#hhaaaa

Title: alis propriis volat (they fly with their own wings) Rating: T+ (may go up later) Pairing: V.IV Rusty/Raven | C4-621 Tags/CW: Alternative Universe - Canon Divergence, Complicated Relationships, Morally Ambiguous Characters, Implied/Reference Suicide, Implied/Referenced Indentured Servitude, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Medical Trauma, Mute Raven | C4-621, Identity Issues, Wolrdbuilding, Unreliable Narrator Summary: “I’m not here to kill you, buddy.” Slowly, Rusty crouched down. “I’m here to capture you, before Arquebus does.” or; C4-621 manages to escape Institute City on his own after V.II Snail’s failed ambush, but with Handler Walter no longer in contact with him, and Balam essentially destroyed, C4-621’s only ally is the disembodied Ayre. Well, until the RLF swoop in, but that’s its own awkward can of worms. Current Chapter: 12

What do I do with the stuff I’ve written? I think part of why I don’t write as much as I’d like, or rather, don’t finish my many projects, is because I just don’t know what the goal is?

I honestly don’t think publishing traditionally is a viable option for me for various reasons, mainly my concepts are very generic but not executed in a unique enough way to appeal to people. Plus, I live in Sweden, and idk if agents are too hot on international writers. It just seems like a lot of hoops to jump through.

Self-publishing seems more accessible, but it would involve a lot more work and money I don’t have for what seems to be very little or moderate success.

Posting stuff online for free doesn’t motivate me to write because it doesn’t feel like a final enough format for the story, so I’ll just keep iterating and writing and editing into oblivion, which doesn’t exactly solve my problem of not writing or finishing things.

So basically like ... why am I doing this lol. I’m not very good at it in a practical sense. Where am I going with it? And the whole “write for yourself” thing doesn’t work for me fundamentally because 1) I literally don’t write for myself, and b) I do already but then I lose interest because I solely write for myself and just abandon promising projects instead of powering through the hard parts. Writing for myself just leads to this issue I’m having with not finishing anything, and in the end it’s unfulfilling and feels like a waste of time.