#herfirst100k

They say the first $100K is the hardest. And it’s definitely not for the faint of heart.

About a year ago, I realized that if I pushed myself — got a bit uncomfortable to save and earn more while spending less — I could hit six-figures saved by the end of my 25th year. I turn 26 in July 2020, so the countdown is on!

Saving six-figures is a huge feat, but I feel especially proud of my journey -- I live and work in Seattle (one of the most expensive cities in the U.S.) and have never made above $80k a year. In the time before turning 26, I’m saving and hustling my butt off to get to $100k. Here’s exactly the choices I’ve made and the opportunities I’ve had to get me here.

I  made tens of thousands side hustling

This kick-started my journey towards six-figures. In addition to saving the majority of my 9-5 salary, my first year of freelance social media marketing made me quite a bit of cash that I could immediately save. This first client honestly overpaid me for the work I ended up doing (the scope ended up being less than I thought it would be, and I also negotiated more.) I was able to establish both a SEP IRA and a fully-funded emergency fund with my earnings.

2. I started investing early

Knowing that compound interest is so important, I wanted to start investing early to have my money work for me. Once I started my first big-girl job, I opened my first Roth IRA. Starting to save for retirement at age 22, I was able to max out my Roth each year and also contribute to the SEP IRA and a non-retirement investment account. My first job out of school had a 401(k), but you couldn’t contribute until you were there at least a year. Knowing I wasn’t planning on staying long — I was at that job for a year and a few months — I opened a Roth 401(k) and then rolled my earnings to my Roth IRA. {TOOL: Use Status Money to compare your spending and saving with your peers to see if you’re on track.}

This article was originally published on Bravely.

One time on the internet, a man on Twitter accused me of being sexist because my company is geared towards women. Another time, a man remarked that I was able to save at a high rate because I earned my money working street corners. Still another time, I was told that the wage gap only exists because women become mothers.

As a woman who talks about money on the internet, I’ve opened myself up to criticism from people who don’t believe that women are a marginalized group of people. These people are offended that I point out discrepancies women face in pay or treatment, and sometimes, are offended that I talk about things that women specifically can do to strive for financial equality in the world.

Here’s the thing about all of that.

We don’t live in an equal world. We don’t live in a world where marginalized communities have the same access, the same tools, or the same opportunities as non-oppressed communities. Do I believe men are inherently better at using money than women? No, of course not. But do I believe that men are socialized to be decision makers and are given more chances to work with money? Yes, absolutely.

And the fact that men get such opportunities, and are treated like they can handle them, leads to a world where men are in charge of money. Women led companies received 5% of venture capital funding in 2016. In an even bleaker statistic, women are only 2% of the CEO’s in the S&P 500’s financial services firms. Women aren’t given money to work with, and women aren’t in powerful positions at financial companies.

We’re up against more odds than men are. And let’s not forget that those odds get worse for women of color, disabled women, or immigrant women. And you know what that means? It means that women need a financial playbook that addresses these barriers and helps us crush them on our way to getting paid.

To quote my friend Claire, “It’s hard to be proactively badass when most of what you’re doing is reacting to barriers.”

So, with that in mind, here are the ten financial commandments that women should live by.

1- You shall always negotiate your pay

Yes, negotiating is uncomfortable. Yes, women can be penalized for seeming too aggressive. Yes, negotiation requires research and actual skills to back it up. DO IT ANYWAY.

Women live an average of 5 years longer than men. We need money to live off of. Women pay a pink tax on lots of stuff, from razors to car insurance. We need money, and we need to ask for it.

2- You shall talk about money with friends, peers and loved ones.

Transparency around money is one of the most powerful tools women have at their disposal. Talk about how much money you’re trying to save. Ask your partner how much they make. Ask your friends if they’ve negotiated at work and what tips they have. Sharing actual numbers can highlight when you’re getting screwed, and can help you bring home more.

You guys, I love talking with customer service reps.

Most people find that super weird. Why would you like to be put on hold? Why would you like battling with reps only to be told that “there’s nothing we can do?”

