#hobbithabitthings

Pairing: none yet! Word count: 1146                                                                                               Summary; You just wanted a normal day for once but turns out you just can’t and end falling into middle earth and accompanying Thorin’s epic quest          Warnings: Swearing                                                                                            A/N: Hey guys this is my first fanfic on here and I’m planning on making this a series I guess! I hope you like it, suggestions and requests are open too!

It really was just your luck to end up in the situation you were in now. All you wanted on this fateful day was a break from the endless piles of paper given to you from your professors and a cup of coffee. But no, ohhhh no, you just had to take an accidental dive down the stairs, drop your laptop into a muddy puddle and suffer from possible brain trauma caused by a certain professor of yours.

It really wasn't his fault, you just had a bad habit of standing in the wrong place at the right time, and when he threw the football across the room to another student, well...It just so happened to collide with your temple.

And speaking of the situation you currently were in now, it involved a ridiculous amount of alcohol, shitty friends, and low spirits. You wanted to be in bed, safe and warm, not here in some stupid forest with a bunch of drunk students you barely knew.

Your so called "friend" who brought you here in the first place had disappeared a little over an hour ago and you suspected she had forgotten about you and left you stranded. Of course, the walk back to your dorm was only two miles away, but the forest was unfamiliar and dark. You'd rather be in a heated car than walk alone in a creepy old forest if you were being completely honest.

Yet, the world decided to dish out more bad luck today and gave you the opportunity to possibly get murdered by a psycho killer waiting in the woods for someone to walk by. And with your kind of luck, you'd be their victim. But what other choice did you have?

You sighed and grumbled under your breath and poured the rest of your beverage over gnarled tree roots and maneuvered towards the dirt path that led to town. You hoped dumping beer on a tree wasn't considered littering...

Pulling your phone's flashlight out after leaving the glare of strung up lanterns and headlights from cars, you focused on not tripping over your feet like you did this morning. At least if you did trip no one would see you this time. Though, it would still suck to land in the dirt and rip a hole in your leggings or shirt. Your occurring clumsiness probably increased your chances of tripping and impaling yourself on a stick or perhaps falling off a cliff anyways, so you weren't too hopeful.

So, with thoughts of impeding doom and your eyes on the lookout for any roots or rocks that could of caught your foot, you continued on the pathway to civilization and safety. That is, until you picked your head up and realized you hadn't been following the trail at all.

"Oh fuck me," you growled, wildly spinning around. Your flashlight illuminated patches of the dark woods and cast shadows that vaguely reminded you of deformed creatures lurking in the trees.

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." You hissed as an afterthought. Here you were lost in the woods, swearing like a sailor with no way out. Of course something like this would happen to you.  

An overwhelming wave of panic surged over you after spinning around in circles and doing nothing but curse and try remembering which way you had come before this happened. You took a deep breath, attempting to calm your fraying nerves and paused before a patch of the brooding forest. It really couldn't get any worse than this.

You bit your lip, took a deep breath, and shuffled through the undergrowth praying to whatever god was out there you could somehow manage to find the path again and that this was the right direction.

It wasn't, and you quickly found that out right after your foot caught on a twisting root and sent you sailing down the side of a hill you never knew existed until now. You cried out in shock and pain as sharp rocks and dirt scratched your skin as you fell.

I shouldn't of poured beer on that poor tree was the last thing you thought before being enveloped into total darkness.

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"Is she dead?"

"'Course not ye fool! Tha' lass is still breathin'!

"Aye, last time I checked corpses don't breath."

"Do you think she's alright?"

"Where on Earth did the lass come from?"

Unfamiliar voices crowded around you when you drifted back into consciousness, unaware of where you were, what time it was, or how you got out of the forest. You groaned as the various tones of buzzing voices became louder and you became more aware of the pounding headache present behind your eyes and the throbbing pain on your scalp.

"Shush! She's wakin' up."

You groaned again and placed a hand over your throbbing head before opening your eyes. Blurred faces gazed down at you with curious eyes and you had to blink a couple of times before registering what the actual fuck was going on. Last night you were lost in a forest and now you were circled by a ban of funny looking men with a whole lot of hair.

Your first instinct was to scream and the run and then maybe cry a little bit from the shock of falling down a hill and landing in who knows where, but the only thing you did was squeak in fear.

"Och, give 'er some room, lads!" An older looking man chided, his hand gripping a strange trumpet-like item as he shoved away some of your audience. Though, the longer you were sprawled out upon the ground, the longer you realized how short these men actually were. You were one to talk though, you had always been on the short side but seeing full grown men who were as tall as you were was a sight to behold.

"Why are you all so short...?"

You really hadn't meant for it slip out, but a combination of your confusion and your throbbing head let it pass through your lips. A few guffaws and shaking heads made you groan inwardly at your stupidity.

Way to make a great first impression, (y/n)...

"Have ye never seen a dwarf?" One of them asked, a floppy hat resting atop his head.

"Dwarf?" You repeated, your eyebrows furrowing in confusion. "Like Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs?"

"Who's that?" Another asked. "And why do they have seven dwarves with them?"

A murmur of agreement swept through the group and left you in an even deeper state of confusion. Who didn't know who Snow White was? The grey haired  so called 'dwarf' with the strange trumpet thing must of noticed your puzzlement and bent down on one knee to help lift you into a sitting position.

"What's your name, girl?"

Pairing: none yet! (fem reader btw) (but shoot me a pairing!) Word count: 1,242                                                                                            Summary; You just wanted a normal day for once but turns out you just can’t and end falling into middle earth and accompanying Thorin’s epic quest         Warnings: Swearing, awkward reader, modern!oblivious!reader   

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It was a dream-it had to be, or else it was a really shitty prank and you were having none of it.

