#himeaki

Just realized that Aki took Angel to the restaurant where he and Himeno used to eat at, and he even ordered the same food....

I've noticed a lot of people don't really like Himeno and one of the reasons being her apparent romantic attraction to Aki ( and also other than the fact that she almost slept with Denji ) and lmao I do get the hate to some degree but sometimes it feels lowkey forced. And that's why the relationship she shares with Aki kinda gets misinterpreted or it get's watered down to a 'oh he is hot I want to fuck him'

So I just kinda wanna yap my interpretation of their relationship cuz it's not just a typical one sided hetero relationship, it has a lot of layers to it.

For one, I do think what Himeno feels for Aki is more of a personification of her idea of being remembered and mourned. Until Aki came Himeno had a number of partners and subordinates simply dying on her, and it's a very prominent part of her character; watching the people she worked with die. As Kishibe says, Public safety devil hunters have to have a few screws loose and as I say it, you got to have thick skin. The idea of having a 'few screws loose ' including lacking empathy over time which means you don't mourn the death of your comrades.

But Himeno is normal. A country mouse sticking to the city mouse ( Aki ) for his company when she would rather live in the quiet countryside instead. Here there is a lot of parallel between Angel devil and Himeno as they both longed to stay by Aki's side which inevitably brought their doom.

And back to the topic of mourning, I think the idea of being forgotten, so replaceable and discarded into the past had scared Himeno. Deep down she was scared of being consumed by the oblivion that is the apathetic and replaceable management system of public safety. No one would remember her, no one would cry for her. When she probably cried over her drink late at night.

But then Aki happened.

What she loved was his empathy and the ability to feel so profoundly for other people. She wanted that. She carved that. He wore his heart on his sleeves and she was Hungry to take a bite of it. It is selfish, kind of twisted and so uncharacteristically none sexual of Himeno.

She loves Aki but I think it's more of a, "cry me a river and I will gladly hang myself for you" kind. Her tendency to have sex with anything that moves has no effect on her relationship with Aki nor the feelings she feels for him. It's beyond that.

Though I do think her habit of having sex with almost everyone is more of a bad coping mechanism than anything. Just like Aki, she didn't get to process her grief correctly. And unlike Aki, she can't cry.

Here is a bit of parallel she has with Denji of all people with their hypersexuality and the questionable methods of having and viewing sex. Also in that scene when she makes a deal with Denji with the, "you take Makima and I take Aki". For both of them, their person of affection was someone untenable and unreachable, someone who probably didn't return their feelings.

But what Himeno was wrong about Aki not Loving her back.

Yeah maybe he doesn't love her like the way she wanted him to love. He never viewed her as a lover or someone he can have sex with ( I do have a doubt they must've hooked up at some point or Himeno at least tried something very dubious consent with Aki at some point. ). But Aki cared. And He cared deeply. So much so Himeno basically starts to haunt the narrative from this point on lol.

I don't really hate Himeno, far from it. She's so interesting I would love to put her under a microscope and analysis from where that wrecky thought process of her comes from. She's my yaoi girl. What a little freak.

Their relationship is so Yuri coded I don't even count them as a straight ship lmao