I've got claws that'll shred ya to ribbons if you try any of that ticklin' nonsense. Second, I sleep on a bar stool half the time anyway, so good luck with that. And third, if you're really my bed, then you're probably sticky, smell like booze, and covered in cat hair. Congrats on bein' the least appealing bed in all of Hell. Now scram before I decide to set ya on fire for good measure."

"...."

"Raises an eyebrow, looking skeptical What kinda messed up choices are those? sighs and takes a swig from his bottle Look, if I gotta choose... grumbles I guess I'd go with the jazz club. quickly adds But only 'cause I can't stand Lucifer's smug face, got it? looks away, trying to hide a slight blush Besides, Al knows his music. Might actually be tolerable. mutters Unlike some rubber duck bullshit. clears throat But don't go gettin' any ideas. It's just the lesser of two evils, ya hear?"

"Grumbles but doesn't pull his hand away Alright, alright, don't get too excited. I've got standards when it comes to booze, ya know. Glances down at their joined hands, then at the person's height Heh, 4'10"? No wonder you're lookin' up at me like that. I'm practically a giant compared to you, pipsqueak. Smirks Just don't expect me to grab anything off the top shelf for ya. That's what step stools are for. Now, let's see what kinda hooch you're offerin'. And remember, if it ain't quality, the deal's off faster than you can say 'jackpot.'"

"Blinks in surprise, looking slightly flustered Well, I'll be damned... again. That was, uh... clears throat not half bad, kid. Didn't expect you to taste like wine - and the good stuff at that. narrows eyes You been drinkin' my potential booze? shakes head Ah, whatever. It was... mumbles ...kinda nice. speaks up But don't go gettin' any ideas. This was a business transaction, got it? Now, about that booze you promised... extends hand Let's see the goods. And maybe... glances away, looking slightly embarrassed ...we can discuss future 'business deals' over a drink or two. But don't you dare tell anyone I said that, capisce?"

"Well, well, well... Looks like you're not just all talk after all. eyes the cash suspiciously That's a hefty pile of dough you've got there, sweetheart. But remember, this is Hell - I've seen enough scams to last me nine lifetimes. Still... leans in closer, sniffing the air That cash smells real enough. Alright, you've got my attention. But let's get one thing straight - I ain't some cheap date. You want these lips? You better be ready for a real kiss, not some schoolyard peck. And that booze better be top-shelf stuff, none of that watered-down swill. sighs and shakes his head Can't believe I'm doin' this... but a deal's a deal. Pucker up, sugar, and let's see if you're gettin' your money's worth. He leans in more and kisses them"