Why do I love it? Because I understand how to do it. Nine times out of ten, I succeed in getting what I want (and sometimes, more than what I want.) I’ve literally saved thousands of dollars, and sometimes earned money/perks, by simply taking a few minutes to call or tweet customer service.

I get it: you don’t want to be that person who complains about every little thing, and I totally understand. But you’re paying for an awesome customer experience (if it’s a major purchase, then even more reason for them to make it right!) That is your hard-earned money, and if you weren’t satisfied in any way, you should have no problem asking the company to fix it.

I just took a trip to Costa Rica with a friend (learn about our life-changing trip here!) and literally earned over $350 in miles, travel credit, and perks by contacting the airline’s customer service when something went wrong (first, a major delay and second, our seat-back screens didn’t work on our international flight.) At a time when companies are putting more stock in loyal customers -- and airlines especially are scrambling to earn your business -- demanding what you paid for just makes sense.

When I tell my friends about my mini-obsession, they say they’d love to do it too, but have no idea how. I’ve prepared an exact script for you, whether you’re on the phone or on social media/email, that has been proven to work.

1. Be polite and jovial...the entire time

If you’re on the phone, the customer service rep will usually state their name and ask how can they help you. They will be more willing to go out of their way to help if you treat them like a real human (shocking, I know.)

Here’s what you say: “Hello NAME, how are you? I’m doing fine, thank you for asking. I’m having an issue and I would love for you to help me.”

By asking them to help, you’re immediately giving them an opportunity for a win. Their brain should go, “Help? Yes! I can do that! That’s what I’m here for!”

2. State what happened

No matter how angry or fed up you are, make sure to still be kind and calm. You want to mention what you expected to happen (being billed a certain amount, a smooth flight, etc.), and why that didn’t happen. Say why you’re frustrated by it, but do not get upset. Mention that you’re disappointed or dissatisfied with the service you received.

You guys, I love talking with customer service reps.

Most people find that super weird. Why would you like to be put on hold? Why would you like battling with reps only to be told that “there’s nothing we can do?”

Why do I love it? Because I understand how to do it. Nine times out of ten, I succeed in getting what I want (and sometimes, more than what I want.) I’ve literally saved thousands of dollars, and sometimes earned money/perks, by simply taking a few minutes to call or tweet customer service.

I get it: you don’t want to be that person who complains about every little thing, and I totally understand. But you’re paying for an awesome customer experience (if it’s a major purchase, then even more reason for them to make it right!) That is your hard-earned money, and if you weren’t satisfied in any way, you should have no problem asking the company to fix it.

I just took a trip to Costa Rica with a friend (learn about our life-changing trip here!) and literally earned over $350 in miles, travel credit, and perks by contacting the airline’s customer service when something went wrong (first, a major delay and second, our seat-back screens didn’t work on our international flight.) At a time when companies are putting more stock in loyal customers -- and airlines especially are scrambling to earn your business -- demanding what you paid for just makes sense.

When I tell my friends about my mini-obsession, they say they’d love to do it too, but have no idea how. I’ve prepared an exact script for you, whether you’re on the phone or on social media/email, that has been proven to work.

1. Be polite and jovial...the entire time

If you’re on the phone, the customer service rep will usually state their name and ask how can they help you. They will be more willing to go out of their way to help if you treat them like a real human (shocking, I know.)

Here’s what you say: “Hello NAME, how are you? I’m doing fine, thank you for asking. I’m having an issue and I would love for you to help me.”

By asking them to help, you’re immediately giving them an opportunity for a win. Their brain should go, “Help? Yes! I can do that! That’s what I’m here for!”

2. State what happened

No matter how angry or fed up you are, make sure to still be kind and calm. You want to mention what you expected to happen (being billed a certain amount, a smooth flight, etc.), and why that didn’t happen. Say why you’re frustrated by it, but do not get upset. Mention that you’re disappointed or dissatisfied with the service you received.