"I'm dreaming, it must be a dream. Yeah, no way I'm actually here...sitting in the middle of fucking nowhere with dwarves... J-just a dream." You whispered to yourself, your arms covering your head while you rocked back and forth. Maybe if you closed your eyes and just concentrated you'd wake up in your own bed with a hangover, the only explanation to this wild occurrence.

"If yer tryin' to wish us away, it 'ent workin'." One of them commented.

Fuck me, you wailed internally.

You really did have the worst luck in the world. Only you would end up in a situation like this; thrown off a cliff, betrayed by your own foot, and teleported into an alternate reality of some sort with tiny men sporting excess amounts of hair and various sharp weapons. Although, nearly right after you fell into mild hysteria, the only normal sized person here who had a grey beard and pointy hat came to your rescue with a cup of tea and gentle reassurance. He called himself Gandalf and he patiently explained where you were and who the strange men around were.

Like that helped any.

And after having that slight panic attack, you seated yourself on the ground as the Company eyed you with pity. Thus leading us to the present time, where you still sat.      

"Oh, I really shouldn't of poured beer on that tree!" You sobbed, earning a few confused stares.

"My dear," Gandalf sighed, placing a gentle hand on your shaking shoulder. "I do not know how you fell into this world, no do I know how to return you to your own, but for your own sake you eventually must get up."

"It's better down here."

Another collective sigh. Gandalf scoffed and shook his head, you were nearly as stubborn as a dwarf!

"Why-"

"Gandalf, let me speak with the girl." A deep rumbling voice interjected what the old wizard was about to say. You could feel the power behind his words and how rich each syllable sounded, leading you to the notion that perhaps the speaker was somehow had ties to royalty or just really full of himself.

Heavy footsteps stomped over to your hunched figure, steel-tipped boots entering the slanted view through your crossed arms. You curled into yourself even more as he let out his own deep sigh and muttered something under his breath.

Just as you parted your lips to threaten the dwarf into leaving you alone, a rough hand snatched your arm and yanked you from the ground with enough force to eject you into the sun, most likely. "Get up."

You squeaked in surprise and nearly toppled face first into the dwarf, but his firm grip on your arm steadied you. You readied a poisonous glare just for him, but it died away and you though better of it after seeing his own cold scowl that rivaled your own. You were taken aback after putting the tone of his voice to a face and just like his words, he was powerful and rich in features.

"That wasn't speaking," you grumbled after a slight pause. "that was manhandling."

The left end of his darkly bearded lips twitched ever so slightly in response to your sass, and he quirked a dark brow. "I saw no other option."

With that he released your arm and spun on his heel, midnight locks streaked with silver flowing behind him. "Dwalin, keep an eye on her."

Gandalf tutted in reply and waved an arm over your shoulders, wheeling you away before the even scarier dwarf with geometric tattoos and muscles for days could keep you tethered to his side.

As Gandalf led you to God-knows-where, you surveyed your surroundings and couldn't help but admire the surrounding scenery of rolling green hills, distant forests, and brooding mountains far to the east. Even if you were here against your will, it sure beat any scenery back at home you thought impressive. But it still didn't make up for the sharp pang of home sickness...

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It turned out your unexpected arrival delayed whatever it was the group of dwarves, a wizard, and an even smaller creature with bare hairy feet that puzzled you greatly, were doing and so, sooner than you liked, you were hoisted onto a pony without your consent. Not like they cared of course...

The first few days they were skeptical of you tagging along(not that you wanted to), especially Thorin who you assumed to be the leader of them, but a few stern words from a meddling wizard changed his mind. But who could blame them? You pretty much fell from the sky and landed smack-dab in the middle of their camp without warning. Who wouldn't be suspicious?

At least the strange little creature seemed to take an instant liking towards you and shared his sympathies. And after a few attempts of trying to engaging you in conversation you learned his name; Bilbo Baggins, a Hobbit from the Shire. You didn't know what a hobbit was or why he was abnormally short with hairy feet, but you found him quite adorable and his odd mannerisms piqued you interest. He even offered to share his blanket with you!

You soon learned during the long hours of endless traveling that the Company was on a quest of sorts to reclaim a mountain lost to an over sized lizard with wings. Bilbo and some other members of the company thought your snide comment about Smaug was funny, Thorin did not and you succeeded in creating an even more horrid situation for yourself. Oh well.

Then there was the princes, Fíli and Kíli, whom you almost immediately became fast friends with after sharing ideas on how to properly prank a person. Not to mention your biting remarks that Fíli and Kíli found absolutely marvelous. Their particular favorite sassy remark being the one where you might of accidentally told their Uncle he had a stick up his ass in front of the whole Company. Oops.

And how could you forget about Bofur and Ori? Your first night with the Company, after easing back into your own skin after the traumatizing experience of falling into another world, you cracked a bawdy joke to ease some of the tension you had caused and Bofur eagerly responded with an even filthier one. A start of a beautiful friendship you liked to think.

Ori was shy and you all but adored him. He even gave you his extra change of clothing(you had never seen anyone blush as red as he did in that moment) and sheepishly showed you some of his drawings on the third night.

In the short time you had been here you began to grow fond of the Company, even Mr. Thorin Grumpypants and his dutiful sidekick, the miniature Hulk minus the green skin and a whole lot more tattoos than the actual Hulk. Though, even the two in mention, begrudgingly realized that you had grown on them, even if you were a bit odd and swore like a sailor.

You momentarily forgot about your life in the modern world, but you were reminded each time you felt yourself subconsciously reach for your phone to check your social media and your Snap Streaks.

Wait...If you were here and your phone was sitting on your bedside table in another dimension that meant-