You know I really do think we need to stop pretending like T is some super hormone that makes people pass instantly instead of a hormone that takes years to show full effects. Multiple times I’ve seen people act like the idea of a transmasculine person on T not passing is an impossible idea, and they assume non-passing = pre/no-T.
Not only does it minimize the struggles of trans men who are stuck dealing with discrimination due to ‘non-standard’/mixed sex characteristics due to being on T while not passing/being visibly not a cis man , it’s also sets an unrealistic expectation for trans men pre-T.
Even though i got a more realistic timeline for how and when I’ll get changes before i started T, i still feel an intense shame and hopelessness that im still not passing after a little over a year on T because of how much the people around me acted like T would change me immediately. I’ve met a lot of trans guys who almost give up on transitioning and being happy because they were told that T would make them pass by year two, so they think if they don’t pass by then that they will never pass.
This is not me saying trans guys can never pass - I’ve seen a lot people say the same thing I’m saying and get misinterpreted for it. Trans men can pass and go stealth and very often do. Just that it takes a lot more to pass and go stealth as a cis man than a lot of people think, and I think the talking points surrounding T and how it changes people’s bodies is giving people unrealistic expectations on how fast those changes happen.
it really feels like sometimes when people imagine a trans guy who’s been on T for 1-3 years what they imagine is instead a trans guy who’s been on T for 5-10 and who’s also had top surgery.
Stop looking at trans guys who’ve been on T for years and have had multiple surgeries to compare your transition timeline too. Please try to find yourself trans guys who have only been on T for a year or two or trans guys who’ve been on T but haven’t had surgeries to make sure you fully understand. This stuff takes time. Just because you don’t pass after one year doesn’t mean you will never pass. 🫶 just means you have to wait a bit while your body still goes through puberty again.