“Go through your email and unsubscribe to newsletters from stores and online retailers. Stores send those emails for a reason: they know there’s a chance you’ll open them up and buy something. Unsubscribe and remove the temptation of making an impulse purchase.” -- Budget Kitty

“Create a table of all your debts and calculate the weighted average cost of all your debt. Start repaying debts with the highest interest rate first to slowly reduce you weighted average cost of debt. Once that hits below 4.25%, then invest like crazy. Have urgency. Then, rinse and repeat until you are on a beach somewhere.” -- Millionaire Mob

“If you aren’t budgeting, sign up for a budgeting tool [Tori note: I like Charlie, and it's free!] that will pull financial data and tell you exactly how much you’re spending each month. It’s secure, free, quick to sign up, and you’ll know where your money goes. But knowing where it goes is just step one, step two is to make sure you adjust your spending so it goes to the right places!” -- Wallet Hacks 

“A great way to improve your finances is to bump your 401k contributions by 1% and see if that really impacts your life. You’ll find that you can adjust to the lower paycheck pretty easily and it won’t be that much lower since it’s pre-tax money. If the impact continues to be pretty invisible, bump it up another % and see how that feels. Your future self will definitely thank you.” -- Time in the Market

“What gets measured, gets managed. Looking at your bank statements, connecting to Mint or Personal Capital [Tori note: I love Personal Capital and Status for net worth tracking], and doing a little spreadsheet work can identify weaknesses and inspire change.” -- The Mastermind Within

Originally published on POPSUGAR, from the Dumpster Dog Blog

Should you invest in Lululemon stock or Tesla stock? Facebook or Apple? Tech or health care? Have you studied your balance sheets? Forward-looking price-to-earnings ratios? Oil prices and housing starts?

J/K! None of that shit matters. (At least, not for most of us.)

With investing, the most important decision you make is not which stock you pick but whether you invest in stocks at all, or bonds, and cash, and other broad categories of investments (called “asset classes”). This big picture decision is called “asset allocation” and should be what gets the majority of your attention.

How does one determine asset allocation? By analyzing personal goals, which are the ovule of all investing decisions. They’re unsexy and boring so folks tend to rush through ’em, but skipping this basic is like agreeing to marry someone without first checking to see if s/he has a job, wants kids, is potty trained, etc. First things first!

When looking at any pool of money, you must always first ask: What is this money for? In other words, what is the goal? Then, think about your goal through these three lenses:

Time Frame

Risk

Knowledge of how the different asset classes (stocks, bonds, cash, etc.) have performed and behave over time.

Before we talk about No. 1 and No. 2, let’s talk about No. 3 for a minute — a quick review of stocks and bonds is in order!

Understanding the Different Asset Classes

A stock is a tiny sliver of ownership of a company. When a company grows, your teeny piece of the pie should (hypothetically) grow with it. A bond, on the other hand, is a contract. You are loaning your money to some entity (a company, the government), and they pay you a stated rate of interest for using your money.

Stocks are expected to make more money than bonds, but that reward comes with a parallel risk! You don’t get 7 percent to 10 percent annual returns in the stock market fo’ freesies! And stock market risk comes in the form of volatility.

Volatility is a total mindfuck. You’ve heard this word used before, but take a minute to marinate in what it means: money you worked your tush off to save could lose a ton of value at any moment and quickly. In 2008, the stock market was down 50 percent. If you had invested $100,000 in the stock market, a few months later you had $50,000.

Bonds, on the other hand, are predictable. You’re probably going to get a lower average rate of return, but there’s less volatility than with stocks. That’s not to say that bonds are risk-free; they aren’t. The only risk-free option is keeping your money in cash.*

Next, let’s explore two examples of saved money. Using our goals, we can determine how to invest. The first is via a down payment on a house. The second is via retirement. Don’t forget to consider time frame and risk!

I know more women than I can count that let their male partners do the “big” and “important” financial tasks, like investing for retirement. Yes, relying on my personal anecdotal evidence is totally problematic, but there’s plenty o’ research to back up my observation: This study says married women take control of major financial decisions only 27% of the time.* (Though, this figure is up from 14% in 2006.)

