Send me a number, any number
Thatâs a lot of questions. I like a lot of questions :D
20.) Snow or rain?: RAIN. Definitely rain. As a life-long New Yorker who actually has to live with the threat of the Great White Horror that isnât racist (so far as we know.......), snow, 3-4 months out of the year, I understand that while it may look pretty and make things super chill (hue) and quiet, it is actually a special kind of hell reserved only for the most awful of sinners.Also, rain is just really nice to listen to.
21.) What celebrity do you look up to?: Tyler Joseph, from Twenty One Pilots. Maybe itâs a little silly, but, seeing somebody like me, with the same (or similar) issues with anxiety and depression and constant crises of faith hop up on stage in front of tens of thousands of people and do what he loves regardless, like they arenât even there... I dunno man, thatâs just really inspiring to me. That could be me. Thatâs going to be me. He also seems like a pretty chill dude to talk to. Heâs funny and seems to have a good head on his shoulders. So yeah, I canât help but look up to the guy.
22.) Who makes you smile regardless?: Regardless of whatever? Hmm... thereâs a few people, mostly friends, but thereâs some celebrities, too. Comedians or YouTubers or bloggers who as soon as see theyâve put out something new, I canât help but smile, itâs like a huge bright spot on my day; I treasure them always. Also? Any tumblr-famous or remotely talented person who deigns to talk to me. Like... what. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
23.) What would you want your name to be if you were the opposite sex?: Amy, no question. No particular reason why other than the fact that I just really love the name. Something about it has always stuck out to me, and it has a nice meaning to it, âbelovedâ <:
24.) Would you die for the ones you love?: The ones I love? Yeah, definitely. I can think of a few people Iâd probably take a bullet for.
25.) Favorite song lyrics?: Oh God where do I start? I could just say âLiterally anything written by Guy Garvey from Elbow because his lyrics are basically poetryâ, or âAnything by Hands Like Housesâ, but if I were to give a few examples, like a top 5... some lyrics that have stuck out to me over the years have been -
âIf I'm a flame, I'm a forest fire speaking savage tongues as I emerge from the hills. I am an avalanche, I am unchained, I'm awoken, I'll unleash hellâ from âA Tale of Outer Suburbia from Hands Like Houses âWeâre not questioning God, just those he chose to carry on his crossâ from the song â*finâ by Anberlin"And no, I'm not afraid, at least not to die, I'm afraid to live and not remember why" from the song âLapseâ by Envy on the Coast
âThrough all this, we decipher, and whatâs worse? Weâre no wiserâ from âCartoons & Macrame Woundsâ by Mew
âI want to be you whenever I see you smilin', âcause it's easily one of the hardest things to do. Your worries and fears become your friends and they end up smilin' at you" from âSmiley Facesâ by Gnarls Barkley
I could list a fuckton more because I have way more music than any sane person should have, but, yeah =P
26.) Have you ever self-harmed?: I... okay, Iâm just going to be super open about this one. No - not in the way youâre probably thinking. I donât like pain. I avoid it at all costs. Iâve tried cutting a few times, actually, but it... I dunno. I also knew scars would be an issue, and I didnât want to have to explain that. So I kind of just... stopped taking care of myself for a while there, instead. I made the conscious decision to let my health go to shit and basically did everything in my power to help that along. It was stupid, and slow, and eventually became a series of bad habits Iâm still dealing with the ramifications of, but I just stopped caring after a while, you know? In time it became my comfort and my way of coping. If it killed me, great. If not, who cares? It all helped to take the pain away. So I dunno. Food was my knife, I guess. It sounds dumb, but... it was what it was.
27.) Sex before or after marriage and why?: Personally? I donât really care anymore. I was raised in a Christian home under some pretty strict ideas of like... morality and Christianity and what it means to be Christian and shit, so, âNo sex before marriageâ was something that was really drilled into me and my sisterâs heads when that became a thing we were learning about. For a while that was the view I held, but these days, I donât think it really matters? Iâm still Christian (more or less...) but my understanding of that is radically different from my parents these days, and I honestly donât think waiting until marriage matters anymore. Itâs all about me and my partner. If weâre ready for it, then thatâs all that matters. If weâd rather wait, then thatâs all that matters. If one of us would rather wait until marriage, then thatâs all that matters. But I honestly donât really care either way. Sex is kind of just an extra thing to me, anyway lmao