AND I GET IT. Considering that women do way more than their fair share of the domestic and emotional labor at home, letting yo’ dude handle some money decisions isn’t lazy, it’s a goddamn survival tactic. If he’s willing to rake some leaves, grill some meats, and/or do some investments, sweet lord—we let him. It’s frustrating and predictable and OF COURSE I FUCKING KNOW that “not every relationship is like this,” but I’ve seen the pattern replicate itself enough to know it’s not some unfounded trope, either.

To be clear: We in a judgment-free household!! Always!! I know how it is to be a woman; to feel like Play-Doh being squished through a squeeze & sculpt dough machine, but also to feel left out of and intimidated by conversations historically reserved for humans that look like Alec Baldwin. Really, it makes perfect sense why we avoid Big Important Financial Decisions like they’re the expired cottage cheese in the fridge that we know damn well we need to throw out, but pretend not to see every time we swing open the door.

Though I am 100% sympathetic, I need to state my case for why relying on your husband or boyfriend to “do the money” is a no good, very bad idea. Will I be making fun of men? Of course I will be making fun of men. Will I make some people angry? I will likely make people angry. Will I inspire more women to learn about their financial lives so their livelihoods aren’t shredded by an outside party? THAT’S THE GOAL!!

TOP 4 REASONS THAT A MAN IS NOT A (GOOD) FINANCIAL PLAN

If you only have the energy for one reason, skip down to Reason #4. I cannot have your man cost you half a million dollars.

Reason #1: He Might Not Be Around Forever

You’ve heard this one before. It is most common to talk about the importance of a woman having a hand in the financial planning in terms of a potential traumatic event.

Death can happen. Addiction can happen. Abuse can happen. Plain ol’ change can happen.

Divorce can happen and in fact, is sososososo common. And usually, it’s NOT some crazy “my husband cheated on me with my sister and accidentally posted the video evidence to my Facebook wall” shit (but if it was, contact me—I’ll be your chief writer and dramatist, let’s get that Lifetime Movie Channel money!!)

It’s a helluva lot more likely that, due to the sometimes-banal, often-uneven pressures of a life, a marriage becomes a distorted, unfriendly version of what it once was. Job and money struggles, children or a lack of children, disagreements on things that range from “You gonna put your dishes in the fucking dishwasher for once in your life?” to “Who puts their career on hold to raise the kids?” can disease a relationship. And it can happen to anyone. You already know this, but it could happen to you.

Divorce rates seem to be on the decline, but trends still suggest that almost half of marriages will end in one. And here’s a WAY CRAZIER, MORE UPSETTING stat: Almost 70% of all divorces are filed by women. That’s a lot of heartbreak and disappointment on behalf of married women out there.

As if the emotional tariff isn’t enough, divorce and death can cost a person an amounticus grandicus (official measure) in terms of dollars and cents. And then, you’re on your own to manage your money, potentially for the first time ever. Wanna know the absolute worst time to sit down and really focus on learning about that topic you (understandably) hate and have been sidestepping for years and years and years? Yeah.

Do it before the proverbial excreta smashes the ceiling propeller. Get yourself into a position of money knowledge that is so comfortable that having to potentially sort it all out post-trauma is really no big whoop.

Reason #2: Retired Women Live in Poverty More Than Men

If you are all are not committed to your own financial well-being, you’re putting yourself at major risk of living in poverty as a vulnerable (and adorable) old person. Just yesterday, a friend was telling me that she bought holiday presents for a local senior she “adopted” through the YWCA. Her lil bunny’s holiday wish list tells a crushing story: She hoped for a toothbrush and toothpaste, incontinence supplies, a space heater, and a blanket. This is no Christmas wishlist; these are survival kit supplies. Me, upon hearing this:

Women between the ages of 75 and 79 are 300% more likely to live in poverty than their male counterparts. This is so sad, and so scary. And we CANNOT HAVE THIS for our gang o’ #BadGrannies!!! I don’t know about you, but I’m going to be my own damn sugar mama (bring on the hot younger men and the hot candle wax) and I also need YOU to have money so we do fun shit together until we dead and gone.

And the statistics are even worse for women that are single, divorced, or widowed. ANY OF US could be ANY OF THESE THINGS. (I’m still single if you can even believe it. Mother certainly can’t.